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5 weeks today

Old 06-10-2007, 01:16 PM
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Determined
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Unhappy 5 weeks today

Hi
this should be a happy thread as 5 weeks today i decided to free from my life and soul from an eternity of fuzzy heads, irrational mood swings, ridiculous behaviour and a slow poisoning. I know that without you guys and this forum I would not be where I am I would be 3/4 way through bottle of vodka, and probably wine aswell.

For that I am happy and I am truly grateful.

I am struggling a bit though especially today as "the voice" is shouting at me and its real loud - it's telling me I am ok and 1 or 2 will be fine.

I am shouting back that it won't be ok and No I can't

Had a great weeks holidays and guess I am sad that is over and want to blot that out along with the whole fear of full time work again next week and the whole anxiety thing (that didnt happen once when I was away)

Sorry to ramble, I guess I just need a little support/encouragement....I'm not even sure what I want.......

Thanks for being there for me SR

CW
x
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Old 06-10-2007, 01:23 PM
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I understand what you are feeling, for some reason, couldn't get 45 days clean to save my life, that was the magic number 45. I don't know why, it still confuses me...but I do know, that it is possible to overcome. The disease is truly cunning, baffling and powerful....it will tell you the thing you are thinking in order to get you back...trust me, it WILL be worse and it WILL be more difficult to come back every time...it you are fortunate enough to make it back. 5 Weeks is an awesome start...don't give it up for that first drink, you will regret it.

Be strong, I am here for you.

Cathy
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Old 06-10-2007, 01:24 PM
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Oh yeah, Sunday afternoon ? I'd have a pint or two of Vodka in me by now. Then pass out.

It gets better
This to shall pass
You're right where you're supposed to be

Remember your last drunk. Think it through. You know if you pick up, it won't be just one.
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Old 06-10-2007, 01:28 PM
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Thanks Cathy and GP, funnily enough I was just reading the post about 1 last drunk, and then I looked back to my posts and I thought how ill and awful I felt on the 6th May 2007. I would rather have been shot than breathe another breath - yeah that was hell on earth.

"The voice" is still screaming at me but I will not listen I am a Taurus and I can be stubborn when I want to be and I WANT TO BE!!!!!!!!

X
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Old 06-10-2007, 01:38 PM
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I know how you feel.
Thats about the time my addict voice starts constantly talking to me to.
"You've done so good. One time wont hurt."
"You've come so far..Reward yourself one time."
"Just one time. You can start right back where you left off"

It's BS.
Everytime I give in I sink deeper and deeper.
And end up getting way worse than the time before.

That voice doesnt seem to shut up either.
But I can learn not to listen.
Kinda tune it out like I do the little cousins when they are getting on my nerves.

You've come a long way.
Dont listen to that voice.
Stay strong. I know you can do it.
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Old 06-10-2007, 01:48 PM
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Congratulations! stay strong..proud and inspired by your great achievements!
I guess we all get sad and don't know why....but we are sober...and that is everything....everything is alright, and all will fall into place!
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Old 06-10-2007, 02:13 PM
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good for you CW !
D
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Old 06-10-2007, 02:29 PM
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5 days was my magic number I never use to be able to get past that. You made it 5 weeks. Thats TERRIFIC!!!!!

Tell those voices to just quiet themselves down!!!!

Im a taurus also and I know how stubborn I can be. If you can be half as bull headed as I am you'll take your horns and ram them right up thse voices ASS.

Stay strong my friend you are well on your way!!!!
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Old 06-10-2007, 02:34 PM
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Thank you all. I am away to my bed now 10.30 here the voices still there but just for just now I will try to sleep and wake tomorrow and face the world stronger and happier than today!!

Hugs to you all

CW
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Old 06-10-2007, 04:08 PM
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Old 06-10-2007, 04:39 PM
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yessssssssss wolfie!!! way to go girl!!!!!
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Old 06-10-2007, 09:23 PM
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(((Wolfie)))

'the voice' is a ******* liar!
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