Day 5 and tougher...
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2006
Posts: 1,397
Day 5 and tougher...
this time around. I was so resolved the last time I decided to stop that I made it to almost a month with just a few passing difficult moments, but this time is totally different. Last night I was simply dying for a drink. I put off the craving until about 9PM (they always start late afternoon) even with my husband drinking in front of me, and then I said to hell with it and decided to make a martini. Luckily for me, my husband had already finished the last of the vodka. I was angry, opened the cabinet and debated pouring a glass of something else. I didn't.
This time I'm so incredibly irritable, snapping at everyone and everything. I've begun to dread waking up every day. Knowing I can't drink has me miserable. I keep trying to remind myself how miserable I am AFTER drinking, and how much more I'll appreciate life once I'm sober for a longer time.
I was on Lexapro for a while, which worked wonders for the depression. I ended up gained about 40 lbs, though, and my blood pressure became an issue. I'm considering meds again, but don't want the weight gain. Tried Wellbutrin but found mself wanting to drive myself and my car into trees!
Anyway -- feeling the way I do right now, I know that tonight will be tough. I thought I'd come here to vent a bit...
My husband will be coming in any moment with a new bottle and I do and DON'T want it. AAAAGGGHHHH!!!!!
Thanks for listening.
This time I'm so incredibly irritable, snapping at everyone and everything. I've begun to dread waking up every day. Knowing I can't drink has me miserable. I keep trying to remind myself how miserable I am AFTER drinking, and how much more I'll appreciate life once I'm sober for a longer time.
I was on Lexapro for a while, which worked wonders for the depression. I ended up gained about 40 lbs, though, and my blood pressure became an issue. I'm considering meds again, but don't want the weight gain. Tried Wellbutrin but found mself wanting to drive myself and my car into trees!
Anyway -- feeling the way I do right now, I know that tonight will be tough. I thought I'd come here to vent a bit...
My husband will be coming in any moment with a new bottle and I do and DON'T want it. AAAAGGGHHHH!!!!!
Thanks for listening.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2003
Posts: 12,136
Hey New Leaf,
It's good to see you. Would your husband consider not bringing booze in the house? Doesn't he see how much harder it is on you when he does? I would find that really hard.
If you think you need meds, talk to your doc. There are many anti d's and not all cause weight gain.
When your husband gets home, can you go out for a while?
You really need to do something you enjoy, even if it's only to distract you from drinking. Can you go for a walk? Visit a friend? Go to a movie?
Don't give in - you already how to think the drink through, and you know it doesn't solve anything long-term.
It's good to see you. Would your husband consider not bringing booze in the house? Doesn't he see how much harder it is on you when he does? I would find that really hard.
If you think you need meds, talk to your doc. There are many anti d's and not all cause weight gain.
When your husband gets home, can you go out for a while?
You really need to do something you enjoy, even if it's only to distract you from drinking. Can you go for a walk? Visit a friend? Go to a movie?
Don't give in - you already how to think the drink through, and you know it doesn't solve anything long-term.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2006
Posts: 1,397
Hi Rowan.
No booze in the house will never happen. He enjoys it too much and although he knows it's so hard for me, the most he can do is say sorry. I've tried to convince him to not drink with me during the week to lose weight, and he can't make it for any longer than a few days. Part of me wonders if, he too, may have a problem he doesn't want to see or admit. I'm really not sure.
Anyway -- I may be able to go out. Sad thing is -- the only time I get to see him in the evenings, he's got a drink in his hand. During the days, he's out -- even most weekends.
Oh well.
I will try, though. I know you're right.
No booze in the house will never happen. He enjoys it too much and although he knows it's so hard for me, the most he can do is say sorry. I've tried to convince him to not drink with me during the week to lose weight, and he can't make it for any longer than a few days. Part of me wonders if, he too, may have a problem he doesn't want to see or admit. I'm really not sure.
Anyway -- I may be able to go out. Sad thing is -- the only time I get to see him in the evenings, he's got a drink in his hand. During the days, he's out -- even most weekends.
Oh well.
I will try, though. I know you're right.
believer
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Europe
Posts: 2,411
Hey, i've lost years and years doing other things...All i can tell you is don't waist your precious life, don't let it go to a place too far...ok?
take care of yourself...your health is first than any conventional need for alcohol, that is bull, compared to the reality life faces..He should get that....
take care of yourself...your health is first than any conventional need for alcohol, that is bull, compared to the reality life faces..He should get that....
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2006
Posts: 1,397
Hi Laurenlanai25 
I actually checked. Part of my problem is that I drop off and pick kids up most nights. The only meeting around her begins at 8 and I need to pick up at 8:30.
The nights the kids aren't right around the corner are always better. I always volunteer to drive so I'm forced to watch their soccer, riding lesson, rehearal, etc. rather than being home drinking.
I tried going to a 10am meeting this past week (Monday, in fact) and couldn't find the location. I'll be looking into that one more, later.
Anyway -- he just walked in with the bag of new stuff. Posting's helped, though.
Thanks.
I actually checked. Part of my problem is that I drop off and pick kids up most nights. The only meeting around her begins at 8 and I need to pick up at 8:30.
The nights the kids aren't right around the corner are always better. I always volunteer to drive so I'm forced to watch their soccer, riding lesson, rehearal, etc. rather than being home drinking.
I tried going to a 10am meeting this past week (Monday, in fact) and couldn't find the location. I'll be looking into that one more, later.
Anyway -- he just walked in with the bag of new stuff. Posting's helped, though.
Thanks.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2006
Posts: 1,397
Hi Dee --
Just posted there, as a matter of fact! ...just busting Gypsy's shoes, yanking her chain...
Anyway -- I'm going to sign off right now and get to bed while I'm happy.
Being here got me there...
Thanks, and Good Night.
L
Just posted there, as a matter of fact! ...just busting Gypsy's shoes, yanking her chain...
Anyway -- I'm going to sign off right now and get to bed while I'm happy.
Being here got me there...
Thanks, and Good Night.
L
trying to get it..
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: California
Posts: 286
hang in there..it does get batter...the effects linger for a while and that’s natural......it happened to me..I shook off most of the obvious effects at about day 14 ........hang tough...
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,511
Hi New Leaf,
You're doing well! I remember feeling just like you do and being convinced things would never change. But, I found that each time I got through an episode like that, the next one was just a little bit easier. I don't think there's any way around it - just hang on and get through it. As for the meds, if you need them, don't give up on that either. It took me several tries to get a med that worked for me, but it was worth it in the end.
You're doing well! I remember feeling just like you do and being convinced things would never change. But, I found that each time I got through an episode like that, the next one was just a little bit easier. I don't think there's any way around it - just hang on and get through it. As for the meds, if you need them, don't give up on that either. It took me several tries to get a med that worked for me, but it was worth it in the end.
not a greeter
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: padmasana
Posts: 13,927
Hey ! I feel like the stone of Newleaf's thread. What's going on here 
?
How are you doing today Newleaf ? That's hard having someone that drinks in the house while you're trying to quit. I don't know what to tell you except that you can only control you and what you do and don't do. You don't have to drink just because it's there... the temptation does sick ass though. Stick around sr if you can't or don't go to meetings. It helps.
? How are you doing today Newleaf ? That's hard having someone that drinks in the house while you're trying to quit. I don't know what to tell you except that you can only control you and what you do and don't do. You don't have to drink just because it's there... the temptation does sick ass though. Stick around sr if you can't or don't go to meetings. It helps
. 
simplysober
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 118
hi new leaf
im on day 6, i am sorry that you have so much temptation in a place that should be a safe haven for you. Im always on late, cant sleep lately- hang in there and you will make it, there is so much support here
hugs
maria
im on day 6, i am sorry that you have so much temptation in a place that should be a safe haven for you. Im always on late, cant sleep lately- hang in there and you will make it, there is so much support here
hugs
maria
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