aasharon90

Hi Im Sharon and Im an Alcoholic.

By the Grace of my HP and people
like you here in SR I havent had
a drink of alcohol since 8-11-90.

For that and you I am truely grateful.

You cant live till you die....open
you eyes and see how beautiful
life is.....

I almost died ....crashed and rode
in the back of an EMS truck which
i dont remember.....

That was my first encounter....

A punctured spleen from numerous
broken ribs...i almost bled to death until
they removed it....

Spent 10 day recoverying in Feb 1990...

3 months recoverying with no alcohol,
only pain pills....i healed nicely to only
return to my old habit and picked up
a drink......

The progression of my disease allowed
me to spiral out of control to where i
wanted to end my life....

With a hand full of pain pills and my glass
of wine, i gulped it down thinking this is
how its gonna end....

Off to bed i went with that intention...

Till the next morning after my kids couldnt
wake me, i heard a faint ringing of the phone
next to my bed....

My HP was calling me to let me know
He wasnt thru with me yet.....

Aug 90 a family intervention took
place where i rode
in the back of a handless police
car off to rehab for the next 28 days,,,,

I recieved the tools and knowledge
of my disease of alcoholism and was
set on the path of recovery to learn
to stay sober one day
at a time sharing my own experiences
strengths and hopes with others.

Today i have my eyes open wide
to a beautiful world of recovery....

I didnt die.

Thanks for letting me share.

Aysha

I thought i was already dead inside after so many years of using. Too many close calls physically to count. So I guess I just didnt care and in May decided to try and make it official.. Well Didnt happen Thank God.
A little over 13 years of cheating death everyday and possibly trying to die.
I think now is a good time to start trying to live.
Good topic as always Sharon..Thx

Luckyv2

I was the walking dead, mentally, spiritually, emotionally, and might have well been physical also.

I never want to have to go back to that life, although at times I think that it would be OK, I can handle it now. LOL I never could handle it before so why now? So today I just keep moving as best as I can!

Octoman

I never realised how dead I was until I stopped drinking. My emotional centre was dead, my ability to make decisions was dead. I was the living dead. With the explosion of emotions I have felt since, I have started remembering how to enjoy life again.

Missymae737

Hi Sharon,

I shudder to think how close I came to death...In the end I truly was committing slow suicide...

I lay in a bed that wasn't familiar to me, lost my home, got up only to go to the bathroom, and get more booze...I drank until I passed out...I had this sick feeling that I would die if I continued drinking.

I remember thinking of my mother who passed away at the age of fifty from this disease. She died in her bed from heart failure...She left a three year old daughter and six other children. So tragic, and here I was about to leave my two son's and two grandchildren..

Then AA happened and SR...I have come back from the brink of death. Today I am living life and grateful...

Aysha

I use to always think living was having excitement in your life.
I couldnt be more wrong.
All that fast pace..unstable..chaotic living is just a mess.
Life in the slow lane is truly living.
Taking it slow...Enjoying everything right down to the littlest simplest things.
Yea..I like it over here in the slow lane alot better.

Cekiya

I so, so, so agree with all of the above. Thanks Sharon and all for these posts.

Recovery, for me, is, in a sense, being re-born. I am thrilled to discover what it is like to go outside for a walk with my dog at 6 a.m. and breathe in the cool, fall air, see the colors of the sun rising, hear the crickets still chirping from the night and the birds joining in with their morning songs, and to just feel gratitude that I am alive and have finally found the path to right living.

You are so right, Chiynita, when you speak about the fallacy in thinking that the purpose of life is finding excitement. I am just beginning to understand that living, in the real sense of the word, is about finding a sense of peace in knowing that I am here because I am supposed to be here. If I permit Truth to show me the right way to lead my life, I won't have to worry about anything again. That is a very good feeling, and in that belief, I am finding more security than I have ever realized before.

Have a great Friday!

Peace to You,
Cekiya