Can I get your opinion?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Ballston Lake, New York
Posts: 79
Can I get your opinion?
Hello,
I have been having a problem with my drinking for quite a while. My sister who is very qware of my problems called me the other night sitting at a bar calling me and telling me that she's having a glass of wine and will be going home and having a few morel
What is scaring the most is that when I drink I seem to black out and try to kill myself which my husband tells me because I can't remember and my sister knows this. Everytime I go to visit her and her husband actually poor shots for me and make me drink "I know it's all up to me but when your drunk you have no CHOICE and she knows this.
Theresa
I have been having a problem with my drinking for quite a while. My sister who is very qware of my problems called me the other night sitting at a bar calling me and telling me that she's having a glass of wine and will be going home and having a few morel
What is scaring the most is that when I drink I seem to black out and try to kill myself which my husband tells me because I can't remember and my sister knows this. Everytime I go to visit her and her husband actually poor shots for me and make me drink "I know it's all up to me but when your drunk you have no CHOICE and she knows this.
Theresa
JUST DO IT!!
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Here Or There
Posts: 7,612
My opinion and take it for what it cost you (which is nothing) would be to ask her not to call anymore when she is drinking. Also it might be a good idea if you try to go to AA there we can help you the most at the meetings. I hope the best for you and yes it is hard when we are in our disease. Just be gentle with yourself and get the help that you need.
With Love and Respect
Vic
PS bymyself YOU ARE NEVER BYYOURSELF! YOU have all of us
With Love and Respect
Vic
PS bymyself YOU ARE NEVER BYYOURSELF! YOU have all of us
Life is Grand
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Michigan
Posts: 2,039
I agree....sever that relationship, until you Sister respects that you are in recovery. Shame on her for trying to sabotage you.....she should be ashamed. It also sounds like she may need help too...but you can't do it for her...good luck.
Cathy
Cathy
Looking For Myself...Sober
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Where the heart is
Posts: 10,209
I dont even know what to say to that. You have the right idea of wanting to stop. Thats half the battle.
I just dont understand why someone would do that.
Dont be to hard yourself tho. You can get through it.
But I would suggest getting some help or talking with someone if you do what you say in your black outs.
And no...you are not alone! You see where I am right....Hit my Im if you ever need to talk.
I just dont understand why someone would do that.
Dont be to hard yourself tho. You can get through it.
But I would suggest getting some help or talking with someone if you do what you say in your black outs.
And no...you are not alone! You see where I am right....Hit my Im if you ever need to talk.
JUST DO IT!!
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Here Or There
Posts: 7,612
Try this link out if you need more help let us know AOK 
http://alcoholism.about.com/od/aany/qt/blaany.htm
http://alcoholism.about.com/od/aany/qt/blaany.htm
JUST DO IT!!
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Here Or There
Posts: 7,612
Originally Posted by chiynita 
I just dont understand why someone would do that.
k.
k.
In the grip of our disease we show no mercy! Misery loves misery that is why stuff like that happens. I have had a huge amount of girls come by (NOTICE THAT I SAID GIRLS
) and try to get me to go back out. It hasn't been easy to say NO! But it has been doable at least for the last 10 1/2 months. Grateful today to be clean!With Love and Respect
Vic
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Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,502
I needed to make choices in early sobriety to do what I needed to do. And, it sounds like you know you need to make a decision to stay away from your sister, at least for awhile. Blacking out and try to kill yourself is really serious and you need to take care of yourself, whatever it takes.
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Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
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Member
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: pass the bon bons
Posts: 2,363
listen to the advice here.......and welcome to sr.......
it is hard to think about distancing yourself from someone you care about.....especially a sister, and for women to put ourselves above someone else.....well, it seems impossible sometimes........but sometimes it's necessary......especially when you are in recovery or wish to be sober......try to put yourself first right now.......
hugs
ayla
it is hard to think about distancing yourself from someone you care about.....especially a sister, and for women to put ourselves above someone else.....well, it seems impossible sometimes........but sometimes it's necessary......especially when you are in recovery or wish to be sober......try to put yourself first right now.......
hugs
ayla
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Ballston Lake, New York
Posts: 79
Is it a Real Disease or is it a Weakness in my character? Why is my sister able to handle it and not me? My dad also drinks but I can't seem to handle it like they can.
theresa
theresa
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Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: El Cerrito, California
Posts: 580
It's not exactly a disease the same way mumps and measles are diseases. Put it is a progressive, predicatable condition. Almost everyone who quits needs help to do it--and it's not we have no will power either. Functioning in the aftermath of a bender takes enormous will power.
Sounds like your sister and brother-in-law have a problem too, and for you to deal with your problem might mean they should deal with theirs, which is something the addicted brain wants no part of.
I'm the only alcoholic in my immediate family, but had to stay away from the rest in early recovery because of old issues. Eventually I found the strength and resources to deal with those issues, but I had to learn how to stay sober first.
Sounds like your sister and brother-in-law have a problem too, and for you to deal with your problem might mean they should deal with theirs, which is something the addicted brain wants no part of.
I'm the only alcoholic in my immediate family, but had to stay away from the rest in early recovery because of old issues. Eventually I found the strength and resources to deal with those issues, but I had to learn how to stay sober first.
Looking For Myself...Sober
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Where the heart is
Posts: 10,209
"It's not exactly a disease the same way mumps and measles are diseases. Put it is a progressive, predicatable condition. Almost everyone who quits needs help to do it--and it's not we have no will power either. Functioning in the aftermath of a bender takes enormous will power."
Thank you..Somebody who has finally explained the disease concept in a way I get it. I refuse to classify addiction as a disease but you have shed light in a way my caveman brain can understand why it is called that.
Hey how do you quote just part of a post??
Thank you..Somebody who has finally explained the disease concept in a way I get it. I refuse to classify addiction as a disease but you have shed light in a way my caveman brain can understand why it is called that.
Hey how do you quote just part of a post??
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