Introduction
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: sarnia ontario
Posts: 128
Introduction
Hi peoples, my name is Taira and I am new to this site, though not to Alanon.
I have been attending alanon for about 10 years now off and on, and have lately hit rather a dry spell due to work and raising my family. I am a single mother, self-supporting and as such have had little time free that coincides with the meetings in my area and I have been missing that contact.
I have left my 'problem drinker', left him, married another, left and keep seeming to fall back into the trap of dating yet another. Have thought about staying and trying to 'work it out' but in my case that was never possible since invariably violence and safety became paramount issues. So I have been single now for quite a while am frankly sick and tired of isolating. Life consisting of work and kids and computer well, its been okay and I've been getting by but have sorely missed my old contacts and those meetings.
Have lately been praying ferverently for direction and I came across this site while looking more specifically for meetings in the Nashville area. I have a week off coming up the end of July and am headed down there.......one of the perks that I have permitted for myself as a result of working long and hard and finally seeing 'some' of the payoffs. Been running into snags at work.....seems the door is closing and at the momment I am only praying and trying to keep a clear head to do the foot work before the next one opens. Its hard and worrisome and so, while checking out a site looking for meetings down in that area (would like to attend one) although I didn't find exactly what I was looking for, I did eventually find this site.
So, dunno, maybe this is where am supposed to land for a while.
I like what I have read thus far. I like the idea of being able to write whats worrying etc and receive an answer when its good to receive that answer.......ie......I can post this tonight and check in again tomorrow after work, after kids are in bed.....at my time when I can best sit down and reflect upon the day and such.
So, this seems good. Am hoping everyone here is doing well and this site helps to bring a sense of serenity to all those who happen upon it as I did tongiht.
Taira
I have been attending alanon for about 10 years now off and on, and have lately hit rather a dry spell due to work and raising my family. I am a single mother, self-supporting and as such have had little time free that coincides with the meetings in my area and I have been missing that contact.
I have left my 'problem drinker', left him, married another, left and keep seeming to fall back into the trap of dating yet another. Have thought about staying and trying to 'work it out' but in my case that was never possible since invariably violence and safety became paramount issues. So I have been single now for quite a while am frankly sick and tired of isolating. Life consisting of work and kids and computer well, its been okay and I've been getting by but have sorely missed my old contacts and those meetings.
Have lately been praying ferverently for direction and I came across this site while looking more specifically for meetings in the Nashville area. I have a week off coming up the end of July and am headed down there.......one of the perks that I have permitted for myself as a result of working long and hard and finally seeing 'some' of the payoffs. Been running into snags at work.....seems the door is closing and at the momment I am only praying and trying to keep a clear head to do the foot work before the next one opens. Its hard and worrisome and so, while checking out a site looking for meetings down in that area (would like to attend one) although I didn't find exactly what I was looking for, I did eventually find this site.
So, dunno, maybe this is where am supposed to land for a while.
I like what I have read thus far. I like the idea of being able to write whats worrying etc and receive an answer when its good to receive that answer.......ie......I can post this tonight and check in again tomorrow after work, after kids are in bed.....at my time when I can best sit down and reflect upon the day and such.
So, this seems good. Am hoping everyone here is doing well and this site helps to bring a sense of serenity to all those who happen upon it as I did tongiht.
Taira
Last edited by ODAT; 06-02-2003 at 09:33 PM.
Grace Under Fire
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Another world
Posts: 536
Hi Taira,
Welcome, glad you found us.
I can relate to a whole lot you said. I
am the Mom of two addicts but have been
in and out of abusive alcoholic relationships.
I have really isolated this last year also, and I dunno if I will ever be in another
relationship again. Trying to figure out
who I am, and what I really want.
Sounds like you have alot of recovery
under your belt, and doing well for yourself.
Take a look around if you haven't already!
Hugs,
Welcome, glad you found us.
I can relate to a whole lot you said. I
am the Mom of two addicts but have been
in and out of abusive alcoholic relationships.
I have really isolated this last year also, and I dunno if I will ever be in another
relationship again. Trying to figure out
who I am, and what I really want.
Sounds like you have alot of recovery
under your belt, and doing well for yourself.
Take a look around if you haven't already!
Hugs,
Member
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: California
Posts: 329
Welcome Taira,
I know that your going to enjoy reading the posts here! There are so many wonderful people here and we all are praying for eachother!! You sound like a very strong lady. We are pleased to have you with us!
Prayers and hugs,
matters
I know that your going to enjoy reading the posts here! There are so many wonderful people here and we all are praying for eachother!! You sound like a very strong lady. We are pleased to have you with us!
Prayers and hugs,
matters
believer
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: walking in faith
Posts: 1,023
HI Taira,
Welcome! I read your awesome response to Pal44 and I'm glad you've found us! Coming here has definitely been good for me and my recovery, and I hope you find the same support.
I'm not sure about your background but you mentioned repeating the trap of falling for problem drinkers. We also have an adult children of alcoholics forum. Perhaps the next step may be to start looking at the past and what might be the root cause of these patterns. (Just my little ole $.02). Anyway, hop around, check things out, and see what moves you.
Again welcome and hope to see you again soon.
Hugs,
JG
Welcome! I read your awesome response to Pal44 and I'm glad you've found us! Coming here has definitely been good for me and my recovery, and I hope you find the same support.
I'm not sure about your background but you mentioned repeating the trap of falling for problem drinkers. We also have an adult children of alcoholics forum. Perhaps the next step may be to start looking at the past and what might be the root cause of these patterns. (Just my little ole $.02). Anyway, hop around, check things out, and see what moves you.
Again welcome and hope to see you again soon.
Hugs,
JG
Member
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: where I need to be
Posts: 157
Hi Taira,
Just read your post and something that came to mind is a post by Ann that surfaced a few days ago regarding begin In-Between. It's an excellent read and I think it will help you understand that it's ok to be where you are right now.
Another suggestion for you is a book I've just read called "Safe People" by Drs. Henry Cloud and John Townsend. It's about finding relationships that are good for you and how to avoid those that aren't. It lists characteristics of unsafe people and why we choose unsafe relationships.
I like your statement that "maybe this is where I'm supposed to land for awhile." That was good for me to read this morning.....that this is where I'm supposed to be right now. I'll continue to work on my recovery and take care of me, and work to accept that it's ok to be "here." I know that I won't be "here" forever.
Take care, and keep posting. I, too, am fairly new to this forum, however, I've been involved with Alanon, on and off, for over 20 years. I've found SR to be very accessible and have learned a lot from these wonderfully supportive people.
Sarah
Just read your post and something that came to mind is a post by Ann that surfaced a few days ago regarding begin In-Between. It's an excellent read and I think it will help you understand that it's ok to be where you are right now.
Another suggestion for you is a book I've just read called "Safe People" by Drs. Henry Cloud and John Townsend. It's about finding relationships that are good for you and how to avoid those that aren't. It lists characteristics of unsafe people and why we choose unsafe relationships.
I like your statement that "maybe this is where I'm supposed to land for awhile." That was good for me to read this morning.....that this is where I'm supposed to be right now. I'll continue to work on my recovery and take care of me, and work to accept that it's ok to be "here." I know that I won't be "here" forever.
Take care, and keep posting. I, too, am fairly new to this forum, however, I've been involved with Alanon, on and off, for over 20 years. I've found SR to be very accessible and have learned a lot from these wonderfully supportive people.
Sarah
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
Taira
I want to welcome you too and hope you will feel right at home here. I too have trouble getting to as many meetings as I used to (CoDA is my fellowship), and I have found these boards a wonderful tool to practice my recovery with terrific people.
The post referred to above is "To Everyone Who is In-Between" and is at the very top of the Nar-Anon board. It comes from a book by Melody Beattie called "The Language of Letting Go" and if you have not read that book, do yourself a huge favour and get it - it's wonderful.
Please make yourself comfortable, and help yourself to the coffee and Danish, grab a pair of bunny slippers and join us on our journey. Glad you found us.
P.S. I found this site over a year ago, purely by accident and I have to say that I don't believe in accidents like that - God takes me where I need to be.
I want to welcome you too and hope you will feel right at home here. I too have trouble getting to as many meetings as I used to (CoDA is my fellowship), and I have found these boards a wonderful tool to practice my recovery with terrific people.
The post referred to above is "To Everyone Who is In-Between" and is at the very top of the Nar-Anon board. It comes from a book by Melody Beattie called "The Language of Letting Go" and if you have not read that book, do yourself a huge favour and get it - it's wonderful.
Please make yourself comfortable, and help yourself to the coffee and Danish, grab a pair of bunny slippers and join us on our journey. Glad you found us.
P.S. I found this site over a year ago, purely by accident and I have to say that I don't believe in accidents like that - God takes me where I need to be.
Paused
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: ohio
Posts: 322
Hi Taira
Glad your here-I am learning that things dont seem to happen purely by coincidence ! Your yrs in the program can be put to good use here especialy by myself with only 1 year in and so much to learn. When I think i have something down pat seems something happens to show me, uhhh no i dont.I try not to be hard on myself and take my days as they come and most days
are pretty darn good in themselves.
While your down south check out the yellow pgs for the area, bet you'll find a meeting and make some fellow alonites very happy that you did(not to mention yourself)
God Bless
liddy
Glad your here-I am learning that things dont seem to happen purely by coincidence ! Your yrs in the program can be put to good use here especialy by myself with only 1 year in and so much to learn. When I think i have something down pat seems something happens to show me, uhhh no i dont.I try not to be hard on myself and take my days as they come and most days
are pretty darn good in themselves.
While your down south check out the yellow pgs for the area, bet you'll find a meeting and make some fellow alonites very happy that you did(not to mention yourself)
God Bless
liddy
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