Language of Letting Go - May 14
Nature Girl
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
Language of Letting Go - May 14
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go
Honesty
Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.
--Step Five of Al-Anon
Talking openly and honestly to another person about ourselves, in an attitude that reflects self-responsibility, is critical to recovery.
It's important to admit what we have done wrong to others and to ourselves. Verbalize our beliefs and our behaviors. Get our resentments and fears out in the open.
That's how we release our pain. That's how we release old beliefs and feelings. That's how we are set free. The more clear and specific we can be with our Higher Power, ourselves, and another person, the more quickly we will experience that freedom.
Step Five is an important part of the recovery process. For those of us who have learned to keep secrets from others, and ourselves it is not just a step - it is a leap toward becoming healthy.
Today I will remember that it's okay to talk about the issues that bother me. It is by sharing my issues that I will grow beyond them. I will also remember that it's okay to be selective about those in whom I confide. I can trust my instincts and choose someone who will not use my disclosures against me, and who will give me healthy feedback.
From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©1990, Hazelden Foundation.
Honesty
Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.
--Step Five of Al-Anon
Talking openly and honestly to another person about ourselves, in an attitude that reflects self-responsibility, is critical to recovery.
It's important to admit what we have done wrong to others and to ourselves. Verbalize our beliefs and our behaviors. Get our resentments and fears out in the open.
That's how we release our pain. That's how we release old beliefs and feelings. That's how we are set free. The more clear and specific we can be with our Higher Power, ourselves, and another person, the more quickly we will experience that freedom.
Step Five is an important part of the recovery process. For those of us who have learned to keep secrets from others, and ourselves it is not just a step - it is a leap toward becoming healthy.
Today I will remember that it's okay to talk about the issues that bother me. It is by sharing my issues that I will grow beyond them. I will also remember that it's okay to be selective about those in whom I confide. I can trust my instincts and choose someone who will not use my disclosures against me, and who will give me healthy feedback.
From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©1990, Hazelden Foundation.
Nature Girl
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
Talking openly and honestly to another person about ourselves, in an attitude that reflects self-responsibility, is critical to recovery.
It's important to admit what we have done wrong to others and to ourselves. Verbalize our beliefs and our behaviors. Get our resentments and fears out in the open.
That's how we release our pain. That's how we release old beliefs and feelings. That's how we are set free. The more clear and specific we can be with our Higher Power, ourselves, and another person, the more quickly we will experience that freedom.
It's important to admit what we have done wrong to others and to ourselves. Verbalize our beliefs and our behaviors. Get our resentments and fears out in the open.
That's how we release our pain. That's how we release old beliefs and feelings. That's how we are set free. The more clear and specific we can be with our Higher Power, ourselves, and another person, the more quickly we will experience that freedom.
When I accepted what I had done to myself, I could see more clearly how my own sickness had affected all those I lived with. I enabled my son out of fear, I tried to control what was not mine to control, I neglected other family members and friends because all my time and energy was consumed by my own codepenent lifestyle. Indeed, I did have resentments, some going back to my childhood when fear of bad things happening to people I loved was suppressed because in those days we didn't "share" our feelings and our fears and I'm not sure that they would have been understood even if I had.
What a load of emotional burden that took off of me, to just share with one person I trusted (in my case my sponsor) and to talk to God about it. All this led to forgiveness, forgiveness of those who never meant to hurt me, and forgiveness of myself even though I did what I had to do at the time. When I learned better, I did better and could let go of my guilt and self-deprecation.
One of the reasons I so strongly suggest live meetings is that I don't think I could have worked any of the steps as well as I did without the guidance of someone (my sponsor) who had been through them before and understood not only what they meant but also how much learning to work the steps would help heal old wounds and prepare me for a better life ahead.
Hugs
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