Well, how could I resist?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2006
Location: UK
Posts: 95
Well, how could I resist?
Hello velvet42,
Our records indicate that you have never posted to our site before! Why not make your first post today by saying hello to our community in our Newcomers forum.
Why not start with your first post today and become an active part of Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information now!
Yep, that message at the top of the home page got me posting my very first thread. Been lurking for ages and been reading threads for a long time but never posted. Feel like I've got to know you all and read with abandonment when I get the chance.
Was absolutely devastated when Miracle died, felt like I knew her and wish I'd said something to Rusty. I still think about her a lot and have saved "I can only imagine" into my favourites.
What gets me is the unbelievable response to anybody's post, I really do feel like you all genuinely care and I know that's what matters. Anyway, a bit about me?
I'm 42, married to a wonderful man and have two boys aged 14 and 8. I'm happy in my life, like my job (sort of!) but I drink. I don't think it's a great deal but on reading for the past months Im beginning to think it is. I drink every night, usually a bottle of wine. I get from work at 4.00 pm and a bottle of wine lasts me until I go to bed around midnight. I don't feel drunk, hardly ever get drunk, but do drink that bottle of wine a night. My husband works away (two weeks away, two weeks home) so he always has a gin and tonic ready for me at 4.00 when I get in from work, usually another one with dinner and then the bottle of wine. So I do drink more when hubby's home. He can't drink while he's working and when he comes home I definitely drink more.
I've been thinking for a while "Am I an alcoholic, or am I just alcohol dependant?" But then I recall Earlybird saying, and this has really stuck with me, "A normal drinker doesn't google alcoholism". Above everything I've read on these boards, that has made the most impact because, of course, that's precisely how I found you.
I live in a little village by the sea in England so posting now probably won't be read until tomorrow. But just to let you know how wonderful I think this place is, you're an inspiration to so many, and I will keep posting.
Note: I haven't said I'm going to quit have I? Am I just not ready? Is that bottle of wine too much?
I think I've just answered myself.
Hugs to you all.
Velvet.
PS: Regarding the thread about how you got your name. I'm a secretary and my bosses call me the Velvet Steamroller (not sure whether that should be a compliment or not!). I'm 42, hence Velvet42
xxxx
Our records indicate that you have never posted to our site before! Why not make your first post today by saying hello to our community in our Newcomers forum.
Why not start with your first post today and become an active part of Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information now!
Yep, that message at the top of the home page got me posting my very first thread. Been lurking for ages and been reading threads for a long time but never posted. Feel like I've got to know you all and read with abandonment when I get the chance.
Was absolutely devastated when Miracle died, felt like I knew her and wish I'd said something to Rusty. I still think about her a lot and have saved "I can only imagine" into my favourites.
What gets me is the unbelievable response to anybody's post, I really do feel like you all genuinely care and I know that's what matters. Anyway, a bit about me?
I'm 42, married to a wonderful man and have two boys aged 14 and 8. I'm happy in my life, like my job (sort of!) but I drink. I don't think it's a great deal but on reading for the past months Im beginning to think it is. I drink every night, usually a bottle of wine. I get from work at 4.00 pm and a bottle of wine lasts me until I go to bed around midnight. I don't feel drunk, hardly ever get drunk, but do drink that bottle of wine a night. My husband works away (two weeks away, two weeks home) so he always has a gin and tonic ready for me at 4.00 when I get in from work, usually another one with dinner and then the bottle of wine. So I do drink more when hubby's home. He can't drink while he's working and when he comes home I definitely drink more.
I've been thinking for a while "Am I an alcoholic, or am I just alcohol dependant?" But then I recall Earlybird saying, and this has really stuck with me, "A normal drinker doesn't google alcoholism". Above everything I've read on these boards, that has made the most impact because, of course, that's precisely how I found you.
I live in a little village by the sea in England so posting now probably won't be read until tomorrow. But just to let you know how wonderful I think this place is, you're an inspiration to so many, and I will keep posting.
Note: I haven't said I'm going to quit have I? Am I just not ready? Is that bottle of wine too much?
I think I've just answered myself.
Hugs to you all.
Velvet.
PS: Regarding the thread about how you got your name. I'm a secretary and my bosses call me the Velvet Steamroller (not sure whether that should be a compliment or not!). I'm 42, hence Velvet42
xxxx
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,503
Welcome Velvet,
I am so glad you finally posted and shared some of your story with us. I hope you keep posting and learning about yourself and sharing with us. As you know, this is an awesome place.
I think of Trish/Miracle very often too.
I am so glad you finally posted and shared some of your story with us. I hope you keep posting and learning about yourself and sharing with us. As you know, this is an awesome place.
I think of Trish/Miracle very often too.
Addict
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 131
Hi Velvet,
Glad to see you here and posting after what must have been a long time just reading. Thanks for sharing your story here. Every new post I read helps in its own way, and yours is no different.
Jennifer
Glad to see you here and posting after what must have been a long time just reading. Thanks for sharing your story here. Every new post I read helps in its own way, and yours is no different.
Jennifer
Hi Velvet!!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: road to recovery
Posts: 1,689
velvet! love your "handle"!
you must have been lurking for awhile--so glad you decided to introduce yourself! regardless of anyone else's opinion, if you think you have a problem, you do. if you do, you will know it and recognize it when you are ready.
welcome and thanks for giving us a little glimpse into your life! a little village by the sea sounds so idyllic!
keep coming back!
you must have been lurking for awhile--so glad you decided to introduce yourself! regardless of anyone else's opinion, if you think you have a problem, you do. if you do, you will know it and recognize it when you are ready.
welcome and thanks for giving us a little glimpse into your life! a little village by the sea sounds so idyllic!
keep coming back!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2006
Location: UK
Posts: 95
Well, I am absolutely overwhelmed, as usual, by your responses to a first post. Here I am at 10.10 pm on a Saturday night and, yes, I've drunk that bottle of wine, and then some. If I can't be honest with you who can I be honest with, eh?
It's a Saturday, right? I can drink can't I? I've worked hard all week, hubby is away so everything is down to me. We came back from a two week holiday in Tenerife last Saturday and all I've done is washing and ironing, gone back to work a whole week so I deserve a drink don't I?
I've read this over and over again on here, I feel like I'm not alone. I've read nearly all the recovery stories (2dayzmuse your story was awesome and made me cry).
Thank you all for not making me feel like I'm alone.
Dee Dee - I've read right through your thread about your son - I can only imagine. Thank you especially for welcoming me, thank you all.
(((hugs)))
It's a Saturday, right? I can drink can't I? I've worked hard all week, hubby is away so everything is down to me. We came back from a two week holiday in Tenerife last Saturday and all I've done is washing and ironing, gone back to work a whole week so I deserve a drink don't I?
I've read this over and over again on here, I feel like I'm not alone. I've read nearly all the recovery stories (2dayzmuse your story was awesome and made me cry).
Thank you all for not making me feel like I'm alone.
Dee Dee - I've read right through your thread about your son - I can only imagine. Thank you especially for welcoming me, thank you all.
(((hugs)))
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
Hugs Velvet..
Alcoholism is a disease and it is progressive.
I suggest you get more factual info
My favorite book on alcoholism is
"Under The Influence"
and it has a sequel..."Beyond The Influence"
Both can be ordered from Amazon...
Take care...
Alcoholism is a disease and it is progressive.
I suggest you get more factual info
My favorite book on alcoholism is
"Under The Influence"
and it has a sequel..."Beyond The Influence"
Both can be ordered from Amazon...
Take care...
Member
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Ohio
Posts: 859
VelvetGood mornin.....(at least mornin where I am LOL)
Originally Posted by velvet42
It's a Saturday, right? I can drink can't I? I've worked hard all week, hubby is away so everything is down to me. We came back from a two week holiday in Tenerife last Saturday and all I've done is washing and ironing, gone back to work a whole week so I deserve a drink don't I?
Personally, my E voice is so good with the trickery of justifying it all to me...."I have done all the washing and ironing, worked all week, I deserve a drink!!!!!" See the difference when you change the ? to a !!!!! at the end of that statement?
I wish you the best!!! Im so glad your here!!!! I personally cannot taper or just cut back, I have tried and one or two = 10 or more. I have no self control which really makes me sad and angry at myself. I hate feeling like I am weak, but I am learning to allow myself to be realistic! Sorry I got side tracked here, thanks for letting me share!
Liss
Member
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Vancouver, BC
Posts: 161
Hi Velvet
I just read your post.
Back in February when I admitted to my therapist that I was an alcoholic. When I quit/relapsed and quit/relapsed a few times - in a session we were talking about triggers. And like Lollipop said I drank no matter what the reason:
I drank when stressed
I drank when happy
I drank when angry
I drank because it was Saturday or Friday
I drank when bored etc.
Didn't matter. I had to come to the point that where I just couldn't justify it anymore. That was my experience.
Welcome to the site. You've come to a great place!!!!
I just read your post.
Back in February when I admitted to my therapist that I was an alcoholic. When I quit/relapsed and quit/relapsed a few times - in a session we were talking about triggers. And like Lollipop said I drank no matter what the reason:
I drank when stressed
I drank when happy
I drank when angry
I drank because it was Saturday or Friday
I drank when bored etc.
Didn't matter. I had to come to the point that where I just couldn't justify it anymore. That was my experience.
Welcome to the site. You've come to a great place!!!!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2006
Location: UK
Posts: 95
Lollipop - thanks for your reply. Guess I am justifying, I've done all the mundane jobs so now I deserve a drink! You didn't get side-tracked - thank you
Velvet - thanks for welcoming me! I was very worried about my name because I knew there was a velvet on here and didn't want you to feel I was stealing your name. I'm velvet because my bosses call me Velvet Steamroller, and 42 for my age. Hope you're not cheesed at me!
Erin- yes, I too drink no matter what the reason, happy, sad, worked all day, stressed, etc etc etc
I know I'm in a great place folks, I feel at home
Velvet - thanks for welcoming me! I was very worried about my name because I knew there was a velvet on here and didn't want you to feel I was stealing your name. I'm velvet because my bosses call me Velvet Steamroller, and 42 for my age. Hope you're not cheesed at me!
Erin- yes, I too drink no matter what the reason, happy, sad, worked all day, stressed, etc etc etc
I know I'm in a great place folks, I feel at home
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