Stacy76

I have a husband who has been using drugs for almost 12 years and is an alcoholic. Is choice drug used to be cocaine and now is crack. Just recently he decided he wants to change his life and get clean. He went 2 night's at home clean and then the 3rd night he went out and drank and again last night. My question is will he ever get clean considering he's still wanting to drink? It seems all his wrong decisions come from when he's been drinking. I believe he remained off the drugs both nights but I really don't even know. His reasoning for continueing drinking is that he loves the taste, but he knows he's an alcoholic and it runs in his family.
Please tell me what you think.

Debbie

Hi Stacy

My opinion (and its only my opinion), he doesn't want to stop, he's not ready to stop and won't stop if he doesn't think he has a problem.

Every time my hubby relapses I can't help but ask, "Why did you drink?". I get many excuses - Because everyone else was! I thought I could handle just one. (Yes and the one leads to a fifth).

His drinking always brings trouble and you think they would know by now. I have a little hope left that he will stop but I think he may just be one of those people who "can't or won't".

So, with the excuses and reasoning from the hubby (yours and mine), he's not stopping. I hope he will but personally I have almost resigned myself that he will never.

I am sure this isn't something you want to hear, I kind of just took my breath away typing it. It's so very sad.

You take care.
Many hugs,
Debbie

Jon

Run. Run away now.

Stacey, please take some time to read through the AA and NA forums. Quite possibly you'll see your husband in the stories. The fact is, "clean" does not include alcohol, therefore he isn't clean.

I guarantee you that it will be a very short time before he picks up his drug of choice again. Thats how we do it. Always have, always will.

I wish I had something positive to say about your post. Unfortunately I can't.

So be careful, and take care of you...

EmotionalMeg

Hi Stacy,
So glad you found us . Yup, you belong here... in fact, my husband is an alcoholic who also used cocaine and more recently crack. For years he KNEW he had a problem... we'd talk about it, he TRIED to abstain and eventually went back to using time and time again. One time, he drove home so drunk he ended up in the ditch; that got him sober for 3 weeks. One time I left him... that got him in a treatment centre and sober for 3 months. The last time he used, I kicked him out, took away all access to personal AND business money, and he has been sober for just over a month. He goes to meetings and sees a councellor... but as much as he WANTS to stay sober, there are NO guaruntees. I have heard stories of A's who stay sober for as much as 9 years, and then slip. And the ONLY way I survive these days, is opening myself up to Alanon, and discovering my HP.
There is so much to learn about MY part in this disease... about YOUR part. How much you are NOT responsible for! Once you begin the process of taking care of YOURSELF, you'll never look back (well, you might peek ).
Anyhow, keep coming here, and get to a face to face Alanon meeting if u can.
Meg

Tigeress

I used to do drugs and quit because I failed the drug test at work and they gave me another chance. I continued to drink for 5 more years but, never went back to my drug of choice cocaine(in any form). I stayed away from people who did it. I still think about it as I do about drinks. It's been 32 weeks today. It's all in the person what you can stop...my addiction is still eating, eating and more eating but, I learned to control that too. I lost 57 pounds!! It's harder to stop than stopping drugs and alcohol for me. Keep coming here. It's helped me. Even to lighten up the subject and get a few laughs about it.:p