PanicProne

I feel like I'm losing it. I keep relapsing with methadone pills. I keep thinking of destructive things to do, and i'm losing motivation. I am so ******* nervous all the time and I just started working a few hours a at a golf course and I am starting to be around people again and i find myself stumbling on my words, second guessing every move and I am always nervous but not like this and I don't feel like myself. I'm loud and outspoken and funny... And now I feel week, tired, and shy.
I know with time this is supposed to fade and get better with more sober time...But I just am not sure how to get through this part of it.... I keep relapsing to get my courage back. And I am ******* better than that. I know I am... But my addiction talks my right back into that deep dark whole.

BlueFairy

I'm sorry you're having trouble-I just don't know much about heroin and can't give any advice...I think there is a narcotics place on these boards though.

Astro

Reaching out for any kind of support can be a good start towards recovery, I'm glad you're here. Welcome.

CobraCommander

i use to feel the same way, i would puke everyday before leaving for work. i couldnt go into malls, i would avoid hanging out with people because i was to nervous, i missed most of school as a kid because i was up till like 4am to nervous about falling asleep. i prob watched every episode of yo mtv raps and headbangers ball lol. then a injury in 2002 got me on pain meds. it was the only thing that stopped my anxiety. then last year started having chest pain in december. the pain pills kept making my chest pain and breathing worse and it took me all year to finally quit. now im nearly 30 days off and cant control my breathing and plus still have chest pain. i cant control my anxiety i cant leave i cant do anything i just get dizzy and my body shuts down. from laying in bed resting so long my abs hurt from leaning sideways to watch tv. plus my legs and body are so weak. i love to exercise but cant because of how dizzy i get. my anxiety is the worse its ever been times thousand. if i knew a time period i could deal with it but everyday i wake up i say i wanna go to this store and then i get dressed and nearly pass out and need to lay back down and say well today is down the drain i guess

at least you can get to work. i noticed when i was working and had anxiety it usually made me feel better once i got to school or work, if i avoided it then it made it worse. best thing to do is just tackle it head on everyday. u dont wanna get agoraphobia and trapped in the house like me. i just flat out tell people i have anxiety and if i cant do something i dont care what they think or how it effects there feelings anymore if they dont understand.