stillsearching

Well...our daughter is having her birthday coming up next month. My inlaws..who I don't really speak with anymore ( since she always seemed to have thoughts of why my husband drinks and it all had to do with me) will be coming up from out of State as they do every year. I really don't care to be around them anymore and I think I have the right to choose that. However she sent me a e-mail a couple of weeks ago about coming for the birthday...I did not respond. Well, I talked with her today and told her that I did not have any definate plans as of yet for a b-day part. What I am really thinking of doing is planning the party when my husband is at work (since he could stop home during work) that way I don't have to worry about him being loaded like he was at the family get together we had in our home last month...not just drunk mind you....staggering drunk. I am not going to go through that again.

She asked if they could take our daughter out for supper, fine with me. But, I am sure my husband will want to go. Now, I do not let my husband drive our daughter anywhere, as I never know how much he has been drinking.

After we hung up I sent her a e-mail asking that if my husband wishes to go with could they pick them up as I never know how much he has been drinking...I would rather be safe than sorry.

I have really had so much going on with my elderly parents, my school work and taking care of my home and family that I really have been working on detatching myself from his drinking, although I know he is still drinking each and every day, I don't go looking for his bottles anymore, I figure what's the point, it just upsets me. But several times this week when I have walked out into the garage, he is hurrying away from his "special" corner where he hides his booze....like I don't know what's going on.

What do you guys think about sending that info to her? She does know about his drinking and how bad it is...but, I think my priority needs to be with my 8 yr old not his mother.

misslisa

Very wise I say! Yes your priorities are for your child! I have had to detach myself from my own parents! Im clean and sober now, but they are soooo used to caring for my kids that they have interfered now way too much. Everything I do now and also those that I associate with are in my kids best interests. I dont try and 'please' my parents, aunties or uncles anymore.

They know of his drinking problem right? so for them to be asked to pick your husband up is being a responsible parent. Planning something for the day is great ... like you said so that he wont end up staggering drunk! cause that is so dam embarrassing for a child!!

good luck my friend!

misslisa

Barbara52

Sounds like you are doing all the right things to me.