Oceanspring

Hi
I'm new at this. And I'm on day 23. Trying this by myself. I have a husband and a 3 yr old. I have been diagnosed with anxiety disorder, which I never really gave much thought as it was who I am. Still is. I grew up with an anxious & raging mother and an alcoholic father. I recognize their traits in myself. I do not consider myself an alcoholic per say but I was heading straight in that direction. I have been drinking since my mid-twenties (I'm 40) and it got to where I had 4 to 8 drinks per night. Now, back on day 23. For the past few days, I've experienced such anxiety displayed by irritation, mood swings, rage triggered by anything..the smallest thing. Almost like feeling that everything is unfair, that I can't express myself, being misunderstood.. I don't know. It gets to the point where want that drink really bad. Is it possible that drinking alleviated all those feelings before, that it was such a constance in my life that I never really felt it? I'm at a loss, is it withdrawal? Am I going nuts? Am I seriously going to be stuck like this, wanting to kill someone because a fork got misplaced? It sounds funny, but it's affecting our whole family, making me withdraw from them to ride the wave. Any thoughts or I am imagining things? Speaking of which, for the past few days, I think I've hallucinated hearing someone talk when the whole house is quiet. Anyway.

OceanSpring

biminiblue

Roller coaster emotions, intense anger/frustration/anxiety and hallucinations? Yup. I went through the same thing.

It's really common, all those things. It dies down. You're not going crazy. The anxiety is the one that took the longest for me - nearly a year for it to completely go away, but by about three months it was very manageable. And yeah, alcohol makes anxiety way worse in the long run. It stops it while drinking but then comes back with a vengeance.

I found that a good nutrition plan with very little caffeine was important, but the most helpful thing for me was a long walk or some quick calisthenics to take the edge off. Deep breathing works in the moment, too. Look up 4-7-8 breathing.

Welcome to the site.

Forward12

It is common at first to have a whole mess of emotions. Alcohol also can cover up underlying mental health issues as well.
Give it some time and it should settle down. If things are still rough, you may want to start talking with a therapist to help with your anxiety issues.

Astro

Welcome to SR. In addition to what's already been mentioned I also find it helpful to attend recovery meetings and to develop a plan and program for my own recovery. I've got to talk to other like-minded addicts about what is giving me anxiety, and to hear them share similar stories so that I know it's not usual for me to feel the things I'm going through. And yes, it can be helpful to speak to a mental health professional to get their perspective too.

I hope you find these forums helpful.

AdelineRose

I have been diagnosed with anxiety disorder, bipolar, and treatment resistant depression. When I first got sober I realized just how much I was self medicating- once I had to face my life sober I realized I had to relearn how to live life.

Anxiety and depression are inevitable when getting sober, but For me it was more than just the normal depression and anxiety that comes with getting sober. I needed counseling and getting a full psychological examination to find out what symptoms and medicines would help me become mentally stable- at least make me the best me I can be.

Marie0101

I just bought a weighted blanket online to help with my anxiety and also I have leg aches (I think I may have restless leg syndrome), since stopping drinking my legs have really been hurting at night. I'm hoping the blanket will help me get better sleep and that getting better sleep will help me feel better overall. I guess I'll find out

I do think magnesium chelate is very good for relaxing. I had a doctor give me some and I've kept some in the house ever since. (Make sure it says chelate and not just magnesium).

Oceanspring

Thanks for saying something, most of all thanks for sharing your experiences and what worked for you. I took some time to think all this over, you gave me lots of food for thought!
I feel a bit lost. In 25 days or so, I'm starting a flu for the second time! I feel sick, I'm irritable etc. And here I was, thinking that I could easily stop, that I didn't have much of a problem, that withdrawals didn't apply to my situation... when in fact, I'm learning big time!
You have mentioned that it could last a while, that everything I was experiencing was in fact pretty normal. I scare myself at times, but I'm holding on...

grimm10

theres your first problem, when you think it you start to belive it, everything in your first post, sounds like alot of deep rooted things and drinking to cover them up as well as whats going on now, drinking is drinking no matter how you do it, its poison.. look up the effects on your body... sounds crazy but alters your chemistry over the years...

but im right there, im 10 months sober, single parent and alcoholic father, and guess what i did, but i was a binge drinker, didnt need to drink every day, even weeks at a time,but when i did whoooooa boy...

but its not nesscarly the booze thats the relation could just have an addictive personality, and the booze is the addiction right now or only...

but with the withdraws after all these years is going to take its tool its your body trying to repair all the damage that was done by the booze and whatever else, cigarettes especially

and being irritated is right up there with that, your going through changes mental and physically that you can explain or talk about and the added stress of the still everyday life you have to live without the comfort of that drink or smoke (not saying you smoke just throwing that in there) its hard, took me awhile to not look to booze to calm down or have a good time... but like everything it takes time, weeks, months... and booze is the first step, then you can start piecing everything back together, the withdrawals will pass remember, "time always passes" and so will that, and its one more day closer to happiness

hope that helped good luck and remeber who your doing it for, i have 2 kids and there my biggest inspiration