Dear God,
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: matawan nj
Posts: 86
Dear God,
I'm posting this tonight because I used to come on here A LOT, and it has helped me and taught me and comforted me tremendously; and because I know that there are many that can relate; and because I hope God hears me...
Dear God,
All I want for Christmas, well actually it's a really big thing to ask for; and I've asked for it plenty of times. Not to say you haven't provided, or proved yourself to me. And well I am the one who can "give" this gift to myself this year. But it's not something that I will ever finish that's why I am afraid to ask you. It's a huge favor, yet I know it's not a favor but something you want me to have. I just, well, here goes...O God, I ask of this without confidence because it's not materialistic. Part of it is confidence that I'm asking for, but that goes along with what I want. Maybe I have asked you the wrong way, or without understanding, or trust or love; but doubt, distrust, and disbelief. Which is what I want, the latter of the triple D's. I am asking for belief. In us. I commit the largest sin, almost everyday, and part of me cries and aches with pain, and the other part delights in temporary pleasure and ignorance. God I'm putting myself through suffering. I had experienced pure bliss for eight days when I made a decision to obey and trust you wholeheartedly;that you will provide and feed me when I am hungry, and I feed my soul without food. I truly never felt better in my entire life. I delight/despise, love/hate gluttony. I'm a full blown glutton. I'm not an addict, but a large glutton. I don't lack nutrients, love, respect, friends, clothing, identity, understanding, patience, will strength, I lack in belief. Everyday, as I grew in love with you, you showed me you were with me, that you would hold me, comfort me, and be there always. The more I push away, I more I ignore you and you are not there to "win" a cold heart, or a heart that is fuzzy, and uncommitted. I wish I could buy this belief, but I can, from you, and the best part about it is that it wouldn't cost a penny. But it does require trust, honesty, an open heart, and my utmost commitment; for life. I DO NOT want this struggle. What I want is the strength to overcome temptation, the belief that I am always loved, and therefore can extend loving to others, patience, kindness, forgiveness, sweetness, joy, smiles. With gluttony I am asking for depression and misery. I have ignored and lied to my self for too long. My soul is starving for natural health, life, sleep, smiles, a warm heart, and truth. It could care less about fast ways of satisfaction and afection, clothes sizes, flavors, and quantities. I'm settling. I don't settle in relationships anymore, I don't settle for what I want but I settle for who I want to be: ME. iI'm asking to purify my soul, to bring forth belief and hope and faith. Inside my heart I want to find comfort. I am ready to know me. I am ready to challenge myself, love myself, believe in myself, trust myself, forgive myself, listen to myself. Dear God, I know you listen to me and you hear me. I love you. I know I ask for signs and you give me plenty, but if you could send me an angel to guide me on my journey, to watch over me....I'd be very greatful I am thankful always, and I'd like to be able to forever show you this. I know, and need to believe this: food is fuel, that which I need very little of. God will bring oyu comfort through bringing you a beautiful life full of happiness, God fed his people twice a day, I don't need or want food, instead I need total commitment to my soul, trust, truth, temerpance and a torch to light this on fireand let it go once and for all, and love you, and believe you.
Dear God,
All I want for Christmas, well actually it's a really big thing to ask for; and I've asked for it plenty of times. Not to say you haven't provided, or proved yourself to me. And well I am the one who can "give" this gift to myself this year. But it's not something that I will ever finish that's why I am afraid to ask you. It's a huge favor, yet I know it's not a favor but something you want me to have. I just, well, here goes...O God, I ask of this without confidence because it's not materialistic. Part of it is confidence that I'm asking for, but that goes along with what I want. Maybe I have asked you the wrong way, or without understanding, or trust or love; but doubt, distrust, and disbelief. Which is what I want, the latter of the triple D's. I am asking for belief. In us. I commit the largest sin, almost everyday, and part of me cries and aches with pain, and the other part delights in temporary pleasure and ignorance. God I'm putting myself through suffering. I had experienced pure bliss for eight days when I made a decision to obey and trust you wholeheartedly;that you will provide and feed me when I am hungry, and I feed my soul without food. I truly never felt better in my entire life. I delight/despise, love/hate gluttony. I'm a full blown glutton. I'm not an addict, but a large glutton. I don't lack nutrients, love, respect, friends, clothing, identity, understanding, patience, will strength, I lack in belief. Everyday, as I grew in love with you, you showed me you were with me, that you would hold me, comfort me, and be there always. The more I push away, I more I ignore you and you are not there to "win" a cold heart, or a heart that is fuzzy, and uncommitted. I wish I could buy this belief, but I can, from you, and the best part about it is that it wouldn't cost a penny. But it does require trust, honesty, an open heart, and my utmost commitment; for life. I DO NOT want this struggle. What I want is the strength to overcome temptation, the belief that I am always loved, and therefore can extend loving to others, patience, kindness, forgiveness, sweetness, joy, smiles. With gluttony I am asking for depression and misery. I have ignored and lied to my self for too long. My soul is starving for natural health, life, sleep, smiles, a warm heart, and truth. It could care less about fast ways of satisfaction and afection, clothes sizes, flavors, and quantities. I'm settling. I don't settle in relationships anymore, I don't settle for what I want but I settle for who I want to be: ME. iI'm asking to purify my soul, to bring forth belief and hope and faith. Inside my heart I want to find comfort. I am ready to know me. I am ready to challenge myself, love myself, believe in myself, trust myself, forgive myself, listen to myself. Dear God, I know you listen to me and you hear me. I love you. I know I ask for signs and you give me plenty, but if you could send me an angel to guide me on my journey, to watch over me....I'd be very greatful I am thankful always, and I'd like to be able to forever show you this. I know, and need to believe this: food is fuel, that which I need very little of. God will bring oyu comfort through bringing you a beautiful life full of happiness, God fed his people twice a day, I don't need or want food, instead I need total commitment to my soul, trust, truth, temerpance and a torch to light this on fireand let it go once and for all, and love you, and believe you.
Thank you for the prayer.....you have a way of reaching God and I know He is listening to you every minute....................
You are in my prayers .....Hugs to you from this little Angel......who is also a litle Penguin as well that loves God with all my heart........................Keep coming back.....................Little Penguin
You are in my prayers .....Hugs to you from this little Angel......who is also a litle Penguin as well that loves God with all my heart........................Keep coming back.....................Little Penguin
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