Gran53

My 16 year old daughter tried to commit suicide last week by OD'ing on 23 pills (zanex and kolopin). After 39 hours in ICU she was transferred to a NH/MR facility. After 7 days in that facility and recomendations from everyone there, we placed her in one of the most highly recommended adolescent rehab places in the area. She agreed to Rehab.. Its been 5 days and today was the first time she was allowed to call. It did not go well. "She doesn't want to be there, she is not an addict, she's doing her time and then going back sober to her regular high school etc etc. " I don't fell guilty about sending her to this rehab. I know she smoked pot, I know she has done mushrooms, I know she has done zanex beside her suicide attempt. I realize we are dealing with a mental health issue and a additcion. She says its abuse and she can stop with out help. I see no difference in abuse and addiction, if she is using to cope with her issues than its an addiction. I know its only been 5 days and she is willful and stubborn. My question is; if she doesn't come to terms with her issues, how do I bring her home in 25 days? What do I say when we do go to visit her Sunday. I am babbeling but I was just wandering waht other parents have done, and if there are any recoving teens on the forum taht have gone through the same thing?

Afraid2Succeed

There's abuse and there's dependency. Regardless of which one, I think you're doing the right thing. She tried to take her life so she obviously is not thinking in the right frame of mind. Don't mind her complaints and belief that she can quit on her own.

I have an idea which place you brought her too, since I'm from Philly. She's in good hands with specialists. If they do their jobs right, they will set up an aftercare wraparound plan for her. That might include therapy sessions, AA meetings, etc. Ask the experts at rehab to inform you of their plan afterwards.

Suicide attempts are huge red flags and most facilities will do all they can.

cmc

Welcome to SR. What you can do is find out what resources the rehab offers to families and start attending Alanon meetings. Coming here is a lifeline for many of us.

What Afraid2 said about a aftercare plan is usually how these programs work. My son was an adult by the time he entered a program, so things were handled differently. Most places for teens involve the parents by requiring parents' meetings and working with the counselors too. If her program doesn't offer this, you might want to find an Alanon program that other parents of kids from her rehab attend.

I think you have the right idea about abuse/addiction and that's good progress for you. There are lists of suggested reading material in the sticky threads on this forum that are very helpful.

As overwhelming as this all is right now, and I won't sugarcoat the facts, addiction is a progressive disease, but it can get better- for YOU- regardless of what is happening with your child.

Sadly, too many moms and dads have experienced what you are facing now, but the good thing to know is that you never have to face it alone. I'm glad you found SR.

Spiritual Seeker

The addicts do what we call "quacking" from rehab....You don't have to react to it.
25 days is so minimal of time bec all the research shows that the longer rehabs of 4 mos to a yr. have a better chance of recovery. Is there any way to arrange that? While she is under age 18 you can mandate this once she is adult age you have no ability to force treatment. Talk to her counselors and figure out all your options.

Gran53

Thanks Everybody There is family counseling coming up soon, the family interaction, that the facility uses, is while she is there and after she gets out too. we plan on attending all of it. We are working to find placement for this issue, but also continue her education, after she completes her 30 days. it may not be a residental program but a "intense" out patient program. We will have to continue looking at our options. I imagine it just gets harder before it gets easier.

parentrecovers

nice to meet you, gran. get involved with the family counseling and voice your concerns about the plan for coming home. there are options like halfway houses -

blessings, and keep posting - k

(you going to go to alanon or naranon meetings? alanon really helps me.)

Rella927

Welcome to SR Gran! Keep coming back...it will get harder before it get's easier yes but you are not alone! Al-Anon could be a good resource and you found us so that is a great start too! Keep posting!