Imagine..........
A little south of sane
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: "For peace of mind, we need to resign as general manager of the universe."
Posts: 177
Imagine..........
I started to write this and then I stopped and tossed all my words out.
I was not finding the right way to express what I want to say.
I'm going to try again.
My son is a recovering heroin addict.
Sometimes my imagination has played out worse case scenarios.
I think co-dependents-as a group-are for the most part gifted (or cursed) with these absolutely outstanding imaginations.
Most of the time, those scenarios I played out inside my head did not happen.
Yet, they had a profound effect on me at that time. A negative effect.
Now, it's come to me that our imaginations are something we can control (up to a point). If one is going to think of a negative situation, couldn't they just as well also think of something with a positive outcome?
If we begin to control our thought process would that perhaps effect our mood in general? Could it perhaps, at the very least, make us feel a little more peaceful?
What if you gave yourself permission to have positive thoughts?
What if..you took it a step forward and imagined positive outcomes?
What would you,....... what would you think of?
Do you think it might make a small difference?
sigh
I was not finding the right way to express what I want to say.
I'm going to try again.
My son is a recovering heroin addict.
Sometimes my imagination has played out worse case scenarios.
I think co-dependents-as a group-are for the most part gifted (or cursed) with these absolutely outstanding imaginations.
Most of the time, those scenarios I played out inside my head did not happen.
Yet, they had a profound effect on me at that time. A negative effect.
Now, it's come to me that our imaginations are something we can control (up to a point). If one is going to think of a negative situation, couldn't they just as well also think of something with a positive outcome?
If we begin to control our thought process would that perhaps effect our mood in general? Could it perhaps, at the very least, make us feel a little more peaceful?
What if you gave yourself permission to have positive thoughts?
I imagine myself swimming in the ocean.......
A full moon drops sparkles of light across the water
My body floats up and over each incoming wave
No cell phones, no traffic sounds, no voices calling my name.
the only sound the wind and the waves rolling into the shore
The water is cool but not cold
I am safe
I can stay here as long as I want...
A full moon drops sparkles of light across the water
My body floats up and over each incoming wave
No cell phones, no traffic sounds, no voices calling my name.
the only sound the wind and the waves rolling into the shore
The water is cool but not cold
I am safe
I can stay here as long as I want...
What if..you took it a step forward and imagined positive outcomes?
What would you,....... what would you think of?
Do you think it might make a small difference?
sigh
Member
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: GO PENS
Posts: 1,151
Sigh,
I am so glad you came here to share that today. I think it was for me. My daughter is also a recovering heroin addict and I need some positive reinforcement for tonight. She was invited to a Halloween party with someone she works with. She doesn't know him very well. She and I both know that there will be a lot of drinking there. I am worried that she will drink. I am worried about her drinking something that someone has slipped something into. I am worried, worried, worried.
Basically I am driving myself crazy with worry over this today. I wish she wouldn't go.
I am trying to think positive but the negative is winning.
I am so glad you came here to share that today. I think it was for me. My daughter is also a recovering heroin addict and I need some positive reinforcement for tonight. She was invited to a Halloween party with someone she works with. She doesn't know him very well. She and I both know that there will be a lot of drinking there. I am worried that she will drink. I am worried about her drinking something that someone has slipped something into. I am worried, worried, worried.
Basically I am driving myself crazy with worry over this today. I wish she wouldn't go.
I am trying to think positive but the negative is winning.
A little south of sane
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: "For peace of mind, we need to resign as general manager of the universe."
Posts: 177
Lobo
trust
trust yourself
trust yourself that no matter what happens
you'll deal with it
when it happens
hugs from one mom to another
sigh
trust
trust yourself
trust yourself that no matter what happens
you'll deal with it
when it happens
hugs from one mom to another
sigh
Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Omak WA
Posts: 1,049
I agree that we need to decide what we can change (by worrying) or what we have no control over. We will not be going everywhere with our kids. It they choose to do something negative and hurtfull to themselves we have no control over it yet again.
I was the worrier of the family and just seemed to spin my wheels. I would get in such a denial of whole situations and did not trust anyone.
When I started AA, the Serenity Prayer was the first one thing that helped me get through each day. I learned what I could change and what I couldn't change...so knew if I couldn't change something then it wouldn't do any good to worry about it.
Sometimes I feel like I still stick my head in the sand so I don't have to think about the negatives in my life right now. Most of them are about my son that is a quadraplegic and won't be changing or getting any better. I help him when he asks, and sometimes that isn't very often.
He lives in his own home with caregivers. He is 38 years old now and was 33 when he had his wreck. He was in the debths of alcoholism when he drove over a cliff to try to commit suicide. I had helped him as much as he would let me. He went to alcohol treatment & mental health counseling for his depression but nothing clicked for him.
I just pray for him and listen when he wants to talk. I was a Geriatric Mental Health Counselor working with the Elderly. I had a lot of tools in my own tool box to help myself but what worked for me doesn't work for someone else. We all have to look for our way out.
I know the suffering we mothers go through to try to lead our children in the right direction but everyone of my five children are different. Right now, two don't drink, one drinks socially, & the two others abuse alcohol. Where will it end....no one knows.
kelsh
I was the worrier of the family and just seemed to spin my wheels. I would get in such a denial of whole situations and did not trust anyone.
When I started AA, the Serenity Prayer was the first one thing that helped me get through each day. I learned what I could change and what I couldn't change...so knew if I couldn't change something then it wouldn't do any good to worry about it.
Sometimes I feel like I still stick my head in the sand so I don't have to think about the negatives in my life right now. Most of them are about my son that is a quadraplegic and won't be changing or getting any better. I help him when he asks, and sometimes that isn't very often.
He lives in his own home with caregivers. He is 38 years old now and was 33 when he had his wreck. He was in the debths of alcoholism when he drove over a cliff to try to commit suicide. I had helped him as much as he would let me. He went to alcohol treatment & mental health counseling for his depression but nothing clicked for him.
I just pray for him and listen when he wants to talk. I was a Geriatric Mental Health Counselor working with the Elderly. I had a lot of tools in my own tool box to help myself but what worked for me doesn't work for someone else. We all have to look for our way out.
I know the suffering we mothers go through to try to lead our children in the right direction but everyone of my five children are different. Right now, two don't drink, one drinks socially, & the two others abuse alcohol. Where will it end....no one knows.
kelsh
Member
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: East Tawas, MI
Posts: 3,683
Sigh, I love your posts. They speak to me at times when I need to hear it. I was also a worry wart. Alcoholic dad and chaotic childhood made me so. I have really been trying to focus on the positive, some days are easier than others. When I visited my daughter today, I decided to send out positive energy. I do believe that negative energy has not only an effect on us but others around us. She was very nervous at first, but I remained calm and focused and pretty soon it was like we had never been apart. I am going to try to stay in the positive no matter what tomorrow brings. Hugs and thanks, Marle
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
Originally Posted by Sigh 
What if..you took it a step forward and imagined positive outcomes?
What would you,....... what would you think of?
Do you think it might make a small difference?
sigh
What would you,....... what would you think of?
Do you think it might make a small difference?
sigh
When I suffered with insomnia and night terrors, something that helped me get back to sleep was taking myself on a mental tour of my grandmother's house. It was a wonderful old home and I just take my mind through each room, looking at the wallpaper and the pictures of my ancestors and the tapestry on the wall. And I smell her bread in the oven and my grandfather's pipe filled with Old Chum tobacco (I still love that smell).
Our mind can be pulled out of the darkness, we just need a light place to take it for a while.
Sigh, you never fail to move me with your wonderful way with words and great thought waves.
Hugs
Administrator
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: a better place
Posts: 4,047
A positive attitude and thought makes a huge difference in my life, and something that helps me to turn from negative to positive is gratitude....I just count my blessings.
StrivingToThrive
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: san diego, ca
Posts: 425
The first time i read this I thought it was nice, but i wasn't ready for it.
Tonight i am! thank you!
I liked the possibility of taking myself away mentally to a place where I could chose to be positive and serene. A place where i couldn't be harmed or do any harm to myself. But most importantly for me was the permission to visualize a positive outcome. why not? I can just as easily think of that as I can think of a bad ending right? If I can worry before my fears become realized or dismissed, then i can just as easily think of a good out come. Thanks! I'll try it.
Cathy
Tonight i am! thank you!
I liked the possibility of taking myself away mentally to a place where I could chose to be positive and serene. A place where i couldn't be harmed or do any harm to myself. But most importantly for me was the permission to visualize a positive outcome. why not? I can just as easily think of that as I can think of a bad ending right? If I can worry before my fears become realized or dismissed, then i can just as easily think of a good out come. Thanks! I'll try it.
Cathy
Sunny Side Up
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Sth Australia
Posts: 3,802
Kelsh!
I was feeling really depressed today, until I read your post. Thanks for reassuring me, that I am just his mother and her sister, not their keepers.
As hard as it gets I still pray the outcome for them will be great.
I was feeling really depressed today, until I read your post. Thanks for reassuring me, that I am just his mother and her sister, not their keepers.
As hard as it gets I still pray the outcome for them will be great.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
