Oh-Riley

Hi, FRIEND of alcoholic here. She's not recovering, as you brave folks are.

I cut off contact with her recently. I couldn't take it anymore. I may be the only friend she had.

My question is: should I tell her parents about her very serious condition? I'm worried she may kill herself by accident or otherwise. Would intervention help her at this point or hurt her? She hasn't hit rock-bottom yet, but I'm afraid she's going to die before she does.

Please help....I'm so confused.

dollydo

Don't think we have met, my alcoholics are my Mom and my ex-abf, he entertained both drugs & alcohol.

My advise, Hands Off, I wouldn't contact her parents, it is not your place.

This is her issue to resolve, not yours.

As for intervention, if she wants help, she will find it. You cannot force soberity.

Take care of you, move on.

My Best,
Dolly

fluffyflea

No don't tell her parents. You have your Higher Power and she has hers. You are powerless in this situation.
Step one "We admitted we were powerless over alcohol, that our lives had become unmanageable."

Take care of yourself, ge tto some Alanon meetings.

Earthworm

steve11694

I am a grateful member of alanon and also trained in science. If I were close to her parents I might approach them in a non judgmental way. I might cite specific things she has done and include alcohol was involved. Families are often in denial of a problem that is why I would not state she is an alcoholic as they may get angry at YOU. If they are already going nuts with her, you may mention counselling and/or alanon

The alanon philosophy is fine but interventions can and do work, though not 100% of course.

Mr. Christian

Nope, you dont say a thing.

mallowcup

That's not a good way to relieve yourself of the burdon, by dumping it on them. They have no more power over it than you do. If it's bad enough for you to stop contact, that wouldn't be the best time to invite someone else in. It should be your proof that this person is determined to drink.

Grasshopper

The best help that you can give your friend,is to pray for her.
The truth is,as an alcoholic,i knew that drinking was a huge problem in my life.I was not in denil.I just chose to ignore,all the trouble ,and the effects alcohol was having in my life.I thought i had a secret,but i didnt.Everyone else knew i had a problem,and they too chose to ignore it,too.Or deal with it the best that they could.
To say something,or not,its up to you.Pray on this matter first.When there,is action,there is reaction.Be prepared.It may turn out ok,or it may turn out ,really awful,and cause more harm than good.Ask for Gods will...

Oh-Riley

Thanks for your input!! I won't tell them anything. You're right; she's determined to drink.

Spiritual Seeker

Alcoholism is a progressive sometimes fatal disease. Is she close with her family. Are you. If you are, I see no harm in voicing concern with her parents. The outcome of that will be unknown. But if you are concerned I see no reason not to speak with the family. It also depends on her age.

steve11694

Should something indeed happen to her related to alcohol and her family subsequently learns you withheld information from them it may also haunt you.

If you do speak with her family do it out of love and not self catharsis.

Regardless of what anyone says on this forum, ultimately it is a very personal decision and it is yours alone.

GlassPrisoner

Unless she never talks to them or sees them, they probably know. Everyone knows about us alkies , we just pretend they don't.