I know you've all,,,,
I know you've all,,,,
Missed me!!!!! I can tell ya for sure I missed you,,,,
I thought I'd give you a glimpse into my new life
If you remember, the last installment of as the CE Girl turns, I was about to move off my island. And if that wasn't enough of a loss, I found out 2 days before I moved, my A was going into detox again (3 time in the last year)
So, my codie self was getting the best of me with the "maybe this time he'll do it" thinking. I finally figured out it was the stress of the move, a new job, staying on in my current job until a replacement is found and trained that made me TWEEK. I also found it VERY interesting that when my A used those "excuses" when he drank, I would find them unacceptable. Hmmmmmm,,does that make me as "guilty" as him in MY disease?
Anyway, I spoke to my A before he went in to detaox. He wanted to know if he should put me on the "list" for acceptable calls. I told him I had to think about it. I actually took 24 hours. I won't bore you with the details, but you can all probably guess what was going through my head Codie QUACK<QUACK<QUACK.
What surprised me, was even with all that conscious thought going on, there was a little voice deep inside me (core) that said, NO. NO CONTACT. He has to do this himself and you are not helping HIM or YOU to remain in contact. The FOCUS has to be on him. I have learned a lot thanks to my spirits, al anon, reading and the great folk here on SR.
So, I said no
He went NUTS!!! Again, spare the details, but suffice it to say, he pulled ALL the tricks outta his little alkie BAG. i stood firm. Haven't hear a word from him, but know he actually admitted himself on Friday.
I moved Sunday. Was so BUSY I didn''t have time for the codie quack. I'm finally able to sit amongst the boxes and reflect a tad. My first night in my new place. In the middle of a city I have always wanted to live in. The "eclectic" nature of the downtown right outside my door, and I realize, I have begun a new life.
I'm still new. Its ALL so new, but the one thing I KNOW I need to keep doing is take care fo myself. Just like I expect of my A.
Peace to ALL,,,
I thought I'd give you a glimpse into my new life
If you remember, the last installment of as the CE Girl turns, I was about to move off my island. And if that wasn't enough of a loss, I found out 2 days before I moved, my A was going into detox again (3 time in the last year)
So, my codie self was getting the best of me with the "maybe this time he'll do it" thinking. I finally figured out it was the stress of the move, a new job, staying on in my current job until a replacement is found and trained that made me TWEEK. I also found it VERY interesting that when my A used those "excuses" when he drank, I would find them unacceptable. Hmmmmmm,,does that make me as "guilty" as him in MY disease?
Anyway, I spoke to my A before he went in to detaox. He wanted to know if he should put me on the "list" for acceptable calls. I told him I had to think about it. I actually took 24 hours. I won't bore you with the details, but you can all probably guess what was going through my head Codie QUACK<QUACK<QUACK.
What surprised me, was even with all that conscious thought going on, there was a little voice deep inside me (core) that said, NO. NO CONTACT. He has to do this himself and you are not helping HIM or YOU to remain in contact. The FOCUS has to be on him. I have learned a lot thanks to my spirits, al anon, reading and the great folk here on SR.
So, I said no
He went NUTS!!! Again, spare the details, but suffice it to say, he pulled ALL the tricks outta his little alkie BAG. i stood firm. Haven't hear a word from him, but know he actually admitted himself on Friday.
I moved Sunday. Was so BUSY I didn''t have time for the codie quack. I'm finally able to sit amongst the boxes and reflect a tad. My first night in my new place. In the middle of a city I have always wanted to live in. The "eclectic" nature of the downtown right outside my door, and I realize, I have begun a new life.
I'm still new. Its ALL so new, but the one thing I KNOW I need to keep doing is take care fo myself. Just like I expect of my A.
Peace to ALL,,,
CE, Sis, I'm so happy you are back!! And you sound so good, too!!
I'm glad you like the new place and see the adventure of a new life ahead of you!
Way to go on saying "No!" You are such an inspiration.
Here's a little housewarming poem for you:
May your troubles be less,
And your blessings be more.
And nothing but happiness,
Come through your door.
CONGRATULATIONS!!!
I'm glad you like the new place and see the adventure of a new life ahead of you!
Way to go on saying "No!" You are such an inspiration.
Here's a little housewarming poem for you:
May your troubles be less,
And your blessings be more.
And nothing but happiness,
Come through your door.
CONGRATULATIONS!!!
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