Big Decision
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Idaho Falls Idaho
Posts: 7
Big Decision
Big Decision
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My AS will be released from jail on June 23rd. We are wrestling with the decision to not let him come back home. He has been on probation since 16 and in and out of jail repeatedly for the last year. He has failed out patient treatment 4 times and in-patient treatment 1 time. He was out of a 30 day stretch in jail for exactly 12 days, back home, and had 2 dirty UA's in that time. He is all of 20 years old. We agreed, him too, that when he came home the condition of his coming home was that he remain clean. I do not feel like we can let him come back this time, I have a 13 yr old son who I believe does not need to have to live with AS and his bull. Any Advice
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My AS will be released from jail on June 23rd. We are wrestling with the decision to not let him come back home. He has been on probation since 16 and in and out of jail repeatedly for the last year. He has failed out patient treatment 4 times and in-patient treatment 1 time. He was out of a 30 day stretch in jail for exactly 12 days, back home, and had 2 dirty UA's in that time. He is all of 20 years old. We agreed, him too, that when he came home the condition of his coming home was that he remain clean. I do not feel like we can let him come back this time, I have a 13 yr old son who I believe does not need to have to live with AS and his bull. Any Advice
Member
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: dallas texas
Posts: 1,629
have you thought about a halfway house? I've read good results come from them. I understand you not wanting him around the younger child, he deserves some normalcy in his life.
I'll keep you in my prayers. I'll have to make the same decision in a few weeks, again.
blessings,
susan
I'll keep you in my prayers. I'll have to make the same decision in a few weeks, again.
blessings,
susan
Member
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: on the road
Posts: 110
I also think a halfway house would be a good answer. I did not listen to my gut when I let my then 20 yr old come back home after rehab. It turned out to not be a good decision. She is 21 now, and out on her own.
jeepgirl
jeepgirl
Member
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: twilight zone,usa
Posts: 3,909
welcome to S.R. lots of caring people here.my son is the addict in my life.he has been in & out of prison for the pass 12 yrs.,mostly in. i have begged him to go to a half way house for the last few times he got out.he never would.he has a wife & children that kept taking him back.same actions, same results.please for your sake do not let him come home.maybe he will be forced to go to a half way house.they need to learn another way of life.my prayers are with you & your son.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Idaho Falls Idaho
Posts: 7
I have discussed halfway house placements with the PO and Drug Court, have even offered to pay for it. They say there are no placements....the only option is the homeless shelter.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: tween Mich.and Fla
Posts: 74
If you can find a homeless shelter that is faith based it might work with a lot of structure for them to follow and rules. Son went in one did well and then didnt pass a UA test. He had 30 minutes to pack and get out. Now in detox.Then can get back in. Some have more rules and help offered to them ,some dont. It just depends on the person and how much help they want too. Some think that they can do it on their on. Some dont. Good luck.
On a tear
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Volcano Country!
Posts: 3,221
Both my kids went to rehab, neither was allowed home after... we got burned too, too many times.
And worse - it seemed to be a trigger for THEM, as well. So for ALL our sakes, they didn't come home.
Both tried Oxford Houses (sober living arrangements - put the term into a google search). Son excelled... daughter not so much. But both could only blame THEMSELVES when things went sour, and could take all the CREDIT when they did not.
It was an excellent experience for each of them... and a bit of a gentle way to ease them into some of the responsibilities of adulthood.
((Hugs))
And worse - it seemed to be a trigger for THEM, as well. So for ALL our sakes, they didn't come home.
Both tried Oxford Houses (sober living arrangements - put the term into a google search). Son excelled... daughter not so much. But both could only blame THEMSELVES when things went sour, and could take all the CREDIT when they did not.
It was an excellent experience for each of them... and a bit of a gentle way to ease them into some of the responsibilities of adulthood.
((Hugs))
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
