Tyra

Peace and blessings SR family,
Is it possible to be sponsored from this site?. I am not ready for outside meetings. My friends and family who do go to outside meetings are happy that I'm connected to recovery, but they keep stressing sponorship. They say I did 90 and 90, now its time for a sponsor.:wtf2
Also why is it so important, and is any one being sponsored from this site. Thank you. Be blessed in this day

tellus

I was actually wondering the same thing just this morning.

Pinkcuda

"If you want what we have and are ready to go to any length to get it...."

A Cyber Sponsor sure seems like an easier softer way. You're either willing to go to any length or you're not. Suck it up, go to meetings and do what you're supposed to do!
Someday, God Willing, somebody is going to come to you for help. You need something to pass on to them, and if you say "I don't know, I did an Online Correspondence Course" you will be of little or no value to them in their quest for an answer. Bill said that we pay our debt to the program by passing it on and helping others to achieve sobriety. This is what this program is all about.

tellus

I don't consider the online route "soft," Pinkcuda, I consider it practical, and a step towards the real thing. I have a severe social anxiety disorder, and "suck it up" more often than not leads to panic attacks, in my case. I feel that an online "sponsor" would help me build up to finding the courage for the real thing.

Don't want to cause conflict, just my $0.02.

Pinkcuda

A good Alcoholic can find loopholes all throughout the program. You wanted opinions. Let's wait to hear some more.

Jersey Nonny

Quote:

A good Alcoholic can find loopholes all throughout the program.

Perhaps, rather than "loopholes", these folks were asking legitimate questions while searching for viable alternatives. I see nothing wrong with that.

I searched a Q&A site regarding AA. The response with regard to sponsorship follows.

Quote:

Sponsorship in The Big Book.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Question: Where is the role of a sponsor described in the Big Book?


Answer: I am not sure if there is a section on that but the chapter working with others may be very helpful to you.
_______________

The actual word sponsor or sponsorship does not appear in the First 164 pages of the Big Book.
_______________

Some say that everything in the Big Book from page 89 (the beginning of Chapter 7 - Working With Others) through Page 164 is the "sponsor's instruction manual".

The bottom of Page 18 includes a very long sentence that describes a sponsor.

My personal opinion, for what it's worth, is that ideally a face to face sponsor would be preferred. We alcoholics are masters at manipulation, and it's not as easy to "snow" someone if you're looking him right in the eye.

That being said, there is nothing that says you can't have a temporary sponsor...matter of fact, it's often suggested...just to get the newcomer into the working of the steps. However, since the writing of the Big Book, much has changed, and we've become a computer-driven society. Who's to say, if a pc had been invented back then, we wouldn't all be using on-line sponsorship!?!

And, just for the record, if you read the Steps very carefully, I think you'll find it's absolutely possible to work them without an official sponsor. It isn't rocket science, folks. Also, there are many meetings devoted to studying/reviewing the Steps...lots of pamphlets describing the Steps, and how to work them.

The important thing, IMHO, is to work the Steps...with or without a sponsor

Pinkcuda

I withdraw the loophole statement. I do consider it an easier softer way however.
There are times that your Sponsor is going to tell you things that you don't really want to hear, but need to. There are times that your Sponsor is going to make you do things that you really don't want to, but have to. These things can be filtered through the computer and sure seem easier to me.

Jersey Nonny

We're both entitled to our opinions, and that's what makes the world go round.

Sponsors aren't infallible...they're only alcoholics helping other alcoholics...which is what everyone on this site is doing. In effect, we are all "sponsoring" each other, when you come right down to it.

The 12 and 12 spells out the Steps in great detail. Only someone who is totally illiterate would have any problems understanding what action each Step requires. And, as I pointed out above, there are many pamphlets covering the Steps (particularly 4 and 5, which could be the most difficult).

I still maintain, better to get right to working on the Steps, if the only thing in your way is finding a sponsor.

Surlyredhead

I would normally agree, however, this is a board designed specifically to help people who want to get or stay sober.I remember a few 24 hours ago, when I was new to recovery, the last thing I needed, was to feel like I was being attacked.....that is exactly what it seems that you are doing. The process is different for everyone, some need to go to residential treatment, some need to detox with supervision, some can do it with support groups...and for the record...AA/NA are NOT the only groups that exist for recovery. To tell someone how their recovery process is "supposed" to be is ludicrous. Try to remember what you were felling when you FIRST entered recovery, I am sure no one was at an AA meeting demanding anything. You are still very much a newcomer....as am I...we all still have much to learn. Keep coming..more will be revealed.

Cathy

For the record....I do believe that there are times for "tough love"....but let's keep everything in perspective.

parentrecovers

hey tyra, just a supportive shout out to you! blessings, k

leeside

Why does it have to be the same sex?