Pingo

Hi..Iam new here....it seems all i want to do anymore is get off work and drink(beer) My ex-wife said i was an alcoholic....but I denied everything because I always go to work, don't fight and pay all my bills....like this christmas weekend I'am already planning to get blasted...then start work again...I have about one friend besides my ex-wife unless i want to go get ripped playing pool with the other drinkers...guess she was right!!! any ideas anyone?
Peace Pingo

NoMoBeer

My advice:
1. Go to AA, don't drink between meetings.
2. Find a sponsor.
3. Get to work on the steps.

I was a functional alcoholic as well. Towards the end of my drinking it was tough to hold it all together, and I had a lot of Mondays off for some reason...

Life gets better when we are not drinking, it won't get better if we continue.

Ken

sugarssweetpea

I agree.

Pingo

I've had a few of those Mondays....and Tuesdays too...I think alot of it now is I have nothing to do...even when married though I still drank and had things to do...reluctantly! I thought about going to school just to keep busy and meet people...Pingo

Linda C.

We were all functional at one time... This is a progressive disease.. We cease to be functional eventually -- then we cease to give a **** --- then we have 3 choices if were alcoholic.. Get locked up, get covered up or get sobered up..

Suggestions?? NoMo beer laid it right out there.. That is how I did it and its worked wonderfully for 25 years now..

Linda C.
"Nothing changes if nothing changes"

CarolD

Hi and Welcome to SR!

Yes...I too functioned very well for many years .

Then my mind became saturated with alcohol.
Depression dogged me daily.

I did not like the woman I had become.

AA is my solution for living a better life.
It can be for you too.

Great to see you seeking answers...Blessings

Pingo

Iam almost to the point of not giving a @$%#@.....but I still do give a $%@^ about things....I see some people and realize how worse off I could be and shouldn't feel sorry for myself and just quit and snap out of it....everyone tells me if you want to to stop you can..its in the mind Pingo

CarolD

When and if you really want to quit...

find the T.I.E. AA Club in Vegas.
They have lot's of meetings and many
very strong members willing to guide you.

Get into action and you can win over alcohol.

Peter

You seem to still have some doubts as to whether you are an alcoholic or not. However the fact that you are here is proof that you have some concerns.

You are the only one who can really determine how serious your drinking is and if you might require the assistance of a support group like AA.

I went to AA because drinking was making my life "unmanagable."

It was unmanagable in two ways. Physically as well as emotionally.

Physically in the sense that I was having trouble at work and in my relationships.I was physically ill and met in frequent car accidents. Bills went unpaid.

Emotionally in the sense that I lived with a lot of fear and anger and a deep feeling of hopelessness.

It was not the physical pain that forced me so much to seek help, but rather the emotional pain of knowing I was losing everything in my life that I held precious. My business, my friends and family, my woman,my self respect.

I did not become an alcoholic in one day. There was a time when I too was able to meet my obligations. but alcohol, ever the cunning and stealthy adversary had taken control of my body and mind before I even knew what was happening.

Not everybody that drinks is an alcoholic and some people have even been known to cut down on their own when they realized things werre getting serious. However if you think you have a problem and need some help AA will help you. In the meantime you are welcome to hang out here with us.

Pingo

I seem to seem to relate to the emotional issues...although the sometime morning headaches suck !! I eat Aleve...

p25735

Wow, well put. I think "functional alcoholic" is a misnomer if not an oxymoron. Yeah, I functioned in the sense that I kept my job etc., but I wasn't really functioning in the sense of living a full life. It was 2+ years of daily Hell in which all personal goals were pushed aside, in which I rarely had sex with my SO, that adversely affected my health and probably aged me 5 years.

Pingo, you mentioned you have nothing to do. Is that really true? I found that alcohol not only caused me to procrastinate, it gave me permission to do so by easing the pain of putting those things off.

Please, please don't learn your lesson the hard way and stop now. Take care.

draven85

I have also had a hard time with ajusting now that I am getting sober. My old friends all drink and to be with them drinking drives me crazy. I would recommend going to an AA meeting if you would like to meet friends, and sober friends at that. I just went to a meeting today and a girl recognized me from high school. We are going to a meeting tomorrow night and it could be the start to a new friendship.

Peter

Yes, I am inclined to agree with you.

Don S

Welcome, pingo and p25735, to SR, and thanks for posting.
If you want to check out some links about various programs that might help you quit drinking, here's a link (it's at the top of the page):
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...nfo-76726.html

There are some 12 step links there as well.

...everyone tells me if you want to to stop you can..its in the mind Pingo

You can. But we're all happy to talk about what we did, too.
Take care,

trytrytry

Pingo,
I haven't joined AA yet and by no means a trained professional. It's been almost three weeks for me without a drink. So I'm a newcomer too. I can relate to your post in that I didn't think I was an alocoholic cause I seemed responsible as well. My bills are always paid, I've never missed work cause of booze (have gone to work severely hung over), and people consider me dependable. I never had a drink before or during work but plenty after. I guess I created a "box" in which I could abuse alcohol while fooling myself that it was ok or normal. In these first three weeks I've found mornings without hangovers more enjoyable, increased energy and clear thought everyday, a slimmer waistline, extra money in my pocket, and more time on the weekends to spend productively. What I'm trying to say is maybe your not an extreme case or a severe alcoholic but you may want to examine what you think is normal. I thought my behavior of binge drinking on the weekends and hitting up a couple happy hours along the week was normal until I stepped away from it. It's a decision only you can make. How you do it is up to you as well. All can say is quitting was one of the best decisions I've made.

Music

Oh hell!! Wives?? What the hell do they know anyway? Just keep going the way you are and make up your own mind. You know yourself better than she does ......don't you?

michaelj

If being a functioning alcoholic means being able to lead a "normal" life in respect of job, bills etc then that definition is OK by me. In my case I functioned pretty well for many years but the alcoholic side of me got deeper and deeper into the misery of addiction. This may be simplistic but I think many alcoholics use the term to distinguish between themselves as useful members of society and those unfortunate individuals who are effectively down and out, homeless and at the bottom of the social ladder.
What you don't mention Pingo, is any mention of a desire to stop drinking. The road to sobriety starts with your own desire to quit. There is endless guidance here, at AA and on other web sites but only you can take that first step.
Good luck
Michael

chip

Pingo-
You don't have to be bound by this obssession and compulsion. AA will help you if you have an open mind towards it. Life is so much better without drinking. Have you talked to your doctor about your drinking? It sounds like you are getting ready to really face this demon. You will be amazed how good it feels to be free of the grip of alcoholism. If you can get it out of your system, and stay away from that first drink...day by day...you will be so much better off. AA could give you the tools to do that.

I hope you can find real peace, Pingo.
chip

jpeace2

Pingo, welcome to SR. I too was a binge drinker, only mainly drank when I was under stress, was pissed off at something, had a bad day at work, oh, and of course at Friday Happy Hours and softball games, driving home drunken dialing people FROM THE CAR, because I was bored, because I was lonely.......you get the picture. I've been sober a little over four months now, probably the longest period between binges I've had in years, and hopefully this time it's for good. I too had to come here and ask if these things meant I was an alcoholic and needed to be here, and I came to the conclusion after reading some chapters in the Big Book that I am and I do. I don't want to get like the people who are hiding bottles in their underwear drawers and laundry baskets, I hated waking up with a hangover and I too remember many a Monday morning where I had been "stricken with food poisoning" or some other mysterious stomach ailment that didn't require me to SOUND sick as I was calling out of work. I remember clearly blacking out once driving home from DE to PA and having no idea how I ended up in my driveway, safe and unharmed. Thank God no one else was either (I don't think). I remember clearly puking my guts out on my parents' front lawn on Christmas Eve and being too drunk to open presents with my family. I remember countless number of other stupid incidents that should have never happened, fights with my ex and other friends at a bar, and many other pieces of evidence that have convinced me that I cannot control my drinking when I do drink and therefore, there is no reason for me to continue drinking. My liver is not in good shape so it didn't take as much for me to get drunk as when I was younger, which is also a bad sign.

Long and short of it, I'm sober and a lot happier today, and when I first came here I didn't really think I had that much of a problem. Amazing how much different you feel when you start to look back and remember....cringe......

Pingo

jpeace...sounds like me except for the fighting....I just get $@!*^$ up....