JennyK

to stop my husband from driving while drinking?

He KNOWS he is an alcoholic. He KNOWS he will lose his job if he gets another DUI. He KNOWS will lose him family if he screws up big one more time.

He knows this. Yet he still does it.

He does not go to AA. I do not go to Alanon, however, I am well versed in what I can and can not control. I KNOW he will continue to drink until he decides not to.

It is the driving issue that I am taking action on. If he drinks and drives and loses his job, then I will leave him. He knows this. I am terrified of the financial and emotional ramifications of this. He also knows this.

I love my husband very very much. However, after the past 2 years of financial abuse and emotional chaos, I know that if this "status quo" does not continue, I am not doing it all over again.

I have told him this and when he is sober he totally agrees with me. Yet, he continues to drink and drive.

Is there anything at all that I can do to help assure he will not continue to do this? I know I can't control the drinking, I accept that. However, the driving...what...what would it take for him to stop? Anything at all I can do, I truly love this man and the thought of our family being ruined by his stupid and addictive actions breaks me into a million pieces.

Thank you,

Jenny

Chy

If he knows he has a problem and agrees he doesn't want to be drinking and driving there is a breatalizer device you can purchase for you car. If he blows to high of an alcohol content level the car doesn't start. That's extreme I know, the other choice is driving him and picking him up yourself but that's a wee bit codie IMO. He's got to own up to the consequences of his actions and be prepared to pay the piper if caught.

Unfortunatly sweety he's not going to change until ready.

Taiman

If your husband is drinking and driving he could kill himself or worse someone else. I think if that happpened you would be racked with guilt. You can't and shouldn't try to control your husband's drinking, however you don't have to help/encourage his drinking and driving either and if you are silent on his drinking & driving, that is what you are doing.

I would let him know that you aren't going to have the death of someone from his drunk driving on your conscience and if he does it again, the moment he leaves you are going to call the police to report him. He is chooses to drink and drive after that, call the police on him.

MamaGoose

Calling the police doesn't work. They won't do anything. I tried it on my brother. He has two DUIs and still drinks. I called MADD and the police when he got his license back the second time. Seems he had to be 120 days sober at the beginning of his losing his license which he did but they NEVER tested him again before he went to get his license again and he was back up to a 30 pack a day and still drinking that much and driving. Neither he nor my SIL will go to meetings.
I gave it to God.
MamaGoose