Rock bottom or new beginning??
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: here
Posts: 65
Rock bottom or new beginning??
Hi all,
it's great to be able to communicate wth others in recovery. I hae just been to my first two AA meetings this week.
I was amazed at the many ways i identified with the members but the one thing i don't have in common with them is rock bottom.
Many of the other members have been incarcerated, ost jobs, home, family and slept on the streets.
I have had many problems in my life with alcohol and have lost and alienated many people through my behaviour when drunk.
While i am not judging the others who have been throuh more in fact i admire them all the more for going through what they have gone through it makes me feel that i have no right to be at the same meeting as those people. It is like going to hospital with a broken finger alongside someone with a missing limb.
What do you think? All advice comments appreciated.
it's great to be able to communicate wth others in recovery. I hae just been to my first two AA meetings this week.
I was amazed at the many ways i identified with the members but the one thing i don't have in common with them is rock bottom.
Many of the other members have been incarcerated, ost jobs, home, family and slept on the streets.
I have had many problems in my life with alcohol and have lost and alienated many people through my behaviour when drunk.
While i am not judging the others who have been throuh more in fact i admire them all the more for going through what they have gone through it makes me feel that i have no right to be at the same meeting as those people. It is like going to hospital with a broken finger alongside someone with a missing limb.
What do you think? All advice comments appreciated.
Its_me_jen
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Salina, Ks
Posts: 8,547
Well, you've had problems in your life because of alcohol. That's enough. I never lost a job or family, got a DUI, or been arrested but I had issues for sure. I was headed down that path. I was lucky that I realized it before I got there. You should be too.
You deserve to be there just like everyone else. Unless of course, you want to just keep on drinking and see how bad it can get. I don't think that's what you want to do though.
Welcome to SR. Glad you're here.
You deserve to be there just like everyone else. Unless of course, you want to just keep on drinking and see how bad it can get. I don't think that's what you want to do though.
Welcome to SR. Glad you're here.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: UK
Posts: 18,299
I used to feel like that sometimes but all those people would have loved to have quit sooner than they did.
They will all be rooting for you to 'get it' sooner rather than later so you dont have to go through all that stuff.
What is it 'they' say? Just add a 'yet' to those things--you havent lost a job 'yet' etc.
They will all be rooting for you to 'get it' sooner rather than later so you dont have to go through all that stuff.
What is it 'they' say? Just add a 'yet' to those things--you havent lost a job 'yet' etc.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,475
I believe that with addiction, it is just a matter of 'not yet'. Addiction is a progressive disease and it will get worse unless it's stopped.
Neither have I have those things happen to me, but I am absolutely no different than any of those people.
And, when I walk along the street in my city and see the homeless people drinking out of bottles in brown paper bags, I know I was but a breath away from being there too.
Neither have I have those things happen to me, but I am absolutely no different than any of those people.
And, when I walk along the street in my city and see the homeless people drinking out of bottles in brown paper bags, I know I was but a breath away from being there too.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Murrieta, Ca
Posts: 2,683
Rock Bottom is in your heart. It's when you've had enough, regardless of you circumstances.
Know also that these things haven't happened to you YET. Keep drinking, and that
s what you get to look forward to.
Know also that these things haven't happened to you YET. Keep drinking, and that
s what you get to look forward to.
Belgian Sheepdog Adictee
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: In Today
Posts: 6,101
Welcome to SR. You will find lots of great Experience, Strength and Hope (ES&H) here.
I was always wondering why I was so stupid and it took me so much longer than folks like you who figured it out sooner and didn't lose everything, lol
As has been said above.......................if alcohol is causing a problem in your life then you have earned your seat.
Welcome to recovery!
Love and hugs,
While i am not judging the others who have been throuh more in fact i admire them all the more for going through what they have gone through it makes me feel that i have no right to be at the same meeting as those people. It is like going to hospital with a broken finger alongside someone with a missing limb.
As has been said above.......................if alcohol is causing a problem in your life then you have earned your seat.
Welcome to recovery!
Love and hugs,
Member
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Kentucky
Posts: 36
There have been times that I felt the very same way, but every one's rock bottom is different. Just be thankful that you hadn't gotten to the point of some of the others in your meeting.
I was in recovery and relapsed and this time my situation and circumstances were worse. It's a progressive disease therefore it will always get worse. Just remember that you are lucky that you are able to begin recovery now. Everyone here and in your meetings are here to support you regardless of what the effects of your addition have been. I will keep you in my thoughts.
I was in recovery and relapsed and this time my situation and circumstances were worse. It's a progressive disease therefore it will always get worse. Just remember that you are lucky that you are able to begin recovery now. Everyone here and in your meetings are here to support you regardless of what the effects of your addition have been. I will keep you in my thoughts.
same planet...different world
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Butte, America
Posts: 10,946
hi verity -
I think I know what you're saying - I think it's something I also experienced when I first came to the Fellowship.
I was overwhelmed on occasion that HP had spared me, when others right beside me had been through so very much more pain and hardship from this disease that I thought I had.
I think the word is humility.
"We lose interest in ourselves, and gain interest in others"
And - I had every bit the difficulty articulating it.
One thing I say often that I'll share here -
There's not a single person in a single room in the Fellowshipof AA worldwide ....
who got there because they were doing well.
I think I know what you're saying - I think it's something I also experienced when I first came to the Fellowship.
I was overwhelmed on occasion that HP had spared me, when others right beside me had been through so very much more pain and hardship from this disease that I thought I had.
I think the word is humility.
"We lose interest in ourselves, and gain interest in others"
And - I had every bit the difficulty articulating it.
One thing I say often that I'll share here -
There's not a single person in a single room in the Fellowshipof AA worldwide ....
who got there because they were doing well.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: my room in ct.
Posts: 58,110
BD bottom line...
me, my shovel broke too many times, ran out of duct tape, and was exausted trying to keep up the pace of maintaining to keep from hurting so bad one day at a time... so i surendered to a different one day at a time...
good wishes v29
xxoo, blesings & recovery...
rz
There's not a single person in a single room in the Fellowshipof AA worldwide ....
who got there because they were doing well.
who got there because they were doing well.
me, my shovel broke too many times, ran out of duct tape, and was exausted trying to keep up the pace of maintaining to keep from hurting so bad one day at a time... so i surendered to a different one day at a time...
good wishes v29
xxoo, blesings & recovery...
rz
Member
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: anomaly
Posts: 2,180
There's another saying in AA..you don't have to hit bottom
the bottom comes up and hit you.
A lot of us can relate to looking good on the outside and all wacked
out on the inside.
I didn't think i could relate to AA either becuase i was a bit young...22.
And of course there's reading in the BB about the young people.lol
Not totally sure what kind of alki i am, but there's a chapter in the BB
about a veriety garden. A sponsor had to piont that out to me of course.
My perception of an alcoholic was a wine O..before AA.
I didn't understand or had knowlege of alcoholism...I just had my perceptions.
Then the AA people had to just go and tell me ..."remain teachable"
Those AA folks are wacked i tell ya...telling a smart ass, know it all kid with
all the answers to remind teachable..they're crazy
the bottom comes up and hit you.
A lot of us can relate to looking good on the outside and all wacked
out on the inside.
I didn't think i could relate to AA either becuase i was a bit young...22.
And of course there's reading in the BB about the young people.lol
Not totally sure what kind of alki i am, but there's a chapter in the BB
about a veriety garden. A sponsor had to piont that out to me of course.
My perception of an alcoholic was a wine O..before AA.
I didn't understand or had knowlege of alcoholism...I just had my perceptions.
Then the AA people had to just go and tell me ..."remain teachable"
Those AA folks are wacked i tell ya...telling a smart ass, know it all kid with
all the answers to remind teachable..they're crazy
Member
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: anomaly
Posts: 2,180
here's a simple suggestion when it comes to researching
on alcoholism.
Am I going to listen or read material from the experts that are not
alcoholics without hands on experince and just have an opinion
or perceptions of what alcoholism is ?
or I am i going to read literature from alcoholics themselves,
whom lived and breath it ?
on alcoholism.
Am I going to listen or read material from the experts that are not
alcoholics without hands on experince and just have an opinion
or perceptions of what alcoholism is ?
or I am i going to read literature from alcoholics themselves,
whom lived and breath it ?
trying to get it..
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: California
Posts: 286
Originally Posted by PaperDolls 
Well, you've had problems in your life because of alcohol. That's enough. I never lost a job or family, got a DUI, or been arrested but I had issues for sure. I was headed down that path. I was lucky that I realized it before I got there. You should be too.
You deserve to be there just like everyone else. Unless of course, you want to just keep on drinking and see how bad it can get. I don't think that's what you want to do though.
Welcome to SR. Glad you're here.
You deserve to be there just like everyone else. Unless of course, you want to just keep on drinking and see how bad it can get. I don't think that's what you want to do though.
Welcome to SR. Glad you're here.
same here I have not bottomed as some have in a harsher way...but man oh man....I know I don't want too....
trying to get it..
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: California
Posts: 286
Originally Posted by BaldHeadedJohn
You'll find your bottom when you quit digging.
I didn't lose my home, my job, or sleep on the streets, but I'm convinced it was only a matter of time.
I didn't lose my home, my job, or sleep on the streets, but I'm convinced it was only a matter of time.
right on...
Member
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: London
Posts: 5
Originally Posted by verity29
Hi all,
it's great to be able to communicate wth others in recovery. I hae just been to my first two AA meetings this week.
I was amazed at the many ways i identified with the members but the one thing i don't have in common with them is rock bottom.
Many of the other members have been incarcerated, ost jobs, home, family and slept on the streets.
I have had many problems in my life with alcohol and have lost and alienated many people through my behaviour when drunk.
While i am not judging the others who have been throuh more in fact i admire them all the more for going through what they have gone through it makes me feel that i have no right to be at the same meeting as those people. It is like going to hospital with a broken finger alongside someone with a missing limb.
What do you think? All advice comments appreciated.
it's great to be able to communicate wth others in recovery. I hae just been to my first two AA meetings this week.
I was amazed at the many ways i identified with the members but the one thing i don't have in common with them is rock bottom.
Many of the other members have been incarcerated, ost jobs, home, family and slept on the streets.
I have had many problems in my life with alcohol and have lost and alienated many people through my behaviour when drunk.
While i am not judging the others who have been throuh more in fact i admire them all the more for going through what they have gone through it makes me feel that i have no right to be at the same meeting as those people. It is like going to hospital with a broken finger alongside someone with a missing limb.
What do you think? All advice comments appreciated.
If you are an alcoholic, then you have had your own tortue going on inside your head. The other half of your brain (addictive voice) must have put you through your own hell. So I reckon it doesn't matter what you have or have not done while drinking. Anyway it's not a competition to see who was the worse. For you to want to stop doing what you were doing tells a story on it's own.
For me I had to go to the very end, prison's, squatting, living in a derelict van, disowned by family and friends, insanity and at the end I really had no value of my own life. I woke up again one morning in a police cell after my friend's nan's funeral. I couldn't even hold it down for that. Then I decided to stop.
Whatever you have been through is obviously enough for yourself, thankfully you have stopped now. The "YETS" are a reality, so please don't go there. Life is a journey and now I am sober I have sense and clarity to achieve whatever I feel free to do. It's all good.
Old & Sober Member of AA
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Nursing Home in Brick, New Jersey
Posts: 5,174
This was posted in another thread captioned: The Jumping-Off Place
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The following is a partial excerpt from Chapter 11 of the AA Big Book. It describes what happens when we alcoholics reach our "bottom".
It doesn't matter whether one reaches a high or low bottom...and, it can be dangerous to compare one's drinking/bottom to that of another, for it can lead to denial and prolong the agony of active alcoholism. "I'm not that bad...perhaps I'm not really an alcoholic."
The degree of one's "bottom" is not important, as long as the decision is made to try to climb back to a sober way of living.
Have you reached your bottom?
What brought you to the point you recognized as your bottom?
What are you doing to climb out of that pit alcohol has taken you to?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The following is a partial excerpt from Chapter 11 of the AA Big Book. It describes what happens when we alcoholics reach our "bottom".
The old pleasures were gone. They were but memories. Never could we recapture the great moments of the past. There was an insistent yearning to enjoy life as we once did and a heartbreaking obsession that some new miracle of control would enable us to do it. There was always one more attempt -- and one more failure.
Some day he will be unable to imagine life either with alcohol or without it. Then he will know loneliness such as few do. He will be at the jumping-off place. He will wish for the end.
High Bottom Drunk:
An alcoholic entering AA who has maintained most of the trappings of 'success'; a family, a home, a job, a car, reputation, health, etc.. Almost everyone entering AA has hit some kind of emotional bottom, but for some the social, legal, or financial bottom may be relatively high. The more one has managed to retain upon entering AA, the higher his or her bottom is said to be.
Low Bottom Drunk:
An alcoholic entering AA who has lost 'everything;' house, car, family, job, health, etc.. Almost everyone entering AA has hit some kind of emotional or spiritual bottom but for some, the extrinsic circumstances may be particularly low. The more one has lost upon entering AA, the lower his or her bottom is said to be.
Some day he will be unable to imagine life either with alcohol or without it. Then he will know loneliness such as few do. He will be at the jumping-off place. He will wish for the end.
High Bottom Drunk:
An alcoholic entering AA who has maintained most of the trappings of 'success'; a family, a home, a job, a car, reputation, health, etc.. Almost everyone entering AA has hit some kind of emotional bottom, but for some the social, legal, or financial bottom may be relatively high. The more one has managed to retain upon entering AA, the higher his or her bottom is said to be.
Low Bottom Drunk:
An alcoholic entering AA who has lost 'everything;' house, car, family, job, health, etc.. Almost everyone entering AA has hit some kind of emotional or spiritual bottom but for some, the extrinsic circumstances may be particularly low. The more one has lost upon entering AA, the lower his or her bottom is said to be.
The degree of one's "bottom" is not important, as long as the decision is made to try to climb back to a sober way of living.
Have you reached your bottom?
What brought you to the point you recognized as your bottom?
What are you doing to climb out of that pit alcohol has taken you to?
Member
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Murrieta, Ca
Posts: 2,683
One more thing. One of the promises is "No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we can see how our experience can benefit others..."
Most people I know (self included) assume that "how far down that scale" refers to how LOW the scale goes. But, there are "high bottom " types. They have also gone down the scale, jut not as far. Hence "No matter how far down the scale...."
Most people I know (self included) assume that "how far down that scale" refers to how LOW the scale goes. But, there are "high bottom " types. They have also gone down the scale, jut not as far. Hence "No matter how far down the scale...."
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