zorilla

i've been an alcoholic for 20 yrs.i have been sober before for long periods of time but i seem to forget how bad it is and think that i can just drink one or two and quit.well i'm right back to the same place that i was 20 yrs ago.i'm drinking just as much as i did before;having blackouts;doing very stupid things.

i have a 14 yr old daughter and everytime i buy beer i can see the disappointment in her eyes.she has asked me to quit and it made me feel so bad that i couldn't.but i know i can quit;i've done it before and i'm not giving up...i'm tired of existing but not living.being this way is no life;i need to change(a scarey thought).i don't like change it's uncomfortable.

being bored seems to be a big problem when i quit drinking;i know try to stay busy.
AA of course but i'm wondering what other people do out there that has helped them stay sober.i need as much advice that i can get;please tell me things that have helped keep you sober.........................

NOMOMERLOTMAMMA

"i need to change(a scarey thought).i don't like change it's uncomfortable."

It sure is. Hi Zorilla. I'm glad that you are here and willing to try to be sober. I stay sober with AA. I'm working on my steps right now and that is a huge help for me too. Im really working on changing the way I was into something that is better.

Think how much your 14 year old will love to just hang out with you. Mine does now, and that's pretty cool.

And, being the first to respond, please check in with a doc regarding your detox. It can be dangerous.

Keep posting,

Karen

SaTiT

I embrace my bordom..there's nothing worng with being becuase
sometimes it's peaceful. i rather be bore than with a hang over.

After i embrace it, for some stupid reason i move beyound it and
start doing things to stay bussy. I still have to becarful..it's just
where I'm at becuase i stay bussy to avoid other issue or it's a
way of me numbing out...kind of like being a workalholic..it went hand
in hand with my drinking.

I bascially just clean house on the outside..for some reason I need
to see it in action, I clean one conner at a time.
mmm i've been clean the yard one conner at a time.

then i eventaully do it on the inside.

I have hobbies, I've allowed myself to do those hobbies from the
many years I've been sober.

Bordom is not so much if I'm bussy or not. It's a state of being
or how I feel. Becuase i can get bore with something I really enjoy
doing. So try not to anylize it and just embrace it..and it passes as
it always dose.

yeap, being in the moment is a bit hard sometime especailly early in
soberity. But the paradox is when I'm in the moment my worries
gose away. But you know...we want everything to get better overnite.
we didn't hit bottom overnite so we're not going to get well overnite.

it's been a while since i've detox, but as i can recalled. i didn't take
anything too seriousely. You know... those emotional roller coaster
and my mind so a bit foggy. So i bascailly just gave myself a break
and didn't pick up no matter what.

lucymae

Stay busy for awhile. Go to lots of meetings. Get involved. Fake it till you make it. Your Higher Power has great plans for you but you need to stay sober, honest, open and willing. I know this all sounds corny but its true for me after being sober for 14 years.

hugs

CarolD

Hi again....

Life is in constant change
The key for me
is to enbrace positive changes
and drop destructive actions.

That is where my AA Steps help immensley.

blessings

ANGELINA243

[QUOTE=zorilla;1506484]i seem to forget how bad it is and think that i can just drink one or two and quit.well i'm right back to the same place....i'm drinking just as much as i did before;having blackouts;doing very stupid things.

..[QUOTE]
I know how you feel. That's why I decided to join the AA fellowship (and actually start working through all 12 steps this time). I am scared and don't know how to "live sober" but on the other hand--I definitely do not want to die drunk. I have a teenage son--and no child deserves to lose a parent under something that could have possibly been prevented. I wish you well and hope you find your own "path to recovery". God bless.

best

When I was doing things for "me"...what can I get out of this or that...
That is when boredom could set in or frustration when things didn't go as I wanted them to go.
Take your daughter on outings... Not for what you can gather from the trips but what she will gather from the trips. Let her smile be your reward.

An example I had... took my son fishing. Thinking I would be able to fish. Set up his rod and started to fish myself. His energy level had him needing his rod cast out every 3 minutes. I couldn't fish if he was going to fish. My trips became that of showing him how to fish and watching his joy when he would catch a fish.

Change does not need be uncomfortabe... We just need refocus and look to enjoy the moments from a different angle.

dave47

HI Zorilla,i work more and try to help out more.Plus i try to be as involved with the kids as i can.Plus if you are bored you can easily pass a few hours on here.