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still here, still struggling

Old 04-30-2006, 08:38 AM
  # 41 (permalink)  
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Kindness,

Do you have a child now?

What finally did it for me is that I woke up one morning and saw my life ahead, and realized that as my son got older, I was setting him up for a life of misery with a drunken dad. I was not abusive or dangerous, but if he were old enough to be aware, he would be embarassed by me. I wanted to be the best role model I could be for him.

That's when I got really serious about quitting for good. And it was still very hard. The compulsion to drink was so strong that it seemed to literally take over.

I went to AA (over the period of several years). Not for me.

I tried the hypoglycemic diet.

I tried hypnosis.

I read everything I could get my hands on.

Every day I would "swear off." And every night, I would "give in."

Every morning, I felt like a schmuck.

When a person gets into a cycle like that, moderation is a pipe dream. It is time to give it up completely. But how?

What worked for me was a simple book. "Rational Recovery, the New Cure for Substance Addiction." It teaches a powerful mental tool that can literally defeat your addiction in a matter of minutes. You are done. Recovered.

I don't mean to make this sound trite, or simple. My path was long and winding before I read this book. But once I did, it was like a light bulb went off in my head, and I was...


done.

--Scott
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Old 04-30-2006, 08:44 AM
  # 42 (permalink)  
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It's a book? I thought it was a course or something through the internet. I'll try to find it.
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Old 04-30-2006, 10:00 AM
  # 43 (permalink)  
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Hallo WL,

There is a crash course offered for free on the rational recovery website. There is a book that is $14.95 available there, or on amazon.com.

I believe there is also an in-person workshop that you can take with Jack Trimpey (the author). Although, from my experience with RR, the great majority do just fine with the first two.

--Scott
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Old 04-30-2006, 10:15 AM
  # 44 (permalink)  
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Tantic,

Yes, I have a son now and he will be three in June. I know exactly how you feel because my son is one of my driving motivations to be sober. I do not want my son to see me as a drunk. I am his role model as for women and I refuse to let him grow up thinking all women are crazy (no comments from the peanut gallery!!) I will check out that book and see if it works for me. Right now, AA has given me hope and I believe that is a great start.
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Old 04-30-2006, 10:59 AM
  # 45 (permalink)  
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it might help to chanfge your screen name


best
fraankie
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Old 04-30-2006, 02:47 PM
  # 46 (permalink)  
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I didn't drink tonight. My grandpa is probably going to die in the next day or two so I don't even have the faintest thought of drinking right now.
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Old 04-30-2006, 07:16 PM
  # 47 (permalink)  
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Winelover

I am sorry to hear that you are losing your grandpa. I'm also happy thet you are giving him the gift of knowing you will be strong and clear eyed in your own life so that he can go in peace.

Nice choice!
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Old 05-01-2006, 03:17 AM
  # 48 (permalink)  
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it might help to chanfge your screen name
I've thought about that. It was perfectly appropriate at the time I joined and I certainly wasn't in the mood for thinking of clever and cutsie recovery oriented names. Now I'm not sure if it's a good idea to change since some people actually know me now. Any thoughts?

So Kindness, how are things with you. You may want to start a thread so that people can find you easier and comment directly to you on your issues. Theres a tab at the top left of the screen. If you've already done that I apologize for not looking yet. I hope you're well. It does sound like we have similar problems.
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Old 05-01-2006, 07:44 AM
  # 49 (permalink)  
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I think you can be a winelover and still not drink it. I still like beer but I don't drink it.

I'm sorry to hear about your grandfather, you will be in my thoughts.

~doll
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Old 05-01-2006, 07:54 AM
  # 50 (permalink)  
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Thanks Miss C and Paperdolls. My Grandpa passed away this morning. We're flying back to the states tomorrow so all is chaos here now. I'm so sad.
I know the alcohol will be flowing steadily this week since that's the norm at my family's gatherings. No one gets sloppy drunk but everyone drinks a lot. I'm so scared.
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Old 05-01-2006, 07:55 AM
  # 51 (permalink)  
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Be strong sweetie......you CAN do it!
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Old 05-01-2006, 08:26 AM
  # 52 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by fraankie
it might help to chanfge your screen name


best
fraankie

I noticed that,too........perhaps "former-WL"??
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Old 05-01-2006, 08:52 AM
  # 53 (permalink)  
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Hi Winelover,

I'm so sorry for your loss, Try and hang in there, Do the best you can, it is a time to focus on your loved ones, not your own issues.

btw, I like your name, and see no reason to change it.

S
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