been to doctor today,going to AA tonight
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Ireland
Posts: 5
been to doctor today,going to AA tonight
as i mentioned on my first post i have finally Admitted i have a problem. i went to my doctor today and she was wonderful and understanding and her kind words brought me to tears. im going to my first meeting tonight and im petrified,theres still this small part of me that believes im not an alcoholic and im wrong about the whole thing but deep down i know i am one.i have been given xanax by my doc for the anxienty and im going to take one soon before i go to the meeting because as ive said im petrified!il let you all know how it goes tonight when i get back..one question, when i go to the meeting and they ask if theres any newcomers and they ask you to introduce yourself,do you say ur name and that u are an alcoholic or do i jsut say my name??
Member
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Northeast, USA
Posts: 39
I am an AA newbie and all I have done is just say, "Hi, I am _______ and if it is okay I would just like to listen." Everyone has been cool with that so far. I could add I am alcoholic to that intro since there is no doubt for me but I think that is the sentence I have memorized. I have not been pushed at the meetings, I just act like a sponge, take it all in, and if I have questions I actually come here and get plenty of good answers. IMHO you should just find what is comfortable for you right now.
Best of Luck and good to see you back here after your initial posts.
Best of Luck and good to see you back here after your initial posts.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: QUEENS, NY
Posts: 200
Hi Stevo,
I felt the same way when I went to my first meeting, and its hard to say the words " I am an alcoholic", I agree with Gideon its perfectly fine to say you need to listen. Its really good to introduce yourself, it will make you feel part of the meeting and people will introduce themselves to you, which helps to make connections.
I also wasn't sure if I was an alcoholic, but listening to people share, I could indentify with the feelings, not always the stories, but the feelings are the same.
I think its amazing that you are taking this step towards yourself, it takes a lot of courage! And as they say "relax, you are in a safe place" you really are!
Keep us posted, and best of luck, Roisin
I felt the same way when I went to my first meeting, and its hard to say the words " I am an alcoholic", I agree with Gideon its perfectly fine to say you need to listen. Its really good to introduce yourself, it will make you feel part of the meeting and people will introduce themselves to you, which helps to make connections.
I also wasn't sure if I was an alcoholic, but listening to people share, I could indentify with the feelings, not always the stories, but the feelings are the same.
I think its amazing that you are taking this step towards yourself, it takes a lot of courage! And as they say "relax, you are in a safe place" you really are!
Keep us posted, and best of luck, Roisin
Super! There is no set way for introductions in AA.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Santa Barbara, CA
Posts: 31
Most sponsors would recommend that you not share very much for the first thirty days. I understand, we all understand, that you probably have a lot of emotions bundled up that need releasing. That usually happens in the first week or two because you are not pouring huge amounts of tranquilizer into your system and you can actually FEEL things again. None of the groups I hang with has any problem with newcomers sharing, or not sharing, but we all want what's best for you. That tends to be what the Program has proven to be good -- getting a sponsor, working your first three steps, and staying away from all foreign subtances (including Xanax).
Good Luck!
Good Luck!
Member
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Santa Barbara, CA
Posts: 31
Oh, I almost forgot...about whether you really have a problem...yes, you are an alcoholic! Surprise! I am sure that most of your family and friends already classify you as "heavy social drinker", and sorry to say but that is their un-educated way of viewing actual alcoholism. It sounded really strange to my ears at first, kind of freakish, but once you've been in the Program for a while you'll know you're in the right place, amongst people who actually understand you.
Cheers! Enjoy your meetings!
Cheers! Enjoy your meetings!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Highlands, TX
Posts: 1,192
Nobody else can diagnose you as an alcoholic except yourself. Yeah, we probably know before you realize it for yourself since we've been there. I am proud of you for going to a meeting. It took a lot of courage for me to go too but mainly for me I went because I had finally realized that no matter how many times and ways I had tried to control alcohol it was controlling me and killing me. AA became the lesser of the two evils (AA or death???? AA anyday!!). Walking into that meeting was the best thing I ever did. I have 16 months sober today and it would not have been possible had I not made that first step.
I would definitely introduce myself as a newcomer. It is totally up to you whether you identify yourself as an alcoholic or not. There are no set rules on this. The main thing is that you 1) go, 2) look for the similarities and not the differences (in other words listen to the experiences and feelings that people share and don't pay attention to the outward appearances), 3) remain openminded. I was greeted warmly and even though I don't remember much of my first meeting I do remember feeling accepted. I've had members share bits and pieces of what they remember from my first time and that's pretty cool. I had been given Xanax because I was having the shakes so bad but quickly got off of them after listening and learning that I have to avoid all drugs, not just alcohol.
Good luck tonight. I hope you have a wonderful experience just being in the presence of those who've been where you are, or are where you're at, and understand without judging you.
Hugs,
Kellye
I would definitely introduce myself as a newcomer. It is totally up to you whether you identify yourself as an alcoholic or not. There are no set rules on this. The main thing is that you 1) go, 2) look for the similarities and not the differences (in other words listen to the experiences and feelings that people share and don't pay attention to the outward appearances), 3) remain openminded. I was greeted warmly and even though I don't remember much of my first meeting I do remember feeling accepted. I've had members share bits and pieces of what they remember from my first time and that's pretty cool. I had been given Xanax because I was having the shakes so bad but quickly got off of them after listening and learning that I have to avoid all drugs, not just alcohol.
Good luck tonight. I hope you have a wonderful experience just being in the presence of those who've been where you are, or are where you're at, and understand without judging you.
Hugs,
Kellye
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Ireland
Posts: 5
thank you everyone for all your kind words of support and advice,im not long back from my first meeting..it took me a bit of courage to go into the first meeting,i stood outside having a cig and thought maybe i should just go next week but i didnt i went in ten minutes early and meet the seceratary i think it was and shook hands and introduced each other but i forgot his name instantly. then a man who has been going for a while came in and introduced himself,we spoke for a minute but i was petrified and forgot his name instantly aswell,infact i dont think i can remember anyones name from the meeting!during the meeting itself i was petrified and really stated to crave a drink, maybe it was the fear and being in a unfamiliar place and sometimes that is when i would turn to the bottle so that may have had alot to do with it.i listened and didnt speak however and could relate to what some people said,as ive said im only 24 and alot of what the older members said i could relate to in the earlier years of their stories, and made me think of where i would end up had i not sought help now.at the end of the meeting the man i spoke with at the start brought me to get my starter pack and introduced me to the chairperson and seretary and the chairperson gave me his card and told me to ring him anytime i needed to talk no mater what time it was..the man i spoke with told me of another meeting tomorrow and asked if i wanted to go and offered me a lift and gave me his number.
i learned a few things tonight.
1) the importance of regular attendance of meetings to the other members, how they need to attend and the conseqeunces if the dont.
2)i had no reason ti be afraid,as everyone here told me everyone there is there for the same reason as me and that everyone there is there to help.
3)i thought about the future and for the 1st time i didnt think about it with fear cos i cant drink but i thought abiut how i would love to be able to get out of this initial state of withdrawel and be as far along as some of the other members there.
i can hope i continue to attend regularly as i feel they will be of a help to me a great help,i know there is dark days ahead for me but one thing is for sure i feel so much better tonight after going to the meeting than i did before i went, maybe its a feeling of me starting to accept my problem im not sure but i definitly feel better.
i learned a few things tonight.
1) the importance of regular attendance of meetings to the other members, how they need to attend and the conseqeunces if the dont.
2)i had no reason ti be afraid,as everyone here told me everyone there is there for the same reason as me and that everyone there is there to help.
3)i thought about the future and for the 1st time i didnt think about it with fear cos i cant drink but i thought abiut how i would love to be able to get out of this initial state of withdrawel and be as far along as some of the other members there.
i can hope i continue to attend regularly as i feel they will be of a help to me a great help,i know there is dark days ahead for me but one thing is for sure i feel so much better tonight after going to the meeting than i did before i went, maybe its a feeling of me starting to accept my problem im not sure but i definitly feel better.
and the best is yet to come! I am so proud of you!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: Arizona
Posts: 872
Very proud of you -- yes, we are all in AA to help each other. When you feel comfortable sharing, you will... and you will touch another's heart and help another suffering alcoholic.
For now, go to meetings.... don't drink between meetings. It's that simple...
Outstanding job.
Please feel free to send me a PM if you have questions or need to talk...
Ken
For now, go to meetings.... don't drink between meetings. It's that simple...
Outstanding job.
Please feel free to send me a PM if you have questions or need to talk...
Ken
Member
Join Date: May 2003
Location: Northern CA
Posts: 1,432
Originally Posted by ismchanger
... That tends to be what the Program has proven to be good -- getting a sponsor, working your first three steps, and staying away from all foreign subtances (including Xanax).
Good Luck!
Good Luck!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Lakeside OH.
Posts: 62
Glad to see you went to a meeting.Remember drinking is just the symtom.AA is about changing your whole way of live.You will never experience anything like it.
Gratefull recovering alcoholic and drug addict
Bob
Gratefull recovering alcoholic and drug addict
Bob
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