hopeforever

well my husband was clean for a week,,
it wasa long hard week for allofus.. noteasy at all.. up and down and so much moods swings in this home .. i really feel like i had enough.
he wen t touse again today,, stupid me was wiaiting for him like a child inthe window...im kinda mad..
anyways just feel; like i need some emotional hugs now lol,,,
and i feel like i can take it anymore.
i changed so much im so stressed. iwish i had some peace .
read the book courage to change.. ithelps.
well im so sad and mad now..........
but i knew it was coming he was waking up in the middle of thenight to look for money that i hided,,looking for reasons to have an argument with me..
im just thinking what i can do now,, to make things still work,, and what to do,,.. please pray for us. amen

itiswhatitis...

i'm praying...

love,
s

patchoulli

you have my prayers. take care of yourself

Done_With_It

(((((Hopeforever)))) That is that nature of addiction, a week is normal, You can just work on taking care of you, you can't change him, if you try it will just cause him to lie... I am sorry you are feeling so bad, I can only imagine.
(((Take care of you)))

liesagain

I'm going to pray for you too!

kj0975

I am sorry this is happening again I will wish for some serenity in your life and for some peace. Its sad that we know a relapse faster than the addict sometimes and I'm the addict in my house (vicoden).

krhea75

prayers and hugs to you...
krhea

nogard

As Done says take care of (((you)))

Kevin

bren38

My heart goes out to you. I am sorry you have to go through all of this. My prayers are with you and yours.

Ann

I am sending a bucket of hugs and prayers too. I know how hard this is for you and the sad thing is we cannot do a thing about their choices, just our own.

Have you tried meetings? They may help you get through this and feel more balanced.

Just take it all one day at a time and look after yourself first.

Hugs

hopeforever

thank u everyone!!

tropikgal2

Prayers and hugs to you. I sincerely hope that things get better. You are probably better informed now than when you first came on board with SR. Use the things you've learned to better your life for YOU!

teke

sorry hope, i know what its like to be like the child in the window too. you seem to have excepted that relapse is just a part of addiction, now maybe its time for you to come up with a plan b just in case you need one. i know that you don't want to leave your husband so if i had to make a suggestion, it would be that you make a conscience decision to seperate yourself emotionally, and continue to save what you can.

maybe its time to take a bigger step back and let him fall on his own. he may not think that his addiction is that bad cause you are there to help hold the household together. maybe you can consciencely decide to only take care of you and the kids for awhile. if he wants to go, let him go. i know that it is easier said than done, but he may have to hit rock bottom before he gets determined to do whatever it takes to stay sober. have no expectations, just do whatever you have to do for you and your kids.

in my opinion, he has no real reason to want to get clean, i know he says that he does and is trying to do what he said, but addiction is much stronger than what he is saying. as long as he has a comfortable home to come to whenever he is finished using, he not ever develop that do or die determination that it will take for him to stay clean. for now, try to keep the focus totally on you and let him worry about himself. if ever you have to go, then you'll know. keeping you and yours in my prayers. pm me if you want to talk. i'm so sorry, you all deserve more.

you know that i had to leave my rah for awhile, i just couldn't take what he was doing to himself and us.

parentrecovers

big hugs. don't lose hope. blessings, k