Pencil Pusher

Does anyone know why the culture of marijuana users seem to believe it is not a drug? They act like it is different than all the other drugs. Yes it is from a plant, but it still separates the user from reality, emotionally and mentally, it still provides a "headchange". It is not physically addictive I hear, but it certainly seems to be emotionally and mentally addictive. Why is this addictin not taken as seriously as other ones? Why do I resent this drug so much? Because it stole so many years of his attention that should have been mine. It was his love. LAME LOSER!!!

I would love to know what others experiences have been with someone who loves this drug so much, they will let their world fall apart before they will give it up, or if you have any general knowledge of the drug and its effects or addictive properties. Thanks!

raerae6

Well pencilpusher, I first smoked weed in high school and at first I loved it. It made music sound better and it made every little thing just seem hilarious. It also made me lose motivation to do much of anything except listen to music, laugh and eat (it makes food taste really good!) It also made me feel kind of paranoid and self conscious, but I liked the other effects so much I put up with the paranoia.

But as the years went by, I started to experience less of the nice effects and more of the unpleasant ones-like the paranoia and it made me feels like a zombie and kind of depressed. I just got tired of it and stopped. To this day many people I know STILL smoke regularily.

Many people do not get addicted to it and smoke occassionally-BUT many others become psychologically addicted. Sometimes people use it to self-medicate because they feel depressed and full of anxiety without it. Any drug is used to sort of numb the feelings a person is having and push them back instead of dealing with them. I think that this is what is unhealthy about pot.

Almost every man I've ever been involved with has been a daily pot smoker and I'm hoping next time to find one that isn't. They just aren't as fun to be with because they aren't all 'there' most of the time. Plus it is expensive and they are always broke because they spend so much on weed!!

I think the reason that weed is not considered so serious of a drug is that pot smoking does not lead to violence or blackouts like alcohol or many other drugs do. Also most people can function fairly well while high-compared to other drugs. BUT-a lot of times weed smokers lose so much motivation that thier lives go nowhere...

guineapigjude

I once went on vaca with my AH, who is an alcoholic and a career pot smoker. We were in Northern Maine when he ran out of weed. He simply could not enjoy vaca without pot, so began hanging at the c store near our hotel approaching guys that looked like pot smokers to make a connection. When that didn't work, he drove all night to our hometown in MA (300+ miles) to connect, then drove all the way back.

And pot isn't physically addicting? Maybe not for some, but for AH, he has a difficult time sleeping and focusing without it. He also gets sweaty and shaky . Maybe because todays pot isn't the pot of the 60's ~ lots of chemicals, additives, and who knows what you're smoking.

Ann

The people I hear defend marijuana the loudest are usually those who are deepest in denial about their own addiction. Sure it's a plant, so is the poppy and we all know what comes from that lovely flower.

Like any other drug, we have to decide whether we really want to continue living with it as the main focus of our lives, for us and the addict...or if we'd rather live without it and move on to healthier choices and people who can be with us mentally and enjoy our company.

We have choices, never forget that, okay?

Hugs

marteen

In addition to what Ann said, there is also that perception that it can't be bad for you if the government might "legalize" it. Well, just take a look at cigarettes and I think everyone could agree that that myth is busted! It's all about control and especially money! (taxes)

Yup, like Ann said, those who quack the loudest in favor of weed are the ones who benefit the most from its effects.

Pencil Pusher

Thanks everyone for your perspective on this- I am finally getting something. I kept wondering why he wouldn't choose me over all the substances, but it isn't a choice for him. He can't function, knows no other way to than using these substances. I could never understand why he didn't see that I was good enough, better than all that!

raerae6

Thing I've noticed is that chronic pot smokers, especially young ones, tend to stick together. A lot of people become friends pretty much based on the fact that they both smoke weed. That way if one is out of it they can go their friend's and they will probably grt them high.

When one decides to stop then watch their so-called friends not come around anymore!!!!

Elana

My XABF drug of choice the last few years was POT. He claims he "had been" a free basing coke user and he lost his reputatiuon and all the rest dute to coke use.

Well, he "may" have quit coke (and his actions did not say the same thing now that I know more from coming here) but he never quit Pot. I did not know (naive and stupid me) but now I do and he is gone. I can recall coming home from vacations with him a couple of days early. Never understood why. He claimed he wanted to get hom to "his own bed." The real reason? He was running out of weed.

This low life had all the behaviors of an addict. Self Centered. Emotionally unavailalbe. Lost a business. Was umnemployed. Child like enthusiasm for a new job until it became "work:" and then he loses interest and loses the job. Cheating. Lying.. the extent of which STILL amazes me. Scamming. Growing, dealing and using weed.

I had no idea the extent of this. Always wondered why I had not smelled his brand of tobacco before (he smoked a pipe). Always wondered why vacations got shortened. Wondered why he carried Ozium and sprayed the car with it after smoking (he said to keep the car from smelling like tobacco?!). Always wondered why he could never get it together.. why, as bright as he seemed to be he just never made his life work and was a failure at EVERYTHING.

Failed High school.
failed college.
Conditional Discharge from the Army (IOW not quite a dishonorable.. so anohter failure)
Failed at film school.
Failed owning a dry cleaners.
Failed at relationships
Failed with his photo business
Failed with having a relationship with his own family
Failed to keep any sort of job for more than 2 years
Failed at anything requiring an ongoing effort
Failed to have any credit
Failed to pay his taxes and is in trouble with the IRS

I "thought" (warning.. codie stupidity here) that he "just needed a chance to get his footing" in an environment where he could go back to school or launch a business. I provided that.. a house that was owned (so no land lord woudl evict him), the bills always paid on time, good vacations, decent car to drive and start up for his photo business. My repayment?

Lies, cheating, using a room in my basement of my house as a GROW ROOM (unbekownst to me.. he said the locked room was his camera equipment!), putting me at risk of lsoing my home, my job and my freedom, dealing drugs from my house, bringing his "new" GF to sleep with him in MY HOUSE (Grrrr)....

Oh but he isn't an addict and it is "only" some Pot.

He smoked it from morning until night every day.. much like a cigarette smoker.

I think back at what this POS did and I think back to my own stupid co dependent behavior and naivety, and it makes me SICK.

As far as I am concerned, this guy is simply a coke head that was temporarily smoking pot cuz he couldn't afford coke.. fact is, I think he was doing lines and dealing coke after he got his inheritance. He is now nearly broke again, unemployed, is running scams on Ebay and doing wedding photograophy here and there and dealing drugs .. likely growing pot.. yadda yadda yadda...

Bottom line, if they are using Pot they are using drugs and they likely exhibit all the behaviors of an addict.

If you are with a pot user, check the stickies at the top of this forum.. and "what addicts do.." Saying a pot user is "different" is just another form of denial.

calabash

I was addicted to pot for 17 years. It is a great way to escape reality and avoid life. I think that is why I smoked on and on. Because I had no idea how to live life on lifes terms. I also thought it was okay, cos it is natural you know!!!!

Only after going into recovery diod i realise how much it stole from me. Of all the drugs I took, I miss pot the most, Cos it is so good at letting you detach from the world.

It is only through working a 12 step programme that I have developed coping tools to live life.

While I miss pot sometimes, I no longer need it!

Kimm992

I've smoked pot since highschool (and know a lot of people who have done the same).

Sometimes I'll go months without smoking it at all...and other times I'll smoke 3-4 times one week. If it's not around I don't think about it....if it is around I often opt not to smoke it.

I am a very successful 27 year old with a condo, a great career, boyfriend, etc. and it doesn't effect my life in any negative way. I also have a chronic stomach condition and was told by my doctor that marijuana has been reported to help many people with my condition (although it's not yet a condition where marijuana can be prescribed) so when I have a bad stomach flare up I sometimes smoke and it eases the pain.

My bestfriend is a lawyer and smokes pot just about everyday. She has a great job, also owns a condo, has a wonderful husband and lives a very happy productive life.

That said, I do know people who smoke everyday all day long and their lives seem to have gone nowhere because of it. I don't know why it effects some people differently than others. I can only speak for myself when I say that I use it both recreationally and medicinally and have never had a problem.

Elana

Some people can drink alcohol and not get addicted to it and become alcoholics. Others cannot.

In my case, my XABF also had been a coke addict and had also used any sort of upper he could lay his hands on.. he was afraid of needles or I am sure he would done heroin. It is not the drug that makes the addict (in my experience) it is the addict beahvior that makes them addicts.

He used it all day every day. It was his band aid on life.

Ultimately MY issue with POT is that it is illegal and he was growing it in my house. I could have lost everything. ALL OF IT. He transported it across State lines and used WHILE DRIVING!!! I was IN THE CAR WITH HIM and it did not matter I did not know. Taking it across State lines is a felony!!! Growing it is a felony. Selling it is a felony! It is a violation to have a littel on you if you are caught in NY.

My X was an addict. He didn't tell me about his grow room. He was NEVER up front about his use. He KNEW I did not know and he did not CARE if I got in trouble. He didn't care about anything except making sure he had enough of this stuff.

It is still illegal and if you get caught it is still trouble.

And if you are like my XABF, you are and addict. At 52., almost 53, it is likely he will go to his grave as an addict.

As long as he is not anywhere near me, good for him.

Kimm992

I think it's taken a lot less seriously (legally) in Canada.

I see someone on the street smoking pot at least once/day and if you get caught with a small amount on you then you just get a small fine (if that).

raerae6

Yes that's definately true.
I've traveled around Canada some and I went to Vancouver a few years ago.
I walked into a coffee shop there and people were smoking pot right out in the open-doing bongs and everything.

But they had just just passed a no-cigarette smoking in public law-so no cigs allowed (LOL)

I had heard of this place, and it turned out to be right near where I was staying so even though i don't smoke pot anymore-I had to see if what I heard is true so I went in. They had signs all over saying 'no buying or selling allowed'. Pot is not legal, but it is tolerated. I believe that this is the only coffee shop like that in Canada, though.

Back home here i live in a crack infested neighborhood-there are always people standing around asking "need anything?" (I live in Mpls., MN) Nowhere have I ever been offered drugs of all kinds the way I was in Vancouver...

Don't be discouraged anyone from going there because of what I said-Vancouver is a beautiful and interesting city. I could go on here, but then i'd have to move this to a travel blog! Lets just say I have fantasized about living there.

I have never felt unsafe in any Canadian city.
I walked through the 'worst part' of Vancouver late at night and didn't feel threatened at all! My neighborhood at home is much worse! There doesn't seem to be much crime in Canada.

Also Canadian cities are SO CLEAN. Toronto was really nice, too. i didn't get much time there, but I would like to go back.

raerae6

And the same with pot.


I agree with Elana. To be honest I think alcohol is much worse-people can drink to black-out state. Pot doesn't do that. I think that weed is in a somewhat different catagory than 'hard' drugs-but that it still can cause definate problems for some people.

I think medical marijuana is fine and I don't care if people smoke recreationally or whatever.
I've seen people who smoke all the time and get real crabby and definately go through withdrawl when they are out of it. That would describe every ex-boyfriend of mine. Ugh!

I just thought of something Henry Rollins said about pot...quote....

"You would think that pot had some kind of power; I mean come on, it’s a plant, not a reason for living. Controlled by a plant, how hilarious. A plant! A f**king plant!"

Kimm992

I agree about alcohol being MUCH worse.

Also, I do believe that if smoked frequently enough that marijuana can become physically addictive to a degree. I've never experienced any kind of addiction to it myself but had a friend who smoked multiple times/day and decided to quit...it took him about 2 weeks to be able to sleep properly after he stopped smoking....so there's definitely something there.

That said, if you drink enough coffee you'll get withdrawls from that too....so....

Elana

I am sorry to have people think I think Alcohol is worse than pot. I had an alcoholic husband and an addict BF.

When it comes to ruined lives, I find no difference. X husband and XABF had more similar traits than dissimilar and the X husband was a lot more successful in life than the XABF.

No.. I see not benefit of one over the other. Not in my experience. Neither is a darn bit of good.

raerae6

I'm controlled by a plant as well...nicotine! I go through definate withdrawls when i quit.


Elana-your right. Anything can cause a problem and when there's aproblem, it's all bad.

Elana

NOT AT THE SAME TIME. I was married and then divorced and nearly two years passed b4 BF, now XABF, came into my life.

Need to keep that straight! :

Spiritual Seeker

Pot continues to be "gateway" drug for kids Pot may not destoy your life like crak,meth, heroin, etc. but it is definitely addictive and chips away at the addictive center deep in the brain. Rationaliaztion and denial is strong in pot smokers, it makes teens lethargic and unmotivated and sets a bad cycle in motion.

Pencil Pusher

Elana, I was not saying he was different at all! It seems like they do- that particular group- potsmokers, they think they are not like otehr drug users, cause its only pot I guess. Believe me, it took me a long time to figure it out, but I know it's ver much the same- maybe even harder because it is looked at as a less severe addiction, with less dangerous consequences, so it seems harder for them to get past the denial stage maybe...