Blacky

I hope you are feeling better today Patricia.

Blacky

I'm still feeling weird. Minor aches and such in my stomach or chest coming and going. Teeth are feeling something, probably from me grinding or clenching them.

I also have continued to drink coffee ..
I'm sorry but I enjoy it too much ..
withdrawal - shmiffdrawal

I have not had much problem sleeping, I am waking up at 4:30am or so ..
but I can go back to sleep at around 12 even after 3 cups of coffee .. then maybe sleep till 4pm or so and get up and have more coffee ..
I have not scheduled any work and it is like 20 degrees outside ..

I think I will be doing good in a few days.

Winslow

Patricia,you ok? I wasn't trying to make my post yesterday sound all about"me" I read back and it looks that way,I was just trying to let you know I've been in your shoes((hugs)) Blacky,maybe you should try some half caff? I too drink a lot of coffee throughout the day but I'll drink a cup of regular then a cup of 1/2 caff,kinda rotate them,Kzaug,I wanted to say thanks for helping Patricia yesterday I just didn't know what to say except get rid of the booze,at this point I'm waaay more afraid of alcohol than benzos, alcohol makes me lose all self control way scary,hope we all have a super Saturday😊

patricia68

I'm struggling Winslow. I'm still drinking and panicking.

Astro

Patricia, I'm coming up on my AA anniversary. Almost 11 years ago I was doing things similar to what you're experiencing. I was panicking, my wife was throwing me out of the house, I was losing custody of my children, I couldn't focus on work so I walked away from my job, I kept freaking out and checked into a mental hospital for a few days, etc. etc. etc...........

I stopped drinking right away. I recommend you do detox safely, please go to a doctor or hospital and get help immediately. None of us can do this alone, we need support. It was a very bumpy rollercoaster ride for me but I'm still here and I thank God for the support of friends and any family that stood by my side.

You're going to be fine, but please reach out for support. And not just online support here on SR, which is great but face-to-face is even better and just might save your life. Staying clean and sober is a lot of work and it's exhausting so let other people help you and hold you up when you're too tired and frustrated to do it on your own.

Will it all be worth it? Absolutely, I wouldn't lie to you. I have a life that's fuller than I ever imagined, and it's wonderful. Every day I'm surrounded by people that love me and still hold their hands out when I feel like I'm failing and want to drink again.

Try this. Commit to not drinking and using benzos. You can do it, and in the process you'll find out who's willing to stand by your side, my guess is there will be more people than you imagined.

kzaug2014

Hi everyone,
Patricia, I wholeheartedly agree with everything Astro said & think you should look into inpatient programs in your area...or at the very least, an outpatient program.

Blacky, You're doing great! Keep it up.

Winslow, I didn't think your post sounded all about you. I thought you were very sweet.

All 3 of my kids were over today...well, my son moved back in w/us a wk & a half ago, so technically, he's always here lol. But, my oldest daughter dropped off our grandson & my other daughter dropped in unexpectedly w/bf.
And guess what? They all came baring chocolate ugh lol. I always thought Valentine's Day was for couples, but said it was for anyone they loved. Aaawww...they're such awesome kids!

(( Hugs ))

patricia68

Thank you for all your support guys

Dee74

seems like good point to get part two started:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-part-2-a.html
D