confused 2

I am having trouble understanding how to handle being a wife of an alcoholic. HE is doing well and under treatment and i feel like a snowgloble that is shook up and cant calm down. I feel like my world has been turned around so fast i dont know what to do. I am bi polar to top it off and the stress is really hitting me hard. I was advised to go on this site and maybe able to get some help. I guess any help would be good and I would try anything at this point. I am going to go to an appointment with him to talk to his counslor.

Macushla

I am by no means able to give you any advice - being new to this myself but I have found great help and solace here.

dollydo

Welcome,

Pull up a chair, get comfortable, lots of great people and support here.

I can understand why you feel the way you do, it all becomes a jumble.

We are here for you, keep posting and read others threads, believe me it will help clear the "snow"

Dolly

denny57

Welcome, confused 2, glad you're here!

It sounds like your husband is in treatment; are you attending any support group such as Al-Anon? Face to face support has been a valuable part of my own recovery.

Look forward to getting to know you.

Sunflower

Welcome!!!!! Keep posting.
My Son is Bi polar---yes the stress is not good at all for you--have you seen your Doctor lately? Make sure to take your medication during all this--ask the Doc if it needs any adjustment....((((HUGS)))))

confused 2

I cant explain the feelings i have and I have even thought a hand full of pills would be easiser then the unknow the stress the tears and shame. I cant believe i didnt see him drinking again. I feel like a fool and have worked so hard to have what we have. we have been together for 30yrs and I always thought we where the perfect couple. I am scared to see what is down the road for us. he tells me it will get better and he will never drink again for this withdraw time he thought he was going to die. I dont know if I can believe him I want to but i am so confused. I want to sleep all the time i dont want to eat/not that would be a bad idea could lose a few pds. I am sorry for rambling I am just so confused and scared.

confused 2

i take my meds daily and see my dr this week.I have not been to a meeting and feel i cant do a face to face yet since i am an emotional wreck. i cry all the time and even if i try to be happy i am crying on the inside.

dollydo

I know how difficult this is, my heart goes out to you.

You sound like you are depressed, who wouldn't be.

All I can say is, take baby steps to move forward for you. Maybe journal your daily thoughts, it did help me. Looking back on them I was able to gain some clarity on my situation, reviewing the journal helped me to find a new path. One that gave me a balance, a direction.

Sunflower

Most of us have been the same way at one time or another--know you are not alone.Keep writing here--it helps sometimes just to have a safe place to vent and let it all hang out.You sound sad and have fear of the future--what will the end result be....none of us ever knows...just be kind to youself and learn all you can about how to handle what you are now going thru......and YES--make sure you tell the Doctor this week how you have been feeling....So sorry for your pain....

elizabeth1979

Hi confused 2,

It is all so confusing. I like the snowglobe analogy. Thats exactly how it feels. Waiting for things to settle after being shook up. The good news, is things can settle.
The stress doesnt go away just bc they stop drinking. The lies, the non-admissions, they all add up and its up to us to work on our reaction to those things the alcoholic was doing while drinking. Its not just you, its not a walk in the park. I promise, I thought things would be fine if 'he would only stop drinking'..

Im so glad you dropped in..hope you stick around!
Oh, and the handful of pills..Ive thought that too for a fleeting moment when nothing was working. Thats when I started something new..what I was doing wasnt working.

confused 2

Thanks to all for the warm welcome and kind words. I am emotionaly exhausted and heading to bed. I look forward to work since it seems to be my get away. I will be back on and again thanks for the support. I am going to go to a meeting Monday and hope I dont break down since I am not strong at all yet. I dont want the meeting to think what kind of nut is she. Oh the confussion is so hard to explain. Have a good night and best of luck to each of you.

lilac

Welcome, and (((hugs to you))).

I am sooo glad you are going to a meeting.....don't worry if you do break down, they will NOT think you are nuts. My first al-anon meeting, I did not say a word and sat there and cried.......my reaction did not seem to phase any of them.

It will get better....please keep posting.

chero

Welcome Confused. You have found a home here!

Oh those crazy snowglobes. Just when things start to settle back down somebody comes along and shakes it all over again!
The secret is to remember that even though the snow is flying all over the place and the waves are rocking around...you can learn to stand strong in the midst of it.

How?

This place is a good start....talk, laugh, cry, vent away...anything!

It is empowering to find people to understand what you are going through.
Don't be afraid to ask questions...and ask and ask and ask until you get it.

One day you'll wake up and realize that the snow is blowing and the waves are rocking and you are doing just fine.

Glad you are here!

denny57

I cried through my first meetings - plural - and no one thought I was nuts. Apparently they all cried through their first meetings, too.

((()))

confused 2

I wen to a meeting with hybby and his consoler and then i had my appt with my physcritisis. sorry for spelling. Totally mentaly exhasuted today. I did laugh and smile a few times so that felt good. I am going to a Alonon meeting and my friend is going with me. Scared alittle not sure on what to expect. I need to get mu thoughts together and try to get back in the "normal" life again what ever that may be. Keep your fingers crossed. Thanks eveyone for the support.

Sunflower

Stay Strong! Take care of yourself and keep us updated!

confused 2

ok tonight is the 1st Alanon meeting. kind of nervous and not sure what to expect. I am going with my gf and she will support me if needed. i dont think i will talk I think i need to listen for now.

denny57

Good luck, confused 2!

loveRoy

Confused, welcome. This board has been my salvation. Keep reading and keep posting. Believe me, you are not a fool. One bridge at a time.

parentrecovers

private counseling and face to face alanon meetings help me. blessings, k