Dolorosa

Do you ever find yourself reading all the newbie posts in the recovery forums, to see if by some miracle your A is there? Wishful thinking, I know. It's not that I want him back - I don't. But it would be nice to know he finally admitted to his addictions. Our children need him....sober. Oh well. I don't see that happening anytime soon.

embraced2000

lololo....yes rosa, yes! i have done it too. like mine would do that!!!! he doesn't want the help enough to power up a computer.

Astro

I'm an "A" in recovery, but often I hope to see my ex posting as an indication that she's seeking help through Al-Anon or CODA. I have to remind myself at those times what my sponsor always tells me: What anyone says, thinks, or does is none of my f'in business until they invite me in;-)

I really hope your A does admit he's powerless over his addiction. As a single father I know how important it is for children to have clean and sober parents.
My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Dolorosa

I'm new to all of this, and was just wondering what the difference between Al-Anon and CODA is. We have both groups in my city. And while I'm at it, can anyone tell me what to expect at these meetings? The whole 12-step thing kind of worries me. I just want to talk (and listen). LOL

Pick-a-name

Yes..I admit,I've done it ,too! haha I'd be the one needing treatment...CPR!!

dollydo

Yes, I have...I post on another forum, there are like 2,000 posts about those have recovered, now, keep in mind many are repeat posters.And most have relapsed. For family and friends there are 46,000 posts, again repeat posters, yet, the stats speak for themselves...

I have read somewhere that 8% of alcoholics and addicts are sucessful in recovery, for life,not a good ratio.

The bottom line is, the person who battles addiction will be an addict all thier life, it's just a matter if they are active or not.

All we can do is work on us, our recovery from codependence.

Dolorosa

That's a depressing statistic, Dolly. I had no idea.

StandingStrong

I've never once even thought to look to see if my XAH has posted here. For one thing, he's not recovering. For two, he'd not "waste his time" in posting here or anywhere in relation to drinking because he doesn't believe he has a drinking problem and he's not seeking recovery.
Now, I have wondered if he ever comes here and reads my posts. I believe he may know the site I come too but he doesn't know what name I use here - and I use this name nowhere else. In truth though, I don't even believe he'd waste his time to come see what I'd write.

Nuudawn

I can't say I've actually "looked" for him but I am guilty of reading a post and someone believing it might be him if the logistics are right. I haven't done that in a great while tho..whew..I am progressing. The letting go is an arduous process which will get easier the more I stop "looking" for his truck around town, reading his horoscope, subtely fishing for info about him from my roommate who works with him, checking the on-line dating site I know he was on. As long as I don't "feed" it, it will die.

Pick-a-name

Same with mine.but it didn't stop me from fantasizing! haha (I did not really every expect to see him here but wondered if he did,what he would say...) I guess some of us are sicker than others! haha

WantsOut

Dolorosa, I gave up. There was a time I hoped, but not anymore.