I had no idea.

Old 06-21-2007, 08:15 PM
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I had no idea.

So, I'm new to all of this. Coming here, I kept seeing the word "codependent". And I didn't know anything about it. I'd heard the word, of course, but I never had any idea what it meant. I foolowed some links, and started reading a book that several people have recommended to me. (Codependent No More)

And OMG... It's me.

I had no idea, can you believe that? I had no clue what was going on with me. Certainly, I had no idea what to call it. And here I am, reading what feels like descriptions of myself, of my relationships both past and present. How strange.
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Old 06-21-2007, 08:22 PM
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welcome................stick around and try to read the sticky's at the top of the page......alot of good information in there.
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Old 06-21-2007, 08:28 PM
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get it, give it, grow in it
 
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hopefully you'll come to understand the "no More" part of the title.
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Old 06-21-2007, 09:14 PM
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Yay! Another Codie! Welcome!
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Old 06-21-2007, 10:24 PM
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Sometimes, the first step to freedom is knowing what something is called. If we can give a name to something, it begins to make more sense and seems more manageable.

And the second step can be knowing that you're not the only person on the planet who's ever felt the way you felt. That's pretty obvious out here

It's all a voyage of discovery and we're on this boat together, trying to figure out the best place to steer it so we can all have the lives we're hoping for.

So sit back and join the crew! Welcome aboard...

Hugs,
GiveLove
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Old 06-21-2007, 10:45 PM
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You are not alone... (((hugs)))
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Old 06-22-2007, 12:44 AM
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Originally Posted by Orangeblossom View Post
So, I'm new to all of this. Coming here, I kept seeing the word "codependent". And I didn't know anything about it. I'd heard the word, of course, but I never had any idea what it meant. I foolowed some links, and started reading a book that several people have recommended to me. (Codependent No More)

And OMG... It's me.

I had no idea, can you believe that? I had no clue what was going on with me. Certainly, I had no idea what to call it. And here I am, reading what feels like descriptions of myself, of my relationships both past and present. How strange.
Hi orange, I know how you feel. I read that book last August and I had such a revelation...it was so nice to know that i wasn't alone...that there were people who had the same experiences and that there was some way out of it!!

Welcome and you are in company of people who understand!!

Lisarae
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Old 06-22-2007, 05:10 AM
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Oh yeah.. I hit the wall (bottom.. whatever) last October and I read that book and actually felt EMBARASSED reading it....

However, as said b4.. once you see yourself and you have a name for the problem you can start the process of recovery.. and it is hard work but it is way better than being the things in that book.

Welcome!
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Old 06-22-2007, 06:52 AM
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let it grow!
 
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welcome to step one. blessings, k
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Old 06-22-2007, 07:01 AM
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I remember when I first read that book I seriously thought I should have been paid some sort of royalty fee or something because she had written a biography about me!
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Old 06-22-2007, 07:20 AM
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I had no idea I was one either. Everyone here helps each other. Welcome aboard!

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Old 06-22-2007, 07:26 AM
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Welcome to the codie club!! *grin* Seriously, I guess none of us knew what we were until we were in enough pain to start looking for answers for ourselves instead of trying to 'fix' someone else.

Stick around and learn! Glad to have you!
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Old 06-22-2007, 08:00 AM
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Yes- I too had only heard the term but never really connected myself to it. Frankly, I feel a lot less defective and alone, knowing that there are others out there that suffer from such a dysfunction. For so long I thought it was only me whose moods were dictated by another along with a slew of the other "characteristics" of codies.

You're not alone and you can recover. (I keep telling myself this
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Old 06-22-2007, 09:57 AM
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((((((OrangeBlossom)))))))



From one codie to another,

Linda
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Old 06-22-2007, 01:00 PM
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(((((ORANGEBLOSSOM))) you will learn alot with that book & coming here too.keep coming back.we r in this together.
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Old 06-22-2007, 01:08 PM
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when I read the book for the second time..........it clicked for me..........this is whats wrong with me!!!
I actually called my dad and asked him if he knew what it was (he reads alot of psychology and self help stuff .for fun)
and did he know that was whats wrong with me and how come he never told me............

he said yes he did know but it wouldnt help to tell me........I'd need to find that all on my own
And I have just still not so sure how to fix or change it.
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Old 06-22-2007, 04:40 PM
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Originally Posted by GiveLove View Post
Sometimes, the first step to freedom is knowing what something is called. If we can give a name to something, it begins to make more sense and seems more manageable.
I'm fairly new to the term too, but learning of the concept was a relief to me. I knew I felt crazy but didn't know why. Understanding the term and knowing that there's a whole community of us definitely helps. Yay for self discovery! Don't you feel empowered now that you know what's wrong and how to begin recovery?!?
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Old 06-22-2007, 06:41 PM
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Originally Posted by confuzedinva View Post
Don't you feel empowered now that you know what's wrong and how to begin recovery?!?
Yes, definitely. Now I know there are things I can do, it's not just me, and this is not "just how I am," like it's something I can't change. WOW.
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