Happy and cranky all at once - the mood swings
 

:Val004:
Well Day 15. I never thought I'd be counting the days but I'm writing them down in my daytimer for reminder.

Thanks for your support.

I've been completely moody this week, however still feel better then I did drinking. Also I am enjoying waking up in the morning with no hangover.

I hope the moodiness passes.

The rollercoaster of emotions will begin to settle soon. Just remain focused on your recovery. Good luck.

It takes a while for your brain chemicals to level out. A doctor told me that alcohol provided a temporary supply of the "happy chemical" and now that the substitute is not there, my body has to take the time to learn to make it on its own. It takes time and patience to let my body do what it has to do to make up for the false happiness I've been supplying all these years.

In my experience (1 month sober, 6 months reducing) the moods begin to level off. I still get sad but not nearly AS sad. I still get mad but not nearly AS mad. And the sad and mad feelings dissipate much more quickly.

keep trudging along!

Are you aware of PAWS?

http://www.tlctx.com/ar_pages/paw_part1.htm

Well done on your sober time...:banana:

The moodiness does pass. Sometimes, depending on you, anti depressants are required (I needed them, but again that is a result of more than just alcohol use... have a family history of it and a lot of other factors that led to severe depression).

Waking sober is such a relief. Wonderful time to just slowly ease into your day and to find a balance with your day!

Good work and keep going.

Peace, Levi

Erin - I'll agree that the moodiness does pass. Part of what made me realize I was working on a real problem was when I felt like I was happier/more outgoing/more fun after a drink. First few days without I was a wreck, but recognized it for what it was and just willed my self to shut the heck up, move on when things bothered me. After a couple weeks it got much better, after a month it's virtually gone for me. Could have something to do with getting real sleep.....

Hang in there - sounds like you're doing great and at least self-aware of how you're feeling. Whether it's 16 days or 60, it will get easier.

Congrats on your sober days, may you enjoy many more of them, one at a time. I find now that I accept the feelings that life hands out to me and realise that they come in stages and that I grow through them all. The moodiness settles in time.

Peace and love,
Brigid :)

That's great Erin! Keep up the great work! The moodiness will get better for sure......I remember it and hated it, but it's better than doing stupid stuff and having post drunken depression!

Thank you...

I've made it through two out of three trigger nights. Yesterday I came from home from work with two invitations to go out. One was to meet a group of people at a pub. Another was a restaurant and then going to a lounge for a birthday (for someone I didn't know). I didn't go because I think it's too soon to put myself into situations like that.

However I came up home feeling depressed because it's Friday night and that's what people do (at least most of my friends do) go out.

Anyway I got a call around 8 from the friend that invited me to a pub and with her basically telling too (as I just ready to feel lousy at home) I went to her place and we went for a walk.

I'm on anti-depressants. Started taking them a week ago. I imagine they will kick in soon.

I know it's not the end of the world not drinking. I think it's just going to take some time with all this stuff. I think I drank because of fear of being alone and now I really am alone. The boyfriend is gone (which has been really hard - I've spoken to him everyday for over three years) and a few friends have dropped off. So just a lot of adjustments all at once.

Onward - I am bouldering (rock climbing) today which should kill because I'm not in the same shape as I used too.

Thanks for everyone's words of encouragement.

BTW - both friends know that I quit drinking and were very understanding.
:Squat:

That is really smart thinking!! Hope you enjoyed your walk. I found a dance class on a Friday evening and did that with my daughters - stopped me from feeling like there was no "fun" or "reward" at the end of the week, like you say ... I felt that was what everyone else did ... over time I have found that it is not necessarily the norm to go drinking on a Friday night.

:) :)