Language of Letting Go - August 12
Nature Girl
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Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
Language of Letting Go - August 12
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go
Directness
Direct people are a joy to be around.
We never have to guess what they're really thinking or feeling, because they're honest about their thoughts and openly express their feelings.
We never have to wonder if they're with us because they want to be, or if they're there out of guilt and obligation.
When they do something for us, we don't have to worry whether they'll end up resenting us because direct people generally do things that please themselves.
We don't have to fuss about the status of our relationship because if we ask, they'll tell us.
We don't have to worry if they're angry because they deal openly with their anger and resolve it quickly.
We don't have to ponder whether they are talking about us behind our backs because if they have something to say, it will be said to us directly.
We don't have to wonder if we can rely on them because direct people are trustworthy.
Wouldn't it be nice if we were all direct?
Today, I will let go of my notions that it is somehow good or desirable to be indirect. Instead, I will strive for honesty, directness, and clarity in my communication. I will let directness in my relationships begin with me.
From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©1990, Hazelden Foundation.
Directness
Direct people are a joy to be around.
We never have to guess what they're really thinking or feeling, because they're honest about their thoughts and openly express their feelings.
We never have to wonder if they're with us because they want to be, or if they're there out of guilt and obligation.
When they do something for us, we don't have to worry whether they'll end up resenting us because direct people generally do things that please themselves.
We don't have to fuss about the status of our relationship because if we ask, they'll tell us.
We don't have to worry if they're angry because they deal openly with their anger and resolve it quickly.
We don't have to ponder whether they are talking about us behind our backs because if they have something to say, it will be said to us directly.
We don't have to wonder if we can rely on them because direct people are trustworthy.
Wouldn't it be nice if we were all direct?
Today, I will let go of my notions that it is somehow good or desirable to be indirect. Instead, I will strive for honesty, directness, and clarity in my communication. I will let directness in my relationships begin with me.
From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©1990, Hazelden Foundation.
Nature Girl
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
Funny how these readings seem to appear with topics that I need to see each day.
I have a meeting tomorrow that requires input from me on what I see as being needed and where I see myself and my contribution in the big picture. I have hesitated to put together what I need to say because it may not be what they want to hear, yet I know that professionally it would be what is right for them and right for me at the same time.
This reading reminds me that it's okay to just tell it like I see it, it's okay to just be honest about what I want in my career, even if it means moving on to other contracts. If it's not working for me, it's probably not working for them. And being honest about that will take me back to a place where I want to be in my business and in the long run make my life happier.
Just for today I will write out what I need to say, and I will be direct about my own needs as well as what I professionally see their needs to be. If they don't work well together, I will simply help us both move on and work with them through the transition.
What a load off my mind this all is. Another gift of recovery...clarity.
Hugs
I have a meeting tomorrow that requires input from me on what I see as being needed and where I see myself and my contribution in the big picture. I have hesitated to put together what I need to say because it may not be what they want to hear, yet I know that professionally it would be what is right for them and right for me at the same time.
This reading reminds me that it's okay to just tell it like I see it, it's okay to just be honest about what I want in my career, even if it means moving on to other contracts. If it's not working for me, it's probably not working for them. And being honest about that will take me back to a place where I want to be in my business and in the long run make my life happier.
Just for today I will write out what I need to say, and I will be direct about my own needs as well as what I professionally see their needs to be. If they don't work well together, I will simply help us both move on and work with them through the transition.
What a load off my mind this all is. Another gift of recovery...clarity.
Hugs
Member
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: NJ
Posts: 702
Thanks Ann,
I have been putting talking to some people because I was afraid of hurting them. I know I need to be more direct for me, to let people know when something is bothering me. I agree dolly look out world here I come.
I have been putting talking to some people because I was afraid of hurting them. I know I need to be more direct for me, to let people know when something is bothering me. I agree dolly look out world here I come.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2007
Posts: 472
Just what I needed to read-get my focus reset again!!!! Been a few tough days here but doing ok. Mybe once the druggies move-by the 1st-out of site-out of mind. Will not see being AH in my truck going to to get or deliver drugs. He actually drove my friends house last night with a ton of people-waving and shouting at her. He had no reason to be there other than another way to try to hurt me. Really doubt I hear from him since he got sooo updet reading WHAT ADDICTS DO!!!! Maybe some piece for a while. So much work to be done-men work(he never did for 2 yrs) but too hot here-well into the 100s every day. Thanks!!!!!!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Colorado
Posts: 161
You know it is funny - I am known for being so direct on this board, to my close friends and in our business but when it comes to a couple of people, my husband and a few others - I still wrestle with being direct in a non hurtful way because am I am still afraid at times I will loose something or someone that I am afraid I can not live with out. Even though I have SO much proof to the opposite - wether it is having survived loss before or knowing that I don't really need that person in my life...
Thanks for posting Ann. I hadn't gotten to my book this morning.....
Thanks for posting Ann. I hadn't gotten to my book this morning.....
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