a lil update...
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Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: somewhere, out there...
Posts: 512
a lil update...
just a quick update - first of all i have to say that dcfs iin IL is the most inept state agency i have had ever had to deal with - i'm writing a letter to the governors office and will file complaints...
it is saturday - i have custody of sisters lil guys 2 & 4 - so, still haven't talked to sister - dcfs in IL called me back on Thursday to say they can't tell me anything *privacy issues* - i have the kids in IN so i should take care of *stuff* here - my sisters bf (lil guys dad) called thursday later afternoon RAGING - he was insane - said he *thought i was just taking the kids so he and sister could have a break - the kids are lazy and that is the only reason the house wasn't clean (the older boys and lil guys made the house so messy that sister and bf had to move into the basement - apparently kids are responsible for cleaning and cooking - isn't that just mind boggkling - he really believed what he was saying i think) - i'm not helping by calling police and dcfs - i'm just brainwashing the kids - im such a biatch - blah blah blah - i told him i was taping his call and he hung up - but not before telling me that *if i don't have his kids home by 12 on sunday he is coming to pick em up and will kill me* - needless to say i called the police and filed a protection order - because i don't have *legal* custody police told me to contact child protective services here in IN - WHAT a difference in state agencies - they came out immediately to interview the kids - IL still hadn't talked to them and i called IL sunday at 9 in the morning - i didn't get the protective order as he is not my ex husband - he doesn't have a mortgage to my home - and he only threatened me once - hmpphhh......
so today - here is how things stand - child protective services here in IN told me that the kids were obviously neglected and now that they have jurisdiction since they have a file - if sister and bf should show up here we call police - call cps attorney (have her cell phone #) and they can't take kids - thank god for child protective services in hamilton county IN...
the kids are doing great - they haven't talked to sister or bf - sometimes the kids ask if mom and dad are still sick and i just tell htem that i think they are - but maybe one day they'll get better - but until then they will stay here and this is their house too...
need to get to some other stuff but wanted to give a little update - thanks again everyone - oh yeah i have an attorney and we will do what needs to be done...
godspeed,
s
it is saturday - i have custody of sisters lil guys 2 & 4 - so, still haven't talked to sister - dcfs in IL called me back on Thursday to say they can't tell me anything *privacy issues* - i have the kids in IN so i should take care of *stuff* here - my sisters bf (lil guys dad) called thursday later afternoon RAGING - he was insane - said he *thought i was just taking the kids so he and sister could have a break - the kids are lazy and that is the only reason the house wasn't clean (the older boys and lil guys made the house so messy that sister and bf had to move into the basement - apparently kids are responsible for cleaning and cooking - isn't that just mind boggkling - he really believed what he was saying i think) - i'm not helping by calling police and dcfs - i'm just brainwashing the kids - im such a biatch - blah blah blah - i told him i was taping his call and he hung up - but not before telling me that *if i don't have his kids home by 12 on sunday he is coming to pick em up and will kill me* - needless to say i called the police and filed a protection order - because i don't have *legal* custody police told me to contact child protective services here in IN - WHAT a difference in state agencies - they came out immediately to interview the kids - IL still hadn't talked to them and i called IL sunday at 9 in the morning - i didn't get the protective order as he is not my ex husband - he doesn't have a mortgage to my home - and he only threatened me once - hmpphhh......
so today - here is how things stand - child protective services here in IN told me that the kids were obviously neglected and now that they have jurisdiction since they have a file - if sister and bf should show up here we call police - call cps attorney (have her cell phone #) and they can't take kids - thank god for child protective services in hamilton county IN...
the kids are doing great - they haven't talked to sister or bf - sometimes the kids ask if mom and dad are still sick and i just tell htem that i think they are - but maybe one day they'll get better - but until then they will stay here and this is their house too...
need to get to some other stuff but wanted to give a little update - thanks again everyone - oh yeah i have an attorney and we will do what needs to be done...
godspeed,
s
Member
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 1,358
Were you really taping the conversation, or is that only something that you told him? If you really were taping it, I suggest making copies and keeping them in separate, but safe places for future reference. 'Ya never know when it might come in handy.
Sounds like things are coming together for the kids, thanks to you! You've done great!
Sounds like things are coming together for the kids, thanks to you! You've done great!
Royalty
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Ohio
Posts: 366
Can you file an emergency temp custody order? You need to have something legal in case of emergency.
I agree that you needed to take the kids, but without a stupid piece of paper, it's kidnapping in the court. If their father shows up, and you don't have something signed by a judge, he can take the children, and calling the police doesn't usually have any effect.....it seems they just don't want to get involved in civil matters.
Because the children live in another state, I am surprised that your state is stepping in ..... (unless I misunderstood). To file something, you will more than likely need to file it in the county that the children were living.
You have your hands full, kudos for stepping up and doing what's right.
I agree that you needed to take the kids, but without a stupid piece of paper, it's kidnapping in the court. If their father shows up, and you don't have something signed by a judge, he can take the children, and calling the police doesn't usually have any effect.....it seems they just don't want to get involved in civil matters.
Because the children live in another state, I am surprised that your state is stepping in ..... (unless I misunderstood). To file something, you will more than likely need to file it in the county that the children were living.
You have your hands full, kudos for stepping up and doing what's right.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Booneyville USA
Posts: 246
Good for you for taking action! So many people just sit and watch and wonder "what should I do?" but never do anything! Those kids are so lucky to have someone like you in their lives! I can't believe he was blaming those little babies for the state of the house!!! What kind of parent allows the child to mess things up so badly THEY (the supposed adults) have to move into the basement?! Especially a 2 and 4 yo?!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: somewhere, out there...
Posts: 512
hi all - just wanted to answer some of your questions real quick (yesterday i apparently got to lengthy - sr signed me off and my post was gone - so i'll try n be brief 
) yeah right...
yes we are in another state - it seems states can't share any information (i swear that will be my next cause - making child protection a federal cause so the *best interest of the child* is helping the child wherever that child may be - no one will share info - it sucks) and we do have to file for emergency custody - but...
the police will get involved - sometimes you get someone on your side that can push the right buttons, you know? even though my order of protection was denied it was filed - and because hamilton county got involved in the case it is in their jurisdiction - (IL dcfs<dept. of child & family services> workers requested IN cps<child protective services> to investigage *on their behalf* it will transfer here) or so they say - but we do need to file an emergency custody order - my mom is going to dcfs in lake county IL (each county in IL won't share info) to file an emergency order - my ex bil who has the two other boys is doing the same thing - in the county he lives with the boys now - no one is sure what to do in this situation - my sister and her bf not speaking to anyone doesn't help things either - my ex bil is going to ask his atty about abandonment since sister hasn't taken one phone call from him or the school all week...
i hope that my mom filing something is going to help (IL dcfs workers suggested doing this since my mom actually removed lil guys from the home) - i don't know if they are in jail, dead, or just getting high (bil thought that i was taking the kids so he and sister could just take a break - he really thinks once a month or so they should just do the drugs and party cuz boy being a parent is stressful?!!!?? wtf?????? m- he's an imbicile...
this weekend was stressful - not with the lil guys, they are doing great - it was my daughters 13th bday - she had a surprise party thrown by some of her friends who were supposed to be having it at their home (uncle died so we moved party here at the last minute) - between filing papers and buying streamers and balloons it was stressful - and bieng in another state makes me feel alone in all of this sometimes - and we have our moments of possessiveness between my two year old an d two year old nephew but i have two legs and arms so they both fit - when they want to - i will ask for some sort of counseling for all the kids - my 17 yr old just assumed we would do the right thing and take the kids - we did that - now we need to figure out what to do next - my husband is being incredible - drinking hasn't been an issue - maybe this is gods way of showing us where the focus on our lives needs to be - the children - in our immediate families or in our lives - period...
i ho pe this isn't too long - i will update after things happen this morning - that's the hard part - having no idea what's going on in the other half of this equation - but i guess that's what giving it up to my higher power is all about and just dealing with the *what it is*...
i just have to remember what i just wrote...
love,
s
) yeah right...yes we are in another state - it seems states can't share any information (i swear that will be my next cause - making child protection a federal cause so the *best interest of the child* is helping the child wherever that child may be - no one will share info - it sucks) and we do have to file for emergency custody - but...
the police will get involved - sometimes you get someone on your side that can push the right buttons, you know? even though my order of protection was denied it was filed - and because hamilton county got involved in the case it is in their jurisdiction - (IL dcfs<dept. of child & family services> workers requested IN cps<child protective services> to investigage *on their behalf* it will transfer here) or so they say - but we do need to file an emergency custody order - my mom is going to dcfs in lake county IL (each county in IL won't share info) to file an emergency order - my ex bil who has the two other boys is doing the same thing - in the county he lives with the boys now - no one is sure what to do in this situation - my sister and her bf not speaking to anyone doesn't help things either - my ex bil is going to ask his atty about abandonment since sister hasn't taken one phone call from him or the school all week...
i hope that my mom filing something is going to help (IL dcfs workers suggested doing this since my mom actually removed lil guys from the home) - i don't know if they are in jail, dead, or just getting high (bil thought that i was taking the kids so he and sister could just take a break - he really thinks once a month or so they should just do the drugs and party cuz boy being a parent is stressful?!!!?? wtf?????? m- he's an imbicile...
this weekend was stressful - not with the lil guys, they are doing great - it was my daughters 13th bday - she had a surprise party thrown by some of her friends who were supposed to be having it at their home (uncle died so we moved party here at the last minute) - between filing papers and buying streamers and balloons it was stressful - and bieng in another state makes me feel alone in all of this sometimes - and we have our moments of possessiveness between my two year old an d two year old nephew but i have two legs and arms so they both fit - when they want to - i will ask for some sort of counseling for all the kids - my 17 yr old just assumed we would do the right thing and take the kids - we did that - now we need to figure out what to do next - my husband is being incredible - drinking hasn't been an issue - maybe this is gods way of showing us where the focus on our lives needs to be - the children - in our immediate families or in our lives - period...
i ho pe this isn't too long - i will update after things happen this morning - that's the hard part - having no idea what's going on in the other half of this equation - but i guess that's what giving it up to my higher power is all about and just dealing with the *what it is*...
i just have to remember what i just wrote...
love,
s
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