TOPIC: Do People Pi** You Off? What Do U Do To Get Even Or Let It Go?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Baton Rouge, La.
Posts: 15,234
TOPIC: Do People Pi** You Off? What Do U Do To Get Even Or Let It Go?
Hi Im Sharon and Im an Alcoholic.
By the Grace of my HP and people
like you here in SR I havent had a
drink of alcohol since 8-11-90.
For that and you I am truely
grateful.
So do people pi** you off? Do
they know what buttons to
pish to tick you off?
Do you hate it when people
TELL you what to do? Or
is it the tone of their voice
that turns you off from them.
What happens when they pi**
you off? Do you get fumming mad?
Do you get all hot and bothered?
Do you storm away, kick, scream,
turn ur music up loud?
Crank that sucker up.
Or do have that control button
inside you that knows exactly
what to do in a situation like that.
To calmly let go. To say the Serenity
Prayer right quick? To talk to someone
right quick about it so u dont have
to carry that extra weight on ur
shoulders?
What's the best solution in a case
when someone pisses you off?
Share your own ESH with me and others
so we can know how to squash this
problem while in its early stages of
anger.
By the Grace of my HP and people
like you here in SR I havent had a
drink of alcohol since 8-11-90.
For that and you I am truely
grateful.
So do people pi** you off? Do
they know what buttons to
pish to tick you off?
Do you hate it when people
TELL you what to do? Or
is it the tone of their voice
that turns you off from them.
What happens when they pi**
you off? Do you get fumming mad?
Do you get all hot and bothered?
Do you storm away, kick, scream,
turn ur music up loud?
Crank that sucker up.
Or do have that control button
inside you that knows exactly
what to do in a situation like that.
To calmly let go. To say the Serenity
Prayer right quick? To talk to someone
right quick about it so u dont have
to carry that extra weight on ur
shoulders?
What's the best solution in a case
when someone pisses you off?
Share your own ESH with me and others
so we can know how to squash this
problem while in its early stages of
anger.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Murfreesboro, TN
Posts: 595
I let people pi55 me off for so long. It was exhausting letting them take up space in my brain. It was worse that I didn't collect any rent for it. I might have felt better if I made a little money on the rent.
The program of AA teaches me that I should look at those people as sick people. I will be honest...I don't look at them as sick. I just say to myself if they want to be a55holes, I think I'll let them. I either tune them out if I have spend time in a room with them, or I simply walk away. My time is too valuable, not that I'm that important, to spend worrying about what people say and do. No...that's a fib. Sometimes I do let them get to me and I do spend time tearing them a new one in my head. I feel so much better.
Progress, not perfection.
Ed
The program of AA teaches me that I should look at those people as sick people. I will be honest...I don't look at them as sick. I just say to myself if they want to be a55holes, I think I'll let them. I either tune them out if I have spend time in a room with them, or I simply walk away. My time is too valuable, not that I'm that important, to spend worrying about what people say and do. No...that's a fib. Sometimes I do let them get to me and I do spend time tearing them a new one in my head. I feel so much better.
Progress, not perfection.
Ed
Member
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Toronto Ontario
Posts: 336
When I get pi**ed off at people it's hard loud angry music for me. A little Disturbed, White Zombie, Brides of Destruction, Linkin Park, that kinda stuff... gets the agression out.
Then, breathe.
Then, breathe.
everything is already ok
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Melbourne Victoria Australia
Posts: 19,789
when I get peed off these days I know that it has something to do with me and regardless of my initial reaction I look at myself.
Everything that I notice has a home in me somewhere.
Everything that I notice has a home in me somewhere.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Baton Rouge, La.
Posts: 15,234
Why do I let people get to me?
Do I seem that vunerable? Is it
because im that nice to people
and allow them to take advantage
of me?
What happened to the saying...
Do unto others as you'd have then
do unto you?
Or
Treat others the way ud want to
be treated....
And I do treat others fairly and with
kindness....un less they are snobbish
to me or try to order me around like
as if i was a child.....
Thoughts of the way I was being treated
in the bank still haunts me...I try to let
it go and then i take it back...knowing
that thinking about what has been done
is done....still...it hurts....
The people i worked at for most of my training
were awesome people to work with....their
kindness and helpfulness was just what
i needed. However that branch wasnt where
i was assigned to....and working with the
back stabbers , even just for a short amount
of time, destroyed my thoughts of ever
making in the finacial world extremely
dismal.
Then i keep wondering "what if" What if they
allowed me to work at the branch i liked?
Would things be different today? Would I still
be working in the bank?
I know thru constant prayers, I asked for
His guidance and His Will be done....He
knew how unhappy I was where I was at
and therefore the decision was made to
pull me from banking....
We always take something from an experience....
and now i wonder what did i learn from all this.
Ok, im getting off track here....sort of...it still
pi55es me off of how unjust i was treated.
Ok, Sharon its time to let it go and look to
whats ahead of you.
Your right....waiting to hear word on my
interview from Friday for a Mental Health
Tech Position I have been applying for
at a nearby hospital.
Again..this is His Will be done.
Thanks for letting me share.....
I feel a tad better.
Do I seem that vunerable? Is it
because im that nice to people
and allow them to take advantage
of me?
What happened to the saying...
Do unto others as you'd have then
do unto you?
Or
Treat others the way ud want to
be treated....
And I do treat others fairly and with
kindness....un less they are snobbish
to me or try to order me around like
as if i was a child.....
Thoughts of the way I was being treated
in the bank still haunts me...I try to let
it go and then i take it back...knowing
that thinking about what has been done
is done....still...it hurts....
The people i worked at for most of my training
were awesome people to work with....their
kindness and helpfulness was just what
i needed. However that branch wasnt where
i was assigned to....and working with the
back stabbers , even just for a short amount
of time, destroyed my thoughts of ever
making in the finacial world extremely
dismal.
Then i keep wondering "what if" What if they
allowed me to work at the branch i liked?
Would things be different today? Would I still
be working in the bank?
I know thru constant prayers, I asked for
His guidance and His Will be done....He
knew how unhappy I was where I was at
and therefore the decision was made to
pull me from banking....
We always take something from an experience....
and now i wonder what did i learn from all this.
Ok, im getting off track here....sort of...it still
pi55es me off of how unjust i was treated.
Ok, Sharon its time to let it go and look to
whats ahead of you.
Your right....waiting to hear word on my
interview from Friday for a Mental Health
Tech Position I have been applying for
at a nearby hospital.
Again..this is His Will be done.
Thanks for letting me share.....
I feel a tad better.
Follow Directions!
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Fredericksburg, Va.
Posts: 9,730
You know I have done very well in the anger department since I got sober, sadly last night in a split second I reacted to someone elses physical anger directed at me and retaliated, in a split second, the physical harm I caused I can not take back, I have apologized profusley and now I was wrong even though I was physically assaulted first.
I simply pray that this person I hurt learns from this that not every one can strike back and then NOT continue in their retaliation. I did, may others do not, they carry the retalitaion much further.
I do regret that split second of lost control, but I thank God that he gave me the control to stop the split second after I started, there was a day and a time I would not have stopped.
How do I deal with my anger, well except for that split second slip, prayer, meditation, and working and living the steps I have learned in AA.
I simply pray that this person I hurt learns from this that not every one can strike back and then NOT continue in their retaliation. I did, may others do not, they carry the retalitaion much further.
I do regret that split second of lost control, but I thank God that he gave me the control to stop the split second after I started, there was a day and a time I would not have stopped.
How do I deal with my anger, well except for that split second slip, prayer, meditation, and working and living the steps I have learned in AA.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Southern Oregon
Posts: 1,768
Funny this thread should pop up this morning. Last night after bowling me and hubby went down to my daughters house for a bbq. Well my son inlaw is an alcoholic. He was plastered pretty good. Even before bowling (they went with us)
I stepped outside to where the guys were to smoke. He was doing the "magpie" thing.....(going on about the same subject all night and saying the same things over and over) and saying things that I disagreed with.
I had to let in go in one ear and out the other, as I could see myself getting riled up over his subject. Now if I were drunk, I would have joined in the debate gladly! It felt good to be able to let it go and not get upset.
LOL, as we were leaving, he apologized for his behavior. I said "not to worry, been there & done that!"
For me, last night was a big eye opener. I was seeing myself in him as the drunk person I used to be and never want to go back to being that person.
After sleeping on it, I'm glad that everything happened last night the way that it did. It was a huge learning experience for me.
I stepped outside to where the guys were to smoke. He was doing the "magpie" thing.....(going on about the same subject all night and saying the same things over and over) and saying things that I disagreed with.
I had to let in go in one ear and out the other, as I could see myself getting riled up over his subject. Now if I were drunk, I would have joined in the debate gladly! It felt good to be able to let it go and not get upset.
LOL, as we were leaving, he apologized for his behavior. I said "not to worry, been there & done that!"
For me, last night was a big eye opener. I was seeing myself in him as the drunk person I used to be and never want to go back to being that person.
After sleeping on it, I'm glad that everything happened last night the way that it did. It was a huge learning experience for me.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: MA.
Posts: 1,719
Hmmm...
Anger is an emotion that I have to work very hard to keep it in check.
When I was drinking, I dealt with anger two ways.
1.) I would grab someone by the neck and choke the #### out of them.
2.) I would say things that were not NICE.
In sobriety, I have learned to feel the anger and work through it no matter
how difficult the situation is. I no longer feel the need to run from anger. All
situations can be dealt with tact. I am no longer a raging LUNATIC!!
Anger is an emotion that I have to work very hard to keep it in check.
When I was drinking, I dealt with anger two ways.
1.) I would grab someone by the neck and choke the #### out of them.
2.) I would say things that were not NICE.
In sobriety, I have learned to feel the anger and work through it no matter
how difficult the situation is. I no longer feel the need to run from anger. All
situations can be dealt with tact. I am no longer a raging LUNATIC!!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Baton Rouge, La.
Posts: 15,234
Im glad ur anger didnt cause more harm than necessary.
Whether it be verbal or physical pain or abuse...neither
is the real answer to our problems....those 2 only cause
more hurt than anything....and doesnt solve anything.
For me...like yesterday...i had someone TELL me not
to do something.... I emmediately thought...who the he**
are u to TELL me what to do....I already know what to
do....Then i correct my mistake while this anger is festering
inside me....now i want to retaliate by throwing it back in
that persons face....
How rude you talk to me like that....ive been around the
block a few times and im not stupid....
See....i can get pretty fired up when someone pi55es me off.
So what do i do....lol
I come on here to vent and let go of my deep seeded
anger....
Do I feel better....well...im laughing about it...lol
Whether it be verbal or physical pain or abuse...neither
is the real answer to our problems....those 2 only cause
more hurt than anything....and doesnt solve anything.
For me...like yesterday...i had someone TELL me not
to do something.... I emmediately thought...who the he**
are u to TELL me what to do....I already know what to
do....Then i correct my mistake while this anger is festering
inside me....now i want to retaliate by throwing it back in
that persons face....
How rude you talk to me like that....ive been around the
block a few times and im not stupid....
See....i can get pretty fired up when someone pi55es me off.
So what do i do....lol
I come on here to vent and let go of my deep seeded
anger....
Do I feel better....well...im laughing about it...lol
Forum Leader
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Scottsdale, AZ, one big happy dysfunctional family!
Posts: 23,031
Originally Posted by nogard 
when I get peed off these days I know that it has something to do with me and regardless of my initial reaction I look at myself.
Everything that I notice has a home in me somewhere.
Everything that I notice has a home in me somewhere.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Baton Rouge, La.
Posts: 15,234
Thats a good reminder about looking at ourselves or
whats really going on with ME.
Yesterday I was doing what i normally do and when i
emmediately shared what i wanted, i got this message
TELLING ME to change something.....not politely saying
this, or calmly saying this, or pleasantly saying this....
But to me i gathered it was an order to do something....
Im trying not to go into to much detail because I dont
want to PI55 another off.
Why do people have to talk down to people like they
do.....wouldnt u get better results if u suggest instead
of TELLING someone what to do....
And this is everywheres...not just in one place....
So, what was it in myself that i needed to look at when
i felt pi55ed at this person....
Maybe it is something that i continue to carry with me
from my childhood....Because of the verbal and physical
abuse i sustained by my mom....I swored when she hit
me the last time at 18 yrs old, that NO one would
EVER tell me what to do again.
It that the issue that i keep harboring..and how in the
heck can i get over this...? Isnt it about time after
all these yrs to let that crap go?
I do know people out in the world are not gonna change for
me...it has to be my acceptance of them....
Even if they pi55 on me i have to accept it????
whats really going on with ME.
Yesterday I was doing what i normally do and when i
emmediately shared what i wanted, i got this message
TELLING ME to change something.....not politely saying
this, or calmly saying this, or pleasantly saying this....
But to me i gathered it was an order to do something....
Im trying not to go into to much detail because I dont
want to PI55 another off.
Why do people have to talk down to people like they
do.....wouldnt u get better results if u suggest instead
of TELLING someone what to do....
And this is everywheres...not just in one place....
So, what was it in myself that i needed to look at when
i felt pi55ed at this person....
Maybe it is something that i continue to carry with me
from my childhood....Because of the verbal and physical
abuse i sustained by my mom....I swored when she hit
me the last time at 18 yrs old, that NO one would
EVER tell me what to do again.
It that the issue that i keep harboring..and how in the
heck can i get over this...? Isnt it about time after
all these yrs to let that crap go?
I do know people out in the world are not gonna change for
me...it has to be my acceptance of them....
Even if they pi55 on me i have to accept it????
Member
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Cleveland Ohio
Posts: 290
what about irrational anger... like...
My neighbor at work pops her gum in the afternoon... drives me freaky nuts...
My wife breaths through her nose at night and it sound like she is breathing thorugh a straw... I get so mad I drives me nutz...
Those fidgety people at AA meetings who insist on breaking their styrophome cup up into microscopic little bits.. the whole time making the cup make those styrophomy squeaky sounds...
... I have a couple of those solved... like I just wear foamy ear plugs at work and to bed... but how do I set foot in a theater where people are eating popcorn without going nutz...
My neighbor at work pops her gum in the afternoon... drives me freaky nuts...
My wife breaths through her nose at night and it sound like she is breathing thorugh a straw... I get so mad I drives me nutz...
Those fidgety people at AA meetings who insist on breaking their styrophome cup up into microscopic little bits.. the whole time making the cup make those styrophomy squeaky sounds...
... I have a couple of those solved... like I just wear foamy ear plugs at work and to bed... but how do I set foot in a theater where people are eating popcorn without going nutz...
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Baton Rouge, La.
Posts: 15,234
I think i can handle those little irritants...Notice i said
i think i can...i think i can....like the "little engine that could."
I couldnt handle my neighbor back in Houston that would
deliberatley put her hose in my yard....No i NEVER did that
to her...and when i confronted her about it...she got pi55ed
at me....lol
Then she loved to water my drive way.....lol I confronted
her saying in a nice voice....Thank u for watering my drive
way....lol a minute later she said ...why dont u do something
about the squirrels u r inviting in ur attic...lol
Then in my mind I yelled out...you BI***
People..!
i think i can...i think i can....like the "little engine that could."
I couldnt handle my neighbor back in Houston that would
deliberatley put her hose in my yard....No i NEVER did that
to her...and when i confronted her about it...she got pi55ed
at me....lol
Then she loved to water my drive way.....lol I confronted
her saying in a nice voice....Thank u for watering my drive
way....lol a minute later she said ...why dont u do something
about the squirrels u r inviting in ur attic...lol
Then in my mind I yelled out...you BI***
People..!
lets kill the beast
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: uk
Posts: 62
Hey debuacher .... im really sorry for tearing styrophome cup into tiny pieces promise i wont do it again LOL ...... I would to turn anger on myself and would go & get drunk but only i really suffer as a result made things 100 x worse ... still not quite mastered it .... as im still under reconstruction .....
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Baton Rouge, La.
Posts: 15,234
Speaking of styrophome cups..... lol
if u were to sit next to me then u would
catch me not tearing the cup up in small
pieces but rather I be using my finger nail
to make grooves all around the cup
yikes i cant believe i shared that with u....
But hey...im very quiet ..
if u were to sit next to me then u would
catch me not tearing the cup up in small
pieces but rather I be using my finger nail
to make grooves all around the cup
yikes i cant believe i shared that with u....
But hey...im very quiet ..
Member
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Essex,UK
Posts: 5
Hi, I get so mad sometimes its like a red mist descends....I cant control it...as I have got older I have improved at working out the danger signs...my anger can be so irrational but it usually is triggered by people saying something about me personally or critisising my work....it really does depend what day of the week you get me on.....you could get lucky and it be one of my good days where I wont react...
Angry drunk me is a different kettle of fish altogether....completely uncontrollable and impossible to pacify........i have scared many people when I am drunk.....thankfully I never harmed anybody....but psychological damage is much longer lasting and something that I eternally regret...
I read this thread with much interest
Angry drunk me is a different kettle of fish altogether....completely uncontrollable and impossible to pacify........i have scared many people when I am drunk.....thankfully I never harmed anybody....but psychological damage is much longer lasting and something that I eternally regret...
I read this thread with much interest
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