Blogs


Notices

I'm living Benzo free

Old 12-22-2015, 07:07 PM
  # 301 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
kzaug2014's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: Mi
Posts: 1,318
Intro, that was her new doc ( her old 1 left ugh. ) It was a nice thought though.

Winslow, is the new doc sticking to the taper or is he just leaving you high n dry ( uh, so to speak. )
kzaug2014 is offline  
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to kzaug2014 For This Useful Post:
Shining~Again (12-23-2015)
Old 12-23-2015, 04:24 AM
  # 302 (permalink)  
Forum Leader
 
Astro's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Scottsdale, AZ, one big happy dysfunctional family!
Posts: 19,077
Originally Posted by Winslow View Post
Hey all,don't really know what to say about the new doc,he was some young Asian who asked me why I have anxiety,how the heck am I supposed to know why I have anxiety? Maybe cuz I drank myself into a coma daily for 8 years?
Sooooo frustrating to deal with doctors who don't understand addictions. I hope you have better experiences ahead. I honestly can't say I ever found an MD who understood me, but my wellness shrink knew about AA and encouraged me to throw myself into 12 Step recovery because he saw how much it changed me.
Astro is offline  
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Astro For This Useful Post:
kzaug2014 (12-23-2015), Shining~Again (12-23-2015)
Old 12-23-2015, 06:04 AM
  # 303 (permalink)  
Member
 
Winslow's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2015
Location: Las Vegas
Posts: 1,486
Hey all,Kzaug,he just renewed the script so I'm left on my own to taper,at least I know that I will have enough to do a proper taper though, my concerns are
How to deal with the anxiety while dropping down
Dealing with the insomnia that I already have and will get worse
How I'm gonna work while tapering, eeks!(time off not an option)
What I'll do when finally off about anxiety
I never had anxiety until the stupid drinking entered the picture 10 years ago,I wouldn't be able to even understand how it felt if someone described it to me back then but now that I've had it,its hard to get rid of it cuz thinking about it brings it on,such a mess! Anyways sounds like everyone is good,hops we all have a nice Wednesday😊
Winslow is offline  
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Winslow For This Useful Post:
kzaug2014 (12-23-2015), Shining~Again (12-23-2015)
Old 12-23-2015, 08:10 AM
  # 304 (permalink)  
Member
 
Introvrtd1's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Back in the USA
Posts: 851
Originally Posted by Winslow View Post
Hey all,Kzaug,he just renewed the script so I'm left on my own to taper,at least I know that I will have enough to do a proper taper though, my concerns are
How to deal with the anxiety while dropping down
Dealing with the insomnia that I already have and will get worse
How I'm gonna work while tapering, eeks!(time off not an option)
What I'll do when finally off about anxiety
I never had anxiety until the stupid drinking entered the picture 10 years ago,I wouldn't be able to even understand how it felt if someone described it to me back then but now that I've had it,its hard to get rid of it cuz thinking about it brings it on,such a mess! Anyways sounds like everyone is good,hops we all have a nice Wednesday😊
Hi Winslow!

For me, anxiety and drinking were a vicious cycle of misery. The anxiety went away during drinking but I paid for it when the alcohol wore off, uugghh!

Hang in there! It gets better the longer sobriety time goes by!

Stay positive!

Intro
Introvrtd1 is offline  
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Introvrtd1 For This Useful Post:
kzaug2014 (12-23-2015), Shining~Again (12-23-2015)
Old 12-23-2015, 09:40 AM
  # 305 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
kzaug2014's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: Mi
Posts: 1,318
Hi Winslow, I'm glad your new doc gave you enough to taper down.
As far as dealing w/anxiety, you could try deep breathing & meditation. Different techniques can be found on UTube. I haven't tried meditation yet, but I plan on incorporating it into my schedule. I have practiced deep breathing & it works by forcing your body to calm down. I've read that meditation also helps people to sleep better.
I know it's really hard not to worry about all these things, but the more you worry, the higher your anxiety will be. My hubs had a really hard time trying to keep his mind off drugs ( & he relapsed 4 times. ) I bought him a bunch of adult coloring books & he said they helped a lot because when he was focusing on coloring, he wasn't thinking about drugs. The last time I looked, adult coloring books held over 1/2 of the top 20 spots at Amazon. People are buying them to help them relax.
When you quit, I think that you'll find that you're anxiety isn't as bad as you think it will be ( after the ativan leaves your system for good. )
But, you're thinking too far in advance. Instead, just focus on 1 day at a time. Try to change your thought process.
When I was going through withdrawals, I thought much differently. I would visualize how I would feel in a year. But, I'm beginning to realize that this way of thinking would not work for most people because most people aren't forced to quit cold from both benzos and opiates.
I don't think people realize just exactly how powerful the brain is. It's the key to a person's well being. My signature "whether you think you can or you think you can't, you're right" is simple, but absolutely true.

Astro, I don't really trust doctors because I've never had a doctor who really cares about my health. That sure sounds absurd, huh, considering the field they in lol. During the 10yrs I prescribed methadone, norco & klonopin, they all knew that the combination of meds I was on could kill me because they had me sign a yearly agreement stating that ( w/a bunch of other stipulations mixed in. )
And none of them seem to care about the extremities of the withdrawals I had to go through either. So I've transferred the responsibility of my health to me lol.
I've often thought that if doctors were required to take an addictive med for 6mo's & then be required to go cold turkey in order to graduate, then they would be much wiser when prescribing & tapering their patients. I can be quite the dreamer lol.

Patricia, how are feeling hun?

(( Hugs ))
kzaug2014 is offline  
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to kzaug2014 For This Useful Post:
Astro (12-24-2015), Shining~Again (12-23-2015)
Old 12-23-2015, 10:48 AM
  # 306 (permalink)  
Member
 
patricia68's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Canada
Posts: 1,075
Blog Entries: 1
I love my coloring book. I bought one at Michaels for 9.99 and it really helps. I color for half an hour before bedtime, sometimes during the day too. It is so relaxing!

Winslow, remember that we are still having rebound anxiety from the benzos. It's going to get better!

Last night I had some anxiety too. I couldn't sleep and I was starting to feel panicky again. I went for a long walk as soon as I woke up. It was so cold! But I feel much better now

Have a great day everybody!
patricia68 is offline  
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to patricia68 For This Useful Post:
Introvrtd1 (12-23-2015), kzaug2014 (12-23-2015), Shining~Again (12-23-2015)
Old 12-23-2015, 12:00 PM
  # 307 (permalink)  
Member
 
Introvrtd1's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Back in the USA
Posts: 851
Originally Posted by patricia68 View Post
I love my coloring book. I bought one at Michaels for 9.99 and it really helps. I color for half an hour before bedtime, sometimes during the day too. It is so relaxing!

Winslow, remember that we are still having rebound anxiety from the benzos. It's going to get better!

Last night I had some anxiety too. I couldn't sleep and I was starting to feel panicky again. I went for a long walk as soon as I woke up. It was so cold! But I feel much better now

Have a great day everybody!
Yeah, walking helps me too when Im feelin a bit anxious.....
Introvrtd1 is offline  
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to Introvrtd1 For This Useful Post:
kzaug2014 (12-23-2015), patricia68 (12-23-2015), Shining~Again (12-23-2015)
Old 12-23-2015, 04:33 PM
  # 308 (permalink)  
Guest
 
Join Date: Nov 2011
Posts: 609
Blog Entries: 2
((((((All of you))))))
I'm still kind of running on empty here. Having a hard time settling down long enough to write. 'tis the season!

Winslow - so glad you got the renewed script. I'm relieved you got that as sometimes the new doctor won't give out what previous one did.
Benzo's fall into a odd category where I would trust the support, experience, strength and hope of others. I still totally cringe when someone says "listen to your doctor. They know best." That's so not true often times with benzos. It's a rough road to navigate.

I keep seeing, though....quite a few of you doing so great. Like, I literally have been in a bit of emotional teary times reading this thread. Patricia doing so well, Winslow staying the course, Kzauge being so encouraging and having so much wisdom. Newcomers getting darn good suggestions.

Also - I did PM Isamybella,Winslow, back when she last posted and getting the "see your doctor/no medical advice" and got no reply. I think having this open dialogue is what she originally wanted. Unfortunately, I think she and another person today(different thread) have gone.

But for the ones who have found this thread, I'm so happy.

My 13 year old just said as I was carrying some gifts down to the tree "Mom. you should go to sleep". I'm sooooo totally pooped but thankful the day was not anything horrible. My anxiety over the people in stores-- like angry rushed people ...didn't happen. All peeps were nice and I had 3 men open doors for me. Sweet! I love a gentleman! LOvely clerks. Also had a very productive and positive doctors appt. I go every 3 weeks to keep on top of my back problems/meds. (no narcotics) Am not pain free and have some ongoing problems but they are workable at this point.

Sleep well...I'll hope to get my pluck back and see you tomorrow.
xoxox
Shining~Again is offline  
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to Shining~Again For This Useful Post:
Astro (12-24-2015), kzaug2014 (12-24-2015), patricia68 (12-23-2015)
Old 12-24-2015, 09:42 AM
  # 309 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
kzaug2014's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: Mi
Posts: 1,318
Shining, this is the 1st time I've ever teared up reading a post! You're such a sweetie! You've just made my day! Ty!
I know what you mean about those aches & pains. They are workable now! I never thought I'd be so happy dealing w/my pain without pain meds lol! I've had lower back problems since I was 19 & knee problems when I got older. And since I've gotten clean, it seems like I pull a new muscle every wk ( but I tend to do work that I'm not quite capable of lol. ) I even pulled my left butt muscle when I went bowling w/daughters a couple of wks ago! Hahaha!

Patricia, I bought a beautiful "fairies" adult coloring book for myself when I bought my hubs a bunch of them. I love it! It takes my mind off everything!

Winslow, have you planned out your tapering schedule hun? I didn't pm Isamybella, but I posted a message on her page awhile back. I think Shining is right. She hasn't posted anything for a month now. But, you never know, she could come back.

Intro, I hope you're mood has lifted a bit. I know you probably don't have work for the next few days, so try to keep yourself busy, k?

Sizzle, can't wait for you to get back!

Huge Happy Holiday (( Hugs )) for everyone!
kzaug2014 is offline  
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to kzaug2014 For This Useful Post:
patricia68 (12-24-2015), Shining~Again (12-28-2015)
Old 12-25-2015, 04:22 AM
  # 310 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Usa
Posts: 27
Merry Christmas

Hello all, just wanted to take a second to wish you all a very merry Christmas! Obviously the holidays can bring stress and anexity along with peace and joy. May today be filled with the latter. 🎄🎄🎄🎄
JayG123 is offline  
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to JayG123 For This Useful Post:
kzaug2014 (12-25-2015), patricia68 (12-25-2015), Shining~Again (12-28-2015)
Old 12-25-2015, 08:05 AM
  # 311 (permalink)  
Almost 700 years sober
 
Soberwolf's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 66,887
Blog Entries: 4
Merry Christmas everyone
Soberwolf is offline  
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Soberwolf For This Useful Post:
kzaug2014 (12-25-2015), patricia68 (12-25-2015), Shining~Again (12-28-2015)
Old 12-25-2015, 09:00 AM
  # 312 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
kzaug2014's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: Mi
Posts: 1,318
Merry Christmas Jay, Wolfie, Winslow, Patricia, Shining, Intro, Sizzle and everyone! Have a very blessed day!
kzaug2014 is offline  
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to kzaug2014 For This Useful Post:
Astro (12-26-2015), patricia68 (12-25-2015), Shining~Again (12-28-2015)
Old 12-25-2015, 12:06 PM
  # 313 (permalink)  
Member
 
Winslow's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2015
Location: Las Vegas
Posts: 1,486
Merry Christmas to all my friends, hope you're all enjoying your day😊
Winslow is offline  
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to Winslow For This Useful Post:
kzaug2014 (12-25-2015), patricia68 (12-25-2015), Shining~Again (12-28-2015)
Old 12-25-2015, 04:19 PM
  # 314 (permalink)  
Member
 
Introvrtd1's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Back in the USA
Posts: 851
Originally Posted by kzaug2014 View Post
Merry Christmas Jay, Wolfie, Winslow, Patricia, Shining, Intro, Sizzle and everyone! Have a very blessed day!
Merry Christmas!!
Introvrtd1 is offline  
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to Introvrtd1 For This Useful Post:
kzaug2014 (12-25-2015), patricia68 (12-25-2015), Shining~Again (12-28-2015)
Old 12-27-2015, 08:44 AM
  # 315 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
kzaug2014's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: Mi
Posts: 1,318
Hey guys,
How was everyone's Christmas?

We brought our 2 grandsons home w/us and holy cow! They run me ragged...energetic lil buggers! Lol! They're really great kids!
I'm hoping to watch my Lions play today. We'll see how that goes haha!

(( Hugs ))
kzaug2014 is offline  
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to kzaug2014 For This Useful Post:
Astro (12-28-2015), Shining~Again (12-28-2015)
Old 12-27-2015, 02:20 PM
  # 316 (permalink)  
Member
 
Introvrtd1's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Back in the USA
Posts: 851
Originally Posted by kzaug2014 View Post
Hey guys,
How was everyone's Christmas?

We brought our 2 grandsons home w/us and holy cow! They run me ragged...energetic lil buggers! Lol! They're really great kids!
I'm hoping to watch my Lions play today. We'll see how that goes haha!

(( Hugs ))
Heh heh! Christmas is for the kiddies!

Its great to look back on our own childhood memories, but Im glad the holidays are wrapping up......its kinda depressing at times...

Heres to hoping things are fine with you!
Intro
Introvrtd1 is offline  
The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to Introvrtd1 For This Useful Post:
Dee74 (12-29-2015), kzaug2014 (12-27-2015), patricia68 (12-28-2015), Shining~Again (12-28-2015)
Old 12-28-2015, 04:21 AM
  # 317 (permalink)  
Forum Leader
 
Astro's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Scottsdale, AZ, one big happy dysfunctional family!
Posts: 19,077
After having the grandchildren over on Christmas Eve, then the adult children on Christmas Day, my wife and I got away for Sat. night and went camping. It was nice to decompress!

Hope y'all had a great Christmas.
Astro is offline  
The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to Astro For This Useful Post:
Dee74 (12-29-2015), kzaug2014 (12-28-2015), patricia68 (12-28-2015), Shining~Again (12-28-2015)
Old 12-28-2015, 07:24 AM
  # 318 (permalink)  
Member
 
patricia68's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Canada
Posts: 1,075
Blog Entries: 1
Good morning!

I'm still feeling very tired, every single muscle hurts! I was thinking of taking ibuprofen last night, but I changed my mind. I need to let my brain heal without any more chemicals. I'll ride it out.

I can't wait for this week to be over. I feel sad most of the time, the holidays blues I guess. I think I need some more meditation time, maybe a bath tonight. We'll see

Have a great day everybody!
patricia68 is offline  
The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to patricia68 For This Useful Post:
Astro (12-29-2015), Dee74 (12-29-2015), kzaug2014 (12-28-2015), Shining~Again (12-29-2015)
Old 12-28-2015, 07:26 AM
  # 319 (permalink)  
Guest
 
Join Date: Nov 2011
Posts: 609
Blog Entries: 2
Belated Xmas cheers and tears!

I had a terrific holiday yet am also glad that the New Year is right around
the bend.
Some of the highlights were:
- I was gifted the most atrocious mustard yellow shirt. Think Star Trek yellow but worse....as it was 1/2 polyester!
I'm notoriously hard to buy clothing for....but no way anyone on this earth could of liked that shirt. :-x
- Bought my daughter a violin - just a cheap starter one. It's beautiful looking. She was over the top happy. Made my night!

I found holiday was much less stressful since I bought near everything for the child right after Thanksgiving. Grocery shopping caused me the most fear out of everything.

My anxiety/agoraphobia/being paralyzed in decisions, was much better this year than any previous year. I've been noticing how a lot of my problems are universal. The more I get out, like church for instance and talk to others that what I consider hard to handle (hoards of people out shopping) is not something most seem to enjoy or look forward to.

kzaug - you sweet thang you! xoxox I've got to zip off a PM to you once I feed the kid and straighten up.

Patricia? Winslow? Check in and tell us how you're doing!
Shining~Again is offline  
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to Shining~Again For This Useful Post:
Astro (12-29-2015), Dee74 (12-29-2015), kzaug2014 (12-28-2015)
Old 12-28-2015, 10:48 AM
  # 320 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
kzaug2014's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: Mi
Posts: 1,318
Hi guys!
I can't believe it's already the last wk of 2015! I remember thinking that 2014 was the worst yr of my life & how long the time seemed to be dragging on ugh lol. Wow! How time flies! So, for those of you that it seems like time is dragging, life gets much better.

Astro, camping sounds like a great way to relax! I love camping! Michiganders don't camp much around here during Christmas though, lol!

We're in the middle of a winter storm warning, w/freezing rain, high winds & power outages predicted ugh. We're still recovering from the winds from last wk ( over 70mph wind gusts. We live in a highly wooded area & had a huge branch fall on our house last wk. Scared the crap outta all of us lol. I can't imagine what it sounds like when an entire tree falls on your house, like many people had yikes!

Patricia, I don't think there's anything wrong w/taking ibuprofen. It's an anti inflammatory & could help w/your aches & pains. I love the way you take the proper steps to help yourself! Holidays can be a particularly hard time for many people, but you're doing so well! I'm proud of you!

Shining, I'm glad you had a great Christmas! So you got a new shirt that puts new meaning to "ugly Christmas sweater?" Lol! I love Christmas, but am always relieved too when it passes. The hustle & the bustle wears me down lol. 1 of my favorite parts of Christmas is at night, w/all the lights out, looking at the beautiful Christmas tree.

Winslow, how are you doing hun? Plz check it when you get a chance.

A big hidy ho to everyone else! (( Hugs ))
kzaug2014 is offline  
The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to kzaug2014 For This Useful Post:
Astro (12-29-2015), Dee74 (12-29-2015), patricia68 (12-28-2015), Shining~Again (12-29-2015)

Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off




All times are GMT -7. The time now is 10:00 PM.