Triggers
Sober and Free
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: bay area CA
Posts: 398
Triggers
Your supposed to stay away from your triggers, right?But what do you do if you can not stay away from your triggers? I drank at home, alone. If I am bored-trigger (and dont say stay busy, because sometimes all I can do is chase the kids and that gets mundane after a while. But I do try my hardest to keep my brain entertained), messy house-trigger, screaming kids-trigger, no plans that night or next day-trigger, cooking dinner-trigger, sports on TV-trigger (husband's, fits into the boredom catagory), I could go on and on.
Every afternoon is a struggle. And I mean, a struggle. I am normally in tears at some point, I get the shakes every afternoon. I hate, hate, hate being home. But what can I do? I can't keep the kids out and busy all day. And at som epointthey'll cry or fight...they are kids. They are great kids, but kids none the less.
I am going to as many meetings as I can, but man, the second I get home everything falls to crap. Every after noon I question if I'll make it, and litterally have to work at staying sober 5 min. at a time. Right now my husband is not drinking, and I am so thankful because I'd drink anything he'd have in the house about now.
Help!
Every afternoon is a struggle. And I mean, a struggle. I am normally in tears at some point, I get the shakes every afternoon. I hate, hate, hate being home. But what can I do? I can't keep the kids out and busy all day. And at som epointthey'll cry or fight...they are kids. They are great kids, but kids none the less.
I am going to as many meetings as I can, but man, the second I get home everything falls to crap. Every after noon I question if I'll make it, and litterally have to work at staying sober 5 min. at a time. Right now my husband is not drinking, and I am so thankful because I'd drink anything he'd have in the house about now.
Help!
Hey, Brandi-
You are doing great, hon! The first several days I felt like I was going to crawl out of my skin and chew my fingers down to the knuckles. I have been drinking limeaid concentrate mixed with club soda and a splash of pomagranite jc. (could use cranberry) I mix it all in a 2 liter bottle. The tart lime helps the craving immediately and takes away the edge- believe it or not. I have been reading books my therapist recommended and AA material. I have been on this site a lot. When I told my kids I felt I had a problem and wanted to get help I warned them I would be an emotional wreck. I told them it could go from crying to yelling... When I fly off and go mental on them I apologize and remind them things are tough and I'm really trying. So far they have been really understanding.
Take care- let me know if I can help.
xoxo T
You are doing great, hon! The first several days I felt like I was going to crawl out of my skin and chew my fingers down to the knuckles. I have been drinking limeaid concentrate mixed with club soda and a splash of pomagranite jc. (could use cranberry) I mix it all in a 2 liter bottle. The tart lime helps the craving immediately and takes away the edge- believe it or not. I have been reading books my therapist recommended and AA material. I have been on this site a lot. When I told my kids I felt I had a problem and wanted to get help I warned them I would be an emotional wreck. I told them it could go from crying to yelling... When I fly off and go mental on them I apologize and remind them things are tough and I'm really trying. So far they have been really understanding.
Take care- let me know if I can help.
xoxo T
Brandi,
I was did not drink for a year, and I remember those days when I had to deal with things. Not kids but in-laws and work. I just remember how nice it was to have a clear head. and how nice it was to wake up not sick.. try and keep that in mind.
hugs
I was did not drink for a year, and I remember those days when I had to deal with things. Not kids but in-laws and work. I just remember how nice it was to have a clear head. and how nice it was to wake up not sick.. try and keep that in mind.
hugs
Brandi,
Only have few seconds But i just wnted to let you know I know all those triggers. My lise revolvs around trigger which I now see as exxcuses to drink .
I'll post more tomorrow
Have a happy
Only have few seconds But i just wnted to let you know I know all those triggers. My lise revolvs around trigger which I now see as exxcuses to drink .
I'll post more tomorrow
Have a happy
BrandiK, most of the things in your post could be my own triggers. I've not yet found a way to get away from all that either... don't know if that's possible. I guess one thing about identifying your triggers even if you can't eliminate them, is just the realization that they are triggers and deal with that. Does that make sense? Like if my spouse is being an ass, I can see him for what he is, as ass (at times) and not drink over it. Time also helps ease cravings and triggers... at least I hope so .
I really never have cravings (thankfully). My biggest triggers are getting a ton of stuff done in a single day and then feeling hot, thirsty and like I "deserve" a drink so I can cool off, relax and wind down. My only other trigger is just plain bordum. It's amazing how wonderful it feels to be sober. clear head, plenty of motivation, feeling in control and most of all...not waking up and feeling sick as heck for days afterwards!.
- Regards, NFIS
- Regards, NFIS
Good Morning Bandi,
Yes,I definnitly fon many triggers in my everyday life, but toward the end of my drinking I found that I was finding every excuse to drkink telling myself things like I woildn't drink so much if the kids wouldn't fight, or my husband wsn't so cranky.
I totally agrre it was so hard the first few months because everyhting I did used to do buzzed, drunk, whatever you want to call it. Everything from grocery shopping to cleaning the house to even going to church (I know)
That became part of the challage, to continue my regular everyday exsistance without adding the Vodka. I also decided that If I was not going to give up the things I dredded that I was not going to give up the things i enjoy. If I could clean the house without a drink then I cold certainly keep my old friends, go to concerts, parties and remain and active participant in the traditionally drinking functions that I enjoyed all my life still enjoy.
I did give up my more recent "drinking buddy friends" but not my long aquantincecnce just because they drank.
Last Night I went to a party where everyone overr 21 drank (a good bit too) and at 11:30 I was able to drive (we stuffed 10 in my Truck) a wholebuch of us to the ball dropping firework dispaly in my town.
And today I am having all my hangover friends over for Turkey dinner because I feel good enought to cook and they don't.
Sorry I rambled, but hang in there soon you will relize that it not as hard as it seemed it would be to get past those triggers.
Happy New Year
Yes,I definnitly fon many triggers in my everyday life, but toward the end of my drinking I found that I was finding every excuse to drkink telling myself things like I woildn't drink so much if the kids wouldn't fight, or my husband wsn't so cranky.
I totally agrre it was so hard the first few months because everyhting I did used to do buzzed, drunk, whatever you want to call it. Everything from grocery shopping to cleaning the house to even going to church (I know)
That became part of the challage, to continue my regular everyday exsistance without adding the Vodka. I also decided that If I was not going to give up the things I dredded that I was not going to give up the things i enjoy. If I could clean the house without a drink then I cold certainly keep my old friends, go to concerts, parties and remain and active participant in the traditionally drinking functions that I enjoyed all my life still enjoy.
I did give up my more recent "drinking buddy friends" but not my long aquantincecnce just because they drank.
Last Night I went to a party where everyone overr 21 drank (a good bit too) and at 11:30 I was able to drive (we stuffed 10 in my Truck) a wholebuch of us to the ball dropping firework dispaly in my town.
And today I am having all my hangover friends over for Turkey dinner because I feel good enought to cook and they don't.
Sorry I rambled, but hang in there soon you will relize that it not as hard as it seemed it would be to get past those triggers.
Happy New Year
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