kermit

Why do I feel as if I'm being punished for all the the things he has done. ? I'm just feeling alittle weak today. My house has not sold and if I don't get a offer by June I'm done for. I'm out of money. If only he would send money, we would be okay. I'm about to lose everything.. Where will we go?
Maybe I should have not gone back to school I don't know any more. I'm completley lost... I got turned down for government help. No medical nothing. I'm sleepy and feeling sorry for myself today.

I try so hard to do the right things but I'm not so sure anymore...

lilac

Just breathe in.......breathe out.

I know it is overwhelming. It will all work out, you know that.

I will say a prayer for you.

WantsOut

Oh Kerm, I wish I had an answer for you cause then I'd have an answer for me. I'm in the same boat, as you know. *sigh* I'm out here feeling it too sister, for whatever that's worth.

LaTeeDa

Kermie, you can only do what is in your heart. You went back to school because it was the right thing at the time. If you need to rethink that decision based on current circumstances and maybe postpone it for awhile, then so be it. You can only do what you can do when you can do it. Trust yourself to make the right decisions. Don't second guess yourself so much. If something doesn't work out the way you had it planned, then go to plan B. You will make it, I know you will, cause you are a survivor, not a victim!

We never know what lessons life has in store for us. We can only learn them with grace and diginity, and I have seen you do that that many times. I am saying all this to you, but the truth is I need to hear it, too. Life doesn't always turn out as we planned it, but it does always turn out as it should.

You will be fine, I know you will,

L

kermit

Thank you, All of you, youall are just what I needed

Sunflower

kermie!!!! Stay strong--everything happens for a reason--I can't believe you weren't allowed any help from the government--awful!!!maybe in the 11 th hour the house will sell--what about you were taking in borders? did you change your mind?((((HUGS))))))

Zoey

What about the "Women in Chris" line, you would certainly quilify to call and talk to them. Perhaps you have.

chero

(((((((KERMIE)))))))))

Saying a prayer for you tonight!!

FormerDoormat

Kermie, if you can't sell your home, can you rent out rooms? Or rent out the entire house and find a cheaper place to live? I can't remember, are you currently working? If not, have you considered looking for a job?

The housing market usually picks up quite a bit in June, after school lets out for the year. Perhaps you'll get an offer in a week or two. Don't give up faith and don't forget to ask your HP for what you need.

Pick-a-name

Kermie;I'll be keeping you in my prayers,too.

WhatAboutME

Kermit,

I'm thinking of you too! Good idea about renting out the house. The real estate market is in a bit of a slump where I live as well, but the rental market is red hot! I'm sorry you're in such a tight spot. I know how you feel. My AH lost his job in late February and left me with a pile of debt and the house to contend with. And you know what, if I can't pay a bill on time, so be it. I'd rather have bill collectors call me than deal with a drunk. I keep reminding myself that no matter how hard things get - financial hardship, being lonely, etc. - nothing can possibly compare to the misery I have endured for the past 10 years of living with an alcoholic. I would rather live in a tent and cook my dinner in a paper bag over a campfire ala girl scouts than live another day in that miserable environment!

Things will get better. Have faith.

venusinlibra

I was in the same situation when my ABF went into rehab, I rented out one of the rooms for the summer to students. I am receiving twice the amount of money I would normally receive from a roommate. There are many people on vacation, students, new to the area looking to rent furnished rooms. Saved my butt...just an idea.

kermit

I'm just worried about the kids... Thats all.. Maybe renting out the house is the next thing to do, It still won't be enough to pay the mortgage. I need to talk with my realtor...

Cecilia

Im sorry youre in such a mess. Seems like we are always on a clean up detail doesnt it. Lots of good suggestions by people who have already been there. I haven been there but Id like to add my two cents anyway. You can ignore me if you want. <smilie> .

Have you considered talking to the bank. Tell them you have it up for sale and your circumstances. Ask them if you could just pay interest until it sells. You wont be reducing your principle but thats okay cause youll be selling shortly. The bank should be okay with this cause theyll still be getting their money the interest.

Interest only loans are not a good idea if you plan to stay cause all you do is pay interest and your principle never goes down. Over time some people have ended up owing more than when they started. But as a short term solution I think it has merit.

I would do it now. If you wait until youre in a hole and cant get out the bank wont talk to you. The bank doesnt want you to default and contrary to public opinion they dont want your house. Most of the time they lose money when they auction these houses. The bank makes their money off the loan interest.

kermit

My problem is that I'm already on a repayment plan. See when my husband got up and left he failed to mention that we were behind on the mortgage. I don't know if they will work something else out with me.. But i have tried to call, no one returns my call. I will keep trying and if I have to go to there corporated office I will. Thanks for the advise

Cecilia

Well Heck. Still couldnt hurt to ask.

Tell them that if they let you do interest only then youd have more money to use for catch up. If you file for bankrupcy or default theyre not gettin nuthin for a while. It takes a while to kick somebody out. Especially if they have kids. And dont let them threaten you with bad credit. A boo boo on your credit report will hurt you but its not going to do them any good.

I dont know all the partculars on this one but another thing to consider is something called a short sale. Basically the bank takes the house back and calls it even. This does affect your credit tho. Also there could be tax stuff. Theyre working on a bill to fix this. But right now the Irs considers any money fogiven to be money you recieved as a gift and they want you to pay taxes on it. So be careful with this one.

I think youre right about doing it in person. Might be easier to find the right person. Harder for them to ignore you too. LOL

Highlander99

Sorry to hear things are not going well, I will not know for a while if I can keep my house until I talk to a lawyer. The wife left, crazy, drank for almost 5 years and has been in AA only 2 months. Thats the short version, a little advice, don't try to save your credit, forget it, mourn it and move on. You are better off to go bankrupt then to try to save your credit. Stop paying your house payment, if you are still paying it, because if your going to loose the house it is going to be months before they foreclose and evict. Start looking for a place to rent ASAP and god bless. Thats about all I can tell you.

dollydo

Kermit,

Maybe it's time to put you education on hold. Get out there and find a job. One that offers medical insurance.

I am all for education, to a point, after I got my BA I realized that was all I could do at that point in my life, my career was taking off and I chose the career. Not having a masters never held me back.

Sometimes we have to put our dreams on hold and deal with what is facing us today. Being a professional student if fine, if it can be afforded, this you cannot do at this juncture of your life.

Use the education you have garnered to get a decent job and provide security for your children.

The house, well, maybe time to let go of it too. I might add that if that is your plan,
get a job first, many companies do a credit check on their future employees and a foreclosure could nix the job.

Make a plan, follow through, you cannot depend on him to do anything, it is all up to you.

kermit

First of all, dollydo... I just got laid off from the mortgage industry and if you have a tv you know that in the last 6 months there have been at least 50 to 100,000 people who have lost there jobs across the country. No having said that, I'm going to a vocational school so I can change "my career!" There is no work for me. I was a stay home mom for 3yrs I went back to the industry because it is all I know, I have done it since I was 20 Mor than 1/2 of my life. I'm insulted by you and hope never to hear from you again. I'm doing what I thought was right, No need for your harsh words...It wasn't a dream it was something I thought would help seeing that the medical field will always be around... Oh, I don't think I like you very much!!!!

StandingStrong

(((kermit)))

I know that you are really stressed out right now, frustrated, and angry and probably have a million different emotions going on all at once. But I hope that when you wake up tomorrow and re-read this thread that you'll find that others mentioned pretty much what dollydo said, only used different words. Perhaps her words hit a little too close for comfort? or maybe you're just lashing out? Or hey, maybe I am completely misunderstanding this all.

Kermit - for the record, I have a tv but I don't watch the news much and I don't really keep on current events. I find it's depressing and I've had enough of watching the violence and misery on television, I had enough of that in my real life already and I don't like that the news feels that chaos sells and gets ratings when I'd much rather hear about good stories.

Anyways.....I guess what I'm trying to say - though I don't seem to be doing a great job at it, is that I'm really sorry that you are stressing out and having a really rotten time right now. And I hope things get better for you soon.

Remember - we may not always like what we hear when we are here at SR but each of us comes to each other with support. Sometimes it doesn't seem like it, but we can't always read others intentions or "tone" in text. So hope you know that I don't mean my post to be negative or cruel.