taffycita

I had 63 days..(..I've never been able to string together 3 days)...and I relapsed. I ran out of my medicine and didn't have enough money to get it refilled till yesterday. I'm sorta OK...I know relapses happen. I'm just not looking forward to telling my sponser and my AA group...they were all so proud of me!!!! I've been too ashamed to come to this site the past few days....but I checked in tonight and I just want to say to those who are going through the same thing: thankyou for sharingYou are not alone...we CAN do this!!!!:ghug3

spidey2

I may have only been around this forum for a couple days but I have had more support in those couple of days then I ever have. I am taking steps that I never had the courage to take before. Just having folks to talk to helps me clear my mind allot.

I am not gonna lie I have a long way to go on my journey as well as how these things all work.But I can tell ya this.

Pick yourself up,brush yourself off and get your head back into the game. (sorry for the football referance but after all tommorow is Sunday).

I hope this helps in some way.If you need to chat feel free to contact me.

~Spidey~

Pilgrim

Hi Taffy,

Sorry to hear that you feel down today but pleased you still want to stop drinking.

What can you do differently this time? Did you ring your sponsor or someone from your group before you picked up? Have you done the steps?

((((Taffy))) Keep going hun.

kelsh

Hi Taffy,

It is good that you are right back here. Relapse happens and you feel the worst of all. It takes being honest with yourself and others to come online and tell us. That is what we are here for.

We all are sober today aren't we if we haven't picked up a drink or a drug just for today?

Rowan

Thanks for your honesty, Taffy, I know it can be hard when you relapse. You've seen that recovery is possible, so be as honest with your sponsor and group as you have been with us, and begin again.
Keep coming back! I'm glad you're here with us.

GrouchoTheCat

Hang in there taffy, relapsing stinks but you'll get past this.

dave47

Sorry about the relapse Taffy,sounds like you have had a few days feeling bad and are ready to start again.The bigger picture is that you are in a better positon than a few months ago,your people will understand.

CarolD

Day 1 is better than Day Zero

Many of us had false starts before we finally quit drinking.

My AA group never made me feel like a loser
as I did keep trying.

Yes! We can and do recover.

Rusty Zipper

as row mentioned taffy... fess up...

its cleansing to the spirit!

never give up hope!

xxoo

rz

Missymae737

Taffy,

So glad you made it back to us...

Try to remember it gets worse every time you go back out there...Some don't have the chance of coming back...

Thinking of you...

indigo

Back on the bus? that's great.

taffycita

I tried calling sponser ( got answering machine)...I'm in the middle of step 4....,
I'm still trying to figure out where I went wrong.....being off my medicine certanly didn't help ( I take something for the cravings). I do know that I stopped doing daily relfections/prayers......sh@#! this is hard!!!!

taffycita

You guts are fantastic...thanks for the support. I'm going to be honest about what happened at my 7am AA group Monday. I am going to call my sponser tonight. I already feel soooooo much better from reading your posts...Thankyou again!!!

ShawMac

Hey Taffy, Im just going thru the same thing--ive relapsed after 3.5 months--people were so proud--I had also run out of meds(anti-depressant) and also had a back injury now Im sick as a dog trying to crawl out of this. My boss isnt returning my calls-I think Im fired-apparently shes really pissed at me for lettting her down--I feel so badly about it--its not knowing whats going on thats so awful. But despite how sick I feel I am getting a bit better each day--I havent drank in few days, so the drinking is over with,just the awful aftermath.Hang in there and I'll do the same--God bless

BP44

Taffy, if your home group is anything like mine, they will say, " welcome back " or as mine said, "welcome home". I had 7 years when I had the insane notion one night while out of town to have a drink with my steak dinner. Afterall, I had been sober for awhile, I was around people I didn't know, who didn't know me, and certainly it will be different this time. I can relate to Jim and Fred's story in the Big Book. All I have to do is insert my name. That led to 4 years of being back out there. It then took me 2 years to get back into AA after I put down the last drink. It wasn't until 7 months ago, when I was out of options, solutions, miserable and was afraid I was going to drink again that I returned to AA and started all over again. That's when I became willing to do whatever I was told and started doing step work with a sponsor. Day by day it gets a little bit better. This morning I completed my first inventory ever, and am looking forward to 5th stepping it. Finally doing the self searching ego deflating work I've tried to avoid all these years I know will be freeing and bring me closer to God as I know him. I have found there is no shame in starting over. It's what we do if we want to get better. I was scared to be sure. But I was reassured over and over that getting better is not a scary place. Being sick is far more scary than anything I've experienced since I have been back. Keep doing the deal. It gets better.

Captain Kirk

Taffy, you're right. We can do this!