nogard

.... Taking some poison and waiting for the other person to drop dead

Done_With_It

I heard that when I read that resentment leads to cancer in some book.
I really liked it too! So true!

nogard

yep, every time I go to take that poison these days and wag my finger saying you'll see I remember this

nogard

And very good to see you Done, I missed you

Done_With_It

You too, I think we just keep miss each other, cuz I've been around but haven't seen you either, lol

nogard

lol, yes I knew you where ok as I glimpsed a post here and there

SaTiT

Life is not without pain, however sufferning is optional.
Anger is a natural emotion, which a secondary of fear.

Doing the samething over and over again and expecting
different results is insanity.

A resentment is re-living that anger over and over again.
alcoholics have verious degrees of compulsive and obsessive behavior. It is also addictive. You get the midnight oil burning , or in other words there's a far amount of mind masturbation going on.

If you observe youself during a rage or an emotional
out break. I'll notice you'll get disconnect as if you're
in a trance, then you'll notice the rush, then you'll
notice the down, as if someone let the air out of ya.
Once I accept this as I did with my drinking problem
I apply the same principles of how I was able to get the complusive/obsessive to stop. i trun it over and ask for
help from my HP.

Thr tools i use is to as my H/P to remove these obsessive
thought as if i would do if i have a carving.
Sometimes i can't let once my mind starts spining.
Foregiveness helps to get me to let go.

F-it....is the short form of the serenity prayer.
it works better for me in the heat of the moment.
The bottom line or end result is that i let go or drop it.
I'm don't get so damn spiritual and wanna pray during
a conflict. Principle before personality.

nogard

Thanks for the info Sat.

lostmdboy

MAn !!! Resentments are such a huge problem for me. I have been really struggling with them Lately. They seem to just rule my life. I am getting better a t recognizing them, but some times the get out of control before I know it. I thought sobriety was just about not drinking?!? Geeze

Smyle

I too have been struggling with resentments but have been working through them ....

they are like poison

~B

Golfman

Kevin,

As long as I've been around the rooms of AA I've never heard it put this way before. Brilliant!!!!!

By the way, I'm going to snatch this and use at my next meeting! How brilliant they will think I am....my ego will be running wild. I will of course let everyone know that I heard it from a mate in NZ.

Thanks again Kevin,
steady eddie

BrandiK

I always heard "Resentment just means I didn't get my way" I love what you said, so true!!! I'll have to share that one!

nocellphone

I heard a little old recovering alcoholic put it this way once:

[old man voice] Having a resentment is like peeing in yer pants in a roomful of people. Everybody can see it, but you're the only one who feels it...[/old man voice]

SaTiT

I think sometimes people get confuse about anger and a resentment.

Of course we want to aviod negative emotions, but to deny it is not healthy.
Anger is just another emotion. if I continue to stuff my feelings
it's basically doing the samething when i was drinking...i numb myself
out to cope. Eventaully I'll trun into a fire cracker or a walking time bomb
or eventaully trun into a resentment if we don't deal with it.

Most women probably have a harder time when dealing with anger,
becuase they where taught to not get angery and be a good litttle girl
and behave, so they havn't really have any practice of processing
anger.
Men on the other end of the spectrum are allow to act out as boys
becuase it's a manly thing and have out burst to the extreem...but have a harder time crying.

Getting sober ment that we are going to feel our emotions...dah
I found ways of releasing my anger in non-dystructive ways.
I play my guitar and just crank up the volume and let it rip to relaese energy,
truning a negative into a possitive.

Another simple excersize i did was to just make a fist as hard as i can.
I can feel the tensions build up in my body , then I open my hand, let go
I can feel the release. It's so i can recognize the signs the my body
is telling me. This way when i do feel tension building up, i'll just
pick up my guitar or do whatever activities to release built up tensions.
Preventive maintenance, so i don't let poison build up inside of me.
Nothing more than just washing off the daily dust and grime of living,
becuase not everything is going to go my way and i get angery sometimes.
I'm not sitting on a mountain top somewhere and not having to deal with society.

On a spiritaul level...it's acceptence, throught working the 4th step.
I love myself. I accept me all of me , the good , the bad and the ugly.
I capitalize on my assets and work on my liabilties.
my ahha moment was. I always ask god to accept me as i am...god did.
The question was...when the hell was i going to accept me as i am ?

scootinbabe

i am still learning to recognize my anger and my resentments. it certainly goes back to that old peeling the onion example. oi vey.

Luckyv2

Have to really keep it simple for this addict....

Resentment represents the past.......
Anger represents the present.....
Fear represents the future.....

nogard

Your welcome eddie Its Australia actually, much nicer than NZ

Kevin

Golfman

Kevin,

So sorry for the confusion. As you can tell, I'm not up on cities in your neck of the woods. I guess I assumed NZ because you and Dubs met recently. Lesson learned. Thanks for setting me straight.

By the way Kevin, I appreciate so much what you have to share. I't obvious you have much to offer and I admire your way of putting things in perspective. Have a great day...er, night?!

Ed

nogard

Thanks ed, its Wed Morning here