I'm sad.
Namaste
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 63
I'm sad.
I feel sad today...and honestly, I am feeling a bit angry, and I dont know who I am angry at. I do want to drink, but I dont feel like that is the only reason why I feel upset. I just feel resentful that I cant just have a "normal" social life, I feel trapped.
I feel that way too sometimes. Like I can't go back and maybe erase this whole deal and be a "normal" person without this disease at the forefront of my mind. I have dealt with other extremely traumatizing events in my life that, with time and help, have become a part of me but not me exclusively and I have learned to live with them in my past. I know with work and time, I will feel the same way about using. I'll just have to wait. So I am not sure what to say but can only say I relate.
Hi Misscat,
It is hard to come to terms with the fact that we are not like 'normal' people and we can't do what they do when it comes to having a casual drink. I think I had to go through a period of loss and mourning for what I was giving up, even though it had caused me so much grief. Have you heard of a book called "Drinking: A Love Story" by Caroline Knapp. It's a memoir of a young, high-functioning alcoholic woman and her love affair with alcohol.
It is hard to come to terms with the fact that we are not like 'normal' people and we can't do what they do when it comes to having a casual drink. I think I had to go through a period of loss and mourning for what I was giving up, even though it had caused me so much grief. Have you heard of a book called "Drinking: A Love Story" by Caroline Knapp. It's a memoir of a young, high-functioning alcoholic woman and her love affair with alcohol.
Being "Normal" is way over-rated. I know, when we are first in recovery, it sometimes feels as if we will never have fun again. There are so many sober things to do, there are usually AA/NA dances. Check for the local Al-Anon club, or ask someone at a meeting what they do for fun. I think you will be surprised how many activities "we" do. Being Sober is the greatest gift I have, I am able to enjoy activities, remember them, not feel sick wondering what I might have said in a blackout and feel great the next day.
Also, the anger, resentment, sadness, regret etc. are all normal emotions to feel when first in recovery, it is like a Merry-Go-Round at first, never knowing where you are going to stop. These will even out with time and sobriety. Here is a hug ((((Misscat and Aducksdelight))))))) be gentle with yourselves...it will get better.
Cathy
Also, the anger, resentment, sadness, regret etc. are all normal emotions to feel when first in recovery, it is like a Merry-Go-Round at first, never knowing where you are going to stop. These will even out with time and sobriety. Here is a hug ((((Misscat and Aducksdelight))))))) be gentle with yourselves...it will get better.
Cathy
Member
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: uk
Posts: 101
Sorry your feeling like this. I understand how you feel. Hopefully these feelings will subside with time and what we "normally" do wont be so attractive. Everytime i have these feelings i think of the last horrible morning after. it was grim
Old & Sober Member of AA
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Nursing Home in Brick, New Jersey
Posts: 5,174
If being able to drink without getting drunk, throwing up, having accidents, falling off bar stools, etc. is "normal"...God bless those who are spared the so-called "fun" we thought we used to have! Imagine if you were diagnosed with diabetes and had to give up sweets...would you be as angry as you are over not being able to drink? Suppose you had cancer, and could no longer sit in the sun and get that lovely golden brown every summer...would it be worth looking pale, instead of risking your life?
Think of total abstinence from drugs/alcohol as a matter of life and death...because it truly is.
Think of total abstinence from drugs/alcohol as a matter of life and death...because it truly is.
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