Dream2bClean

I have been struggeling with addiction for over the last ten years. I am what I have learned to be a functioning alcoholic/addict. I was on this sight over 3 years ago when I was in NA and got 30 day about 4 times but other than that that is all. Both of my parents are alcoholics and my husband does what he does, I have learned not to try to decide for him if he has a problem but I know that he supports me in whatever I do but it is not the type of support I need when I try to stop everything. 1 year ago( minus 2 weeks) I had a baby girl and for the nine months up to that I did not take one sip of any beer or did I take one pill and I was happier than ever in my life. After I had her I thought I would never drink again and especially do any type of drugs. In the hospital they gace me pain pills which I have never cared for vefore and although I was not in pain I took them and they gave me super energy so when I got home I could do every thing I needed to for my baby and I ended up getting refil after refil back to my old ways knowing that no Dr's office especially one as big as mine is going to tell a newmother in pain that I could not have anohter refil on top of that my husband had an endless supply of hydrocodone form the internet. About 1 moth ago we decided no more pills and it has been very hard on him b/c he was taking uo to over 10 a day and I was just taking 1-2 and I hurt terribley when stopping. He had to do to the Dr to get Subutex so that hiw withdrawels would not be so bad and he could continue to work. I started sniffing the stuff, I have no idea why or where I ever got the idea but I really liked it and did it for 2 weeks straight and every at work feels very bady for the sinus problems I have b/c of the smog htis summer. Well Friday was my last day doing that and it was supposed to be drinking as well but I did great yesterday, I went to AA for the first time got phone #'s form mostly old ladies that I could never picture myself calling. All day yesterday I read a lot here and wathced a movie and did not take a pill or drink and hen today after my husband left for work I told mydelf to pick uop the phone and call one of the numbers I got but I didnt I drank and took a few pills a fell asleep w/ my babyt woke up and am now feeling quite sober and threw away my one day sober which doest seem like much but it was a very hard day and I had gotten through it and now I am back to where I was before.

I guess what I want to know if what do you say when you call a # you get from someone @ AA what do you or they say? I am not a big tlaker on the phone i think I woulod do much better if we exchanged email addresses. I remember when I tried NA a few timed years ago I called a couple of people a couple of times there were these long times of silence on the phone and I didnt know whatto say and I hated it. That is why I am scared to call one of the #'s I got in AA b/c I dont want to bother anyone and am afraid they wont say anything and I will be expected to start the conversation and that scarers me.

So after one day of not drinking today I drank a few beers it so wasnt worht it and I wanted to call someone but I didnt want to bother anyone on a Sunday afternoon, I am sure these poeple were doing things with their families. If I call them what should I say? I can really get to meeting b/c my husband and I work opposite shifts and I have NO childcare when he is not home. The ladies at the meeting say it is OK to bring her but she is really fiesty righ now and likes he rroutine and I cant imagine bringong her and interrupting the meeting, the last thig I want to do is draw attention to myself.

Please answer these quesitons for me and let me know what you think I should do.

Thanks

nogard

I had a real problem calling members, so my sponsor got me to call three members every day and just say hello and get used to doing it. After a few days I did and I felt awkard the first few times but it got easier and have made friends out of that. Now when I need to call someone I don't have any thoughts or excuses day or night I just ring.

Thats what the Numbers are for want2be, to be used, so I suggest you call three members each day and at first say; "hi I am calling you to practice calling members" that will do.

Good luck

Kevin

Rusty Zipper

W2, kevin said it best!

try to get in the habit of making phone calls...

my sponser said... call me before you drink, not after...! ugh...

good wishes W2

xxoo, rz

Anna

Hi,

I am glad that you're reaching out and searching for answers. I am not an AA person and I would not like to phone people either, but I do know that recovery is hard. I will PM my email address to you and you email or PM me anytime. I'm always around.

Rowan

I hate talking on the phone, but do it when I absolutely must.

I'll PM you my email addy also - usually around if you need someone to talk to.

Keep coming - don't give up.

Rowan