My sister is using again.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: phoenix arizona
Posts: 741
My sister is using again.
IMy sister came home and brought the bf, too.
They slept all day and my sister was in no condition to pick up my niece from school.
They had been up for days/nights and were crashing.
I was already at the house visiting with my grandma so I went with my mom to the pre-school and got her. The evening was ok, we had dinner and I listened to my mom. My mom broke down and said she doesn't know how to take care of herself when her daughter is so messed up and can't care for her own child. I suggested she come with me to a meeting and find some more support. Unfortunately, so many people have been through it, too.
It all boils down to the fear because we've been down this road with my sister in the past. Now there's a child to think of this time.
I'm most proud of my dad tonight because he didn't let the bf stay and when I was leaving, he told him let's go, he couldn't stay there tonight. So my dad drove the guy somewhere.
My feelings are a little all over the place. I'm not getting caught up in the drama this time around. I have more compassion for my sister and her addiction. She needs help, but isn't ready to admit it. She's been clean for years, but never dealt with the issues she still has. The cycle has begun again. This time, though I have more understanding of the problem and know that I can only help myself. I can't save her or my parents from the pain. I'm still choosing peace while this is happening.
They slept all day and my sister was in no condition to pick up my niece from school.
They had been up for days/nights and were crashing.
I was already at the house visiting with my grandma so I went with my mom to the pre-school and got her. The evening was ok, we had dinner and I listened to my mom. My mom broke down and said she doesn't know how to take care of herself when her daughter is so messed up and can't care for her own child. I suggested she come with me to a meeting and find some more support. Unfortunately, so many people have been through it, too.
It all boils down to the fear because we've been down this road with my sister in the past. Now there's a child to think of this time.
I'm most proud of my dad tonight because he didn't let the bf stay and when I was leaving, he told him let's go, he couldn't stay there tonight. So my dad drove the guy somewhere.
My feelings are a little all over the place. I'm not getting caught up in the drama this time around. I have more compassion for my sister and her addiction. She needs help, but isn't ready to admit it. She's been clean for years, but never dealt with the issues she still has. The cycle has begun again. This time, though I have more understanding of the problem and know that I can only help myself. I can't save her or my parents from the pain. I'm still choosing peace while this is happening.
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
No matter how much recovery we have or how strong we become, it still tears at our heart to see someone we love slip back into the darkness of addiction.
If she had years of sobriety, she will remember how good that felt, and my prayers go out that she reaches out for help soon.
Bless you all for supporting each other and most of all, God Bless the child.
Hugs
If she had years of sobriety, she will remember how good that felt, and my prayers go out that she reaches out for help soon.
Bless you all for supporting each other and most of all, God Bless the child.
Hugs
On a tear
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Volcano Country!
Posts: 3,221
Sounds like you have some good recovery going on there.... despite your sister's relapse, you are staying strong.
I admire your dad for dropping the bf off somewhere else. Could have been a big bunch of chaos... instead, it just "was".
(((hugs)))
Keep posting - lots of us in the boat with you.
I admire your dad for dropping the bf off somewhere else. Could have been a big bunch of chaos... instead, it just "was".
(((hugs)))
Keep posting - lots of us in the boat with you.
Hug giver-outer!
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: The State of Possibilities
Posts: 533
Lots of hugs! 
It's such a tough thing to do, to be strong for yourself, but you must. Losing more people to the behavior of addiction even when they are not addicts, is such a real tragedy.
It's such a tough thing to do, to be strong for yourself, but you must. Losing more people to the behavior of addiction even when they are not addicts, is such a real tragedy.
Administrator
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: a better place
Posts: 4,047
My mom broke down and said she doesn't know how to take care of herself when her daughter is so messed up and can't care for her own child. I suggested she come with me to a meeting and find some more support. Unfortunately, so many people have been through it, too.
I'm sorry your sister is back into the madness and I pray for her little one and for all of you. Hugs
Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: NY
Posts: 204
I've been there as well with my xhb and my sister, thankfully they are both clean today, but the fear is always there, you just have to try not to let it consume you.
I know it's difficult when there are children involved. My sister had 3 kids at time and her hb is not such a great guy, no drugs, but just very irresponsible.
My mom went through a lot with my sister, my dad was the enabler, I was able to get my mom to a few Al-anon meetings but eventually she caught on, got stronger and started to really care for herself. She joined Weight Watchers and in a year lost 72 lbs, she quit smoking (3 years ago) and now she's even going to the gym. I watch my mom and I am so proud of how she's come through everything, my dad is sort of an easy going person, he isn't the type that needs much support, he too eventually learned to let go of my sister's problems and live life. They both know that at anytime it could fall apart but my mom is insistent she would be just fine.
Take care of yourself and just be there for each other, it's all you can do.
I know it's difficult when there are children involved. My sister had 3 kids at time and her hb is not such a great guy, no drugs, but just very irresponsible.
My mom went through a lot with my sister, my dad was the enabler, I was able to get my mom to a few Al-anon meetings but eventually she caught on, got stronger and started to really care for herself. She joined Weight Watchers and in a year lost 72 lbs, she quit smoking (3 years ago) and now she's even going to the gym. I watch my mom and I am so proud of how she's come through everything, my dad is sort of an easy going person, he isn't the type that needs much support, he too eventually learned to let go of my sister's problems and live life. They both know that at anytime it could fall apart but my mom is insistent she would be just fine.
Take care of yourself and just be there for each other, it's all you can do.
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