Language of Letting Go - June 12
Nature Girl
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
Language of Letting Go - June 12
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go
Spontaneity and Fun
Practice being spontaneous. Practice having fun.
The joy of recovery is that we finally get to experiment. We get to learn new behaviors, and we don't have to do them perfectly. We only need to find a way that works for us. We even have fun experimenting, learning what we like, and how to do what we like.
Many of us have gotten into a rut with rigidity, martyrdom, and deprivation. One of the "normal" experiences many of us have been deprived of is having fun. Another one is being spontaneous. We may not have the foggiest notion what we would like to do for fun. And we may hold ourselves in check so tightly that we wouldn't allow ourselves to try something fun anyway.
We can let ourselves go a little now and then. We can loosen up a bit. We don't have to be so stiff and rigid, so frightened about being who we are. Take some risks. Try some new activities. What would we like to do? What might we enjoy doing? Then, take another risk. Pick out a movie we'd like to see; call a friend, and invite him or her to go along. If that person says no, try someone else, or try again another time.
Decide to try something, and then go through with it. Go once. Go twice. Practice having fun until fun becomes fun.
Today, I will do something just for fun. I will practice having fun until I actually enjoy it.
From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©1990, Hazelden Foundation.
Spontaneity and Fun
Practice being spontaneous. Practice having fun.
The joy of recovery is that we finally get to experiment. We get to learn new behaviors, and we don't have to do them perfectly. We only need to find a way that works for us. We even have fun experimenting, learning what we like, and how to do what we like.
Many of us have gotten into a rut with rigidity, martyrdom, and deprivation. One of the "normal" experiences many of us have been deprived of is having fun. Another one is being spontaneous. We may not have the foggiest notion what we would like to do for fun. And we may hold ourselves in check so tightly that we wouldn't allow ourselves to try something fun anyway.
We can let ourselves go a little now and then. We can loosen up a bit. We don't have to be so stiff and rigid, so frightened about being who we are. Take some risks. Try some new activities. What would we like to do? What might we enjoy doing? Then, take another risk. Pick out a movie we'd like to see; call a friend, and invite him or her to go along. If that person says no, try someone else, or try again another time.
Decide to try something, and then go through with it. Go once. Go twice. Practice having fun until fun becomes fun.
Today, I will do something just for fun. I will practice having fun until I actually enjoy it.
From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©1990, Hazelden Foundation.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: twilight zone,usa
Posts: 3,909
i think i need some fun & something to help me relax. today i think i will leave everything behind & get in the car & go to the beach.i only live 6 miles from the ocean & have not been but once this year.it has always been so relaxing to me.i feel as if i am always rushing around & never take time for the things i like to do.thank you ann, for the post this morning.yep, thats is what i am going to do when the sun comes out first thing.
Forum Leader
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: In my little piece of heaven
Posts: 2,870
The joy of recovery is that we finally get to experiment. We get to learn new behaviors, and we don't have to do them perfectly. We only need to find a way that works for us. We even have fun experimenting, learning what we like, and how to do what we like.
This concept was truly a catalyst for my recovery. I think it was the first time I treated myself as I would a friend, with compassion and humor, as I discovered what my own likes and dislikes were. I still practice this concept to day! I still have fun trying out new things and learning more about myself.
Thanks for the thread, Ann.
Cats
Nature Girl
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
When I first came to SoberRecovery, I remember a fun thread and laughing with some of the newbies at the time who have become dear friends over the years.
I laughed and laughed...something I had not done for a very long time.
It struck me then that I didn't have to live my life in sorrow and sadness and pain. I could have fun and laugh and actually live a life worth living again.
I love Hope's idea of walking the beach today, and Cat's reminder to keep trying new things and having fun with life.
I think that the day I first laughed was about the time I began to think of myself as a survivor and no longer a victim.
Just for today, I will do at least 3 things that make me laugh....just because I can.
Hugs
I laughed and laughed...something I had not done for a very long time.
It struck me then that I didn't have to live my life in sorrow and sadness and pain. I could have fun and laugh and actually live a life worth living again.
I love Hope's idea of walking the beach today, and Cat's reminder to keep trying new things and having fun with life.
I think that the day I first laughed was about the time I began to think of myself as a survivor and no longer a victim.
Just for today, I will do at least 3 things that make me laugh....just because I can.
Hugs
A work in progress....
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: FREE!!!! Somewhere in the Tennessee Mountains
Posts: 1,018
Having fun! What a wonderful concept!
I am beginning to be able to do that. I had a friend tell me last night that she saw a huge change in me-that I seem really happy now.
I couldn't have asked for a better compliment!
I am beginning to be able to do that. I had a friend tell me last night that she saw a huge change in me-that I seem really happy now.
I couldn't have asked for a better compliment!
Bridge CLOSED
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: No ones business
Posts: 1,497
I have not been good at this for years.
I do things I like to do but most of those things are demanding and I approach like work. Fun for the sake of fun has been lost on me for a LONG time as I have always been atttempting to live up to someone's ideals.
I have been thinking about this subject for awhile.. I am supposed to play with my dog as play can be used as a reward. I had to get ADVICE on this.. but she is so serious for a young dog and I don't make it any easier because I am serious too.
My new kitten is not serious about anything. Oliver thinks everything is fun!
I do things I like to do but most of those things are demanding and I approach like work. Fun for the sake of fun has been lost on me for a LONG time as I have always been atttempting to live up to someone's ideals.
I have been thinking about this subject for awhile.. I am supposed to play with my dog as play can be used as a reward. I had to get ADVICE on this.. but she is so serious for a young dog and I don't make it any easier because I am serious too.
My new kitten is not serious about anything. Oliver thinks everything is fun!
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
