darkinmysilence

I am a recovering alcoholic (4 months-ish) and I am having no trouble, but a friend of mine is addicted to extasy and pot. he keeps telling me he's going to detox, but just 20 minutes ago he called and asked me if i wanted to smoke up with him. He told me that right after we did that he would go to detox (I would assume that's frowned upon).Obviously i declined, and obviously I can't make him go. Does anyone have any advice to persuade him? He's a good friend of mine and he is destroying his relationships with everyone including his family. I want to see him succeed.

Ann

Welcome to SR.

For the sake of your own sobriety, staying away from him is a good idea.

Sadly, he will go or not go whether you smoke up with him or not. It sounds more like he'd like to take you down with him.

If he really wants to go to detox, he will find a way and go.

I learned all this with my son over many years of the same old story.

My prayers go out for your friend and congratulations to you for your sobriety.

Hugs

GiveLove

I'm so sorry. I know how you must feel.

It seems like you have your own burdens. It also seems like your friend isn't really thinking about the fact that you're struggling with your own sobriety right now (even if it's easier for you, it's still work) Congratulations on your four months!

All you can do is be honest with him about how you feel, express what you hope he'll do, and that you give a sh*t, and then let it go. You can't force him. He has to do it on his own, for himself and not for anyone else.

I wish this were easier.

Good luck.
GL

caileesnana

You need to take care of yourself first. If you're like me, I am good at caring for everyone EXCEPT me! I am learning to be different, and the more I change, the more changes I see around me.
Prayers for you
susan

nytepassion

Remember .. Misery loves company

I understand that you would like to see your friend get himself together ... it is only natural for us to want the best for our friends .. but unfortunately YOU wanting it isn't enough ... Your friend has to want it ... Until it is what he wants he will continue to make getting high his priority over all else.

Your friend obviously isn't thinking about your RECOVERY and if he can get you to partake in 'the festivities' then he can have someone to get high with rather then someone who will encourage him to get help.... Take care of you and guard your recovery .. it is priceless.

****{Hugs}}}
Passion

darkinmysilence

i understand. one of the first steps i took to stop drinking was removing myself from situations that made me want to drink..i guess putting myself in similar (though not identical) situations would be kind of careless. thanks.