Louise54

I'm new to this forum, but not new to SR, as I also have an RAS. But here I sit at 5:00 in the morning still waiting for my husband to get home. I'm really sick of this. It has been going on for over 2 years now. His company is going out of business and he's having trouble dealing with it, so this is what he does. He stops off and on and swears up and down he'll never do it again, but it only lasts for a couple of weeks.

Most times he'll get home at a reasonable hour, only because I have his debit card. But, alas, I forgot to get it from him before he went out (first he went out on a sales call), but now it's turned into an all nighter. Between him and my ras, (who I still worry about), I'm at my wits end. Husband has just started seeing a therapist, but I almost had to force him to go. The thing is, he can go for a couple of days without drinking anything, but once he gets started, (mostly when he's out by himself), he doesn't know when to stop.

I don't really know how many more nights of this I can take. He won't do it again this week, and he'll be apologetic all day tomorrow and swear he'll never go out by himself again. But when next week comes, the whole cycle starts again.

Thanks for letting me vent.

Kitty86

You just reminded me of my situation. Mark works as a gas engineer but because he is still training he doesn't get paid alot and its a very stressful job (or so he says). When he comes home he says he needs a drink to help him relax.

Mark to comes home at a reasonable time mst days he just has the odd day when I have to drag him out at 3 or 4 am. I have packed his bags and told his mum to come get him but he has cried and cried and silly me I forgave him. Then 2 weeks later I find out he went to the pub before coming home. Yes he drunk and drove. Then asked if he could go for an hour, which he did come back after the hour and I was so proud of him but then to find out he lie I felt betrayed and he can't understand why I am so hurt.

I have tried to take his card of him and his wallet but he goes and borrows money or gets a tab at the pub. Because of his drinking he was in 700pound worth of dept i gave his card to his mum and now its down to about 100pound but when he gets the card back I just know what he will do.

denny57

AH also began seeing a therapist. I realize now he was looking for a way to solve all his other problems and still drink. That didn't work, so he stopped seeing her.

kj21

I also have my AH card. He asked me 2 years ago to hold onto it so he is not tempted. He still finds a way to get money, borrows, goes directly to the bank before closing, all of this just adds to his lying, it did not stop him from drinking or drugging. Now I am thinking why do I need to hold on to a grown mans money. my kids are more trustworthy than him when it comes to spending.
But I won't give it back to him now becouse I do not want him to have access to our account, that is where all our bills and morgage come out of. sounds so stupid!