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No more ‘life’ getting in the way of ‘living’



No more ‘life’ getting in the way of ‘living’

Old 08-07-2007, 10:10 AM
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No more ‘life’ getting in the way of ‘living’

This may be the ‘corniest’ post I’ve ever done, but here it goes anyway...

Phases of my life:

First Phase: birth to late teens: brainwashed, physically abused, and severely and emotionally damaged by two incompetent, and emotionally void people. One was ’explosively violent and verbally cruel’ while the other was ’so beyond passive’, why bother to exist? Both should have been neutered and not allowed to reproduce/raise children (in my opinion)!

Second Phase: from early 20’s to mid 40’s: Unconsciously seeking and repeating the ‘familiar’ pattern of my upbringing, never knowing why. Found myself immersed in toxic relationships whether it be romantic or just plain friendship. Those that inhabited my world needed a doormat, and I being born and bred to be one, took whatever was dished out or wiped on me! Was it my choice? I don't think so. How can it be a real choice if you just don’t know any different?

Third Phase: From mid to late 40’s: Was finally brought to my knees in despair ‘till something in me screamed ‘no more!’ I reviewed each and every person in my life, and, most of them have been eliminated. Of course, I started weeding through my own behavior as well. That’s where it all had to begin…with ‘me’ first!

Last Phase: Late 40’s (today) and for however much time is left in my life: IS ALL MINE!!!!!

Through music , poetry, nature, and a safe, serene, and healthy home environment that “I“ have created, I have learned to give myself the childhood that I always longed for but never had! Whoever says you can’t miss what you never had is seriously mistaken! I’ve learned that if I want to know what love is, if I want to be loved, I have to love myself. No more compromises, no settling, no selling myself short.

The only people that will be allowed in my life are the ones that will ‘enhance it’. No more room for the ranks of the ‘strictly takers’ here anymore folks. You might get ‘some of my sweat’, and maybe a little bit of ‘my tears’, but I’m keeping my blood for it’s vital to my healthy existence!

To celebrate the rejoining the ranks of the living again, with the same ‘species’ as myself, I have 3 concerts I’m going to, with related parties and reunions throughout this upcoming weekend and into next week. And, I won backstage passes and will once again, meet Kenny Loggins after his shows and attend his sound check (rehearsal) prior to the shows. May not sound like much to some, but to me, it’s a sign…..welcome back to the land of the ‘living’…..’nurture yourself’, “this is just the beginning”!

I am just so done with ‘life’ getting in the way of ‘living’...it doesn't work for me, and it never really did!
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Old 08-07-2007, 10:13 AM
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Great post! Thanks for sharing - and congratulations. I like living, too.
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Old 08-07-2007, 10:24 AM
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Last Phase: Late 40’s (today) and for however much time is left in my life: IS ALL MINE!!!!!

I am just so done with ‘life’ getting in the way of ‘living’...it doesn't work for me, and it never really did!
Awesome ICU! Not corny at all!!!
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Old 08-07-2007, 10:53 AM
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Corny? How about INSPIRATIONAL!! Thanks for sharing ICU!
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Old 08-07-2007, 11:32 AM
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"The only people that will be allowed in my life are the ones that will ‘enhance it’. "

I will keep telling myself that too. In fact, with your permission, ICU, I want to make it my signature line in here. May I please?

ARL
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Old 08-07-2007, 07:38 PM
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Wow ICU, what an awesome post. I love it, and that line that ARealLady pointed out is perfect.

Mike
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Old 08-07-2007, 07:44 PM
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Not corny at all!!!!
You sound great!
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Old 08-07-2007, 07:50 PM
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Wowie girl! You're bustin loose and on your way!!! You are an inspiration.
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Old 08-07-2007, 07:57 PM
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ICU Congrats!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm an in-the-closet loggins fan. That's awesome! Your HP is really shining bright enough for the blindest of codies to see
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Old 08-08-2007, 06:19 AM
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Thanks everyone.

I've been fighting my way out of a major 'funk' for the last couple of months. Every once in awhile, the sun would start to shine, but would then seem to disappear once I tried to grab for it. It was very frustrating to say the least.

I had to get to the point where I accepted that the past is the past. And if the past is still bothering me, then I'm the one doing it to myself this time. I've learned from the past, and made major changes, but how about now? Where am I today? Am I 'living' or just playing it safe? Well, I was playing it 'safe'; a little 'too safe'! That became unacceptable to me. So, I guess it's time to start 'living' again.

The upcoming concerts and passes are rewards, or rather, 'signs' that I'm on the right track now. And, I'm going to meet a ton of new people at these shows. These are people I've been in touch with for the past couple of months via the internet, so I know we already have a lot in common.

I can honestly say I haven't been this excited about 'living' again in such a very long time. It's a rush for sure!

ARealLady: Sure you can use that line. I'm touched that it speaks to you.

Cagefree: Why don't you join us at some of his concerts? He's in MASS and CT beginning to mid of this week. Then he'll be in my neck of the woods Jersey/PA later this week and into next.
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Old 08-08-2007, 06:52 AM
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Originally Posted by ICU View Post
Thanks everyone.

I've been fighting my way out of a major 'funk' for the last couple of months. Every once in awhile, the sun would start to shine, but would then seem to disappear once I tried to grab for it. It was very frustrating to say the least.

I had to get to the point where I accepted that the past is the past. And if the past is still bothering me, then I'm the one doing it to myself this time. I've learned from the past, and made major changes, but how about now? Where am I today? Am I 'living' or just playing it safe? Well, I was playing it 'safe'; a little 'too safe'! That became unacceptable to me. So, I guess it's time to start 'living' again.

The upcoming concerts and passes are rewards, or rather, 'signs' that I'm on the right track now. And, I'm going to meet a ton of new people at these shows. These are people I've been in touch with for the past couple of months via the internet, so I know we already have a lot in common.

I can honestly say I haven't been this excited about 'living' again in such a very long time. It's a rush for sure!

ARealLady: Sure you can use that line. I'm touched that it speaks to you.

Cagefree: Why don't you join us at some of his concerts? He's in MASS and CT beginning to mid of this week. Then he'll be in my neck of the woods Jersey/PA later this week and into next.

You are such an inspiration ICU!

I think that is where I'am at "Playing it safe" and I'm working on LIVING again! It is starting to feel better every day!

Hmmmmm
I've been working so hard
I'm punching my card
Eight hours for what?
Oh, tell me what I got
I've got this feeling
That times's just holding me down
I'll hit the ceiling or else
I'll tear up this town

Now I gotta cut loose
1-Footloose, kick off the Sunday shoes
Please, Louise, pull me off of my knees
Jack, get Mack, come on before we crack
Lose your blues, everybody cut footloose...You're playing so cool, obeying every rule
Deep way down in your heart
You're burning yearning for the sun
Somebody to tell you that life ain't passing you by
I'm trying to tell you
It will if you don't even try
You'll get by if you'd only

Cut loose, footloose, kick off the Sunday shoes
Oo-wee Marie shake it, shake it for me
Woah, Milo come on, come on let's go
Lose your blues, everybody cut footloose...

You got to turn me around...and put your
Feet on the ground, gotta take the hold of all
I'm turning loose
Must say I'm guilty of liking the Loggins dude too!
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Old 08-08-2007, 08:48 AM
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I'm alright
Nobody worry 'bout me
Why you got to gimme a fight?
Can't you just let it be?

You sound good
Hope you have a great time at the shows!
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Old 08-08-2007, 10:40 AM
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Ahhh! A 'Loggins' group sing-a-long! I love it. I know for sure he'll be doing both of those 2 songs in his shows! (I've got the inside scoop!!!!)

If I can figure it out, I'll try to be brave enough to post a picture of he and I together backstage.

Hmmm...second thought, maybe I'll post the group picture of him with all of us and see if you can figure out which one is me!

When there's no sex in the forseeable future....'ya gotta do 'something' that gets your motor running again, 'ya know?
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Old 08-08-2007, 10:48 AM
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Originally Posted by ICU View Post
Ahhh! A 'Loggins' group sing-a-long! I love it. I know for sure he'll be doing both of those 2 songs in his shows! (I've got the inside scoop!!!!)

If I can figure it out, I'll try to be brave enough to post a picture of he and I together backstage.

Hmmm...second thought, maybe I'll post the group picture of him with all of us and see if you can figure out which one is me!

When there's no sex in the forseeable future....'ya gotta do 'something' that gets your motor running again, 'ya know?


ICU your too funny! You go!
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Old 08-08-2007, 11:56 AM
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Thank-you

Your post really struck a chord within me....You could be me....or I could be you...this is my first time posting here although I have "lurked" often. It has helped me tremendously knowing that other people have overcome some of the same obstacles I am facing now. I left my Ah almost 7 weeks ago after 20 years of a living hell. I too started cutting people out of my life that had a negative influence. I, unfortunately, am still in a very depressed state of mind and your post gives me some hope for light at the end of the tunnel. Thank-you! And have FUN at those concerts!
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Old 08-08-2007, 11:58 AM
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let it grow!
 
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so not corny...thank you, k
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Old 08-08-2007, 12:23 PM
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Originally Posted by 2Growstrong View Post
I, unfortunately, am still in a very depressed state of mind and your post gives me some hope for light at the end of the tunnel.
2Growstrong, Welcome to SR! I'm so glad you decided to post.

It does help when someone can show you that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. So many people here have shown me that too (but I didn't really believe them at the time) LOL! It just takes each of us our own amount of time before we can do just that. I've gone from the light to the darkness and back again over, and over, and over! I'm hoping the light sticks around for a little while longer.

Please feel free to begin a new post so that we may get to know you and your situation a little better.

Again, welcome to SR! And thanks! I know I'll enjoy the concerts!!
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Old 08-08-2007, 05:43 PM
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Originally Posted by ICU View Post
...maybe I'll post the group picture of him with all of us and see if you can figure out which one is me!...
toooooooo easy You'll be the one with the _biggest_ smile

Mike
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