jmhs002

A co worker of mine often brings up the fact that I don't drink any more. I have not told him that I am in AA and an alcoholic. I just told him that I feel better when I don't drink - well, he often brings up the topic of drinking and jokes about people being an alcoholic and going to AA - like it is supposed to be funny.

So, here is my issue - I don't think it is funny. It took a lot to finally admit my alcoholism and to start to do something about it. I don't know that I want my entire office to know my story, on the other hand, these AA and alcoholic type "jokes" are getting really old really quickly.

Your thoughts?

Irish Virus

Personally, I don't have a problem with alcohol jokes. Especially around St. Pat's Day they are funny. It's when people are saying $hit maliciously that it gets out of line.
If the jokes are directed towards you, then the man is sick. They say pray for him just as you would any other sick person.

Pick-a-name

Heard any good cancer jokes lately? Sorry for your co-worker's ignorance.
(Said as the wife of an active alcoholic who is having cancer surgery next week....people are afraid and ignorant about lots of things. Maybe just lucky to not have had to encounter dealing with either yet in their lives.)

Glad you are sober!

splendra

Maybe he is afraid he is an alcoholic...that's what it sounds like to me...

chip

jmhs-
I used to make similar jokes...when I was in denial. I never did so to bother anybody. One of my favorite lines was "I'm no alchoholic, alchoholics go to meetings.." ha ha, really funny. Deep down inside, I was wondering. Another classic "chip" joke went down like this. I'd say "this is my second favorite beer of the night", and take a sip. Someone would always say "gee, chip, what's your favorite beer of the night?". I'd then chug back the rest of my beer and say "the next one!!". That is pretty much a confession to alchoholism.......with humour used as a vehicle.

If your co-worker is doing this to get under your skin, I have to echo Irish's suggestion. Pray for him/her. Perhaps they are suffering, and don't know how to reach out. Perhaps something is wrong with them, and they need help.

My guess is that he/she feels insecure about his/her drinking.
chip

CarolD

When I find anyones jokes offensive...I walk away.
And I do it as they are speaking.

Autumn

Hi Jmhs. No, it's not funny. In fact, I might be pretty irate if it were me. My co-workers only know that I don't drink, and that's it. End of discussion. I would leave it there if I were you too.

Sooner or later though, if he doesn't stop, you might become so angry and hurt that you might lash out. Then everyone will know for sure, if big mouth hasn't made that possible already.

Good thing you're discussing it now before it gets to that point. I would take him aside discreetly, and tactfully tell him exactly how you feel about it, much the way you posted it here, without telling him the rest. If that doesn't stop the motormouth, take it to the boss.

Or you might want to try shrugging it off. No doubt he will eventually move on to some other topic taboo to the workplace, and find himself fired. In fact, this is what I would most likely do in this situation. He doesn't seem like the type who can be trusted with a "discreet conversation".

Anyway, we're all proud of you here.

historyteach

Perhaps you could say something to the effect that you are proud of people who recognize and have the courage to overcome their personal difficulties. Then, walk away.
No admission on your part -- just an admiration of those who turn their lives around for the better.
S/he can't really argue with that.
Shalom!

Dan

Yep. I can control where my footsteps take me.
I can control who I wish to listen to.
I can't control someone's penchant for being a moron.

hotwingeatter

That is odd, people where I work are increadably supportive. Maybe your best choice is to talk to him. When making fun of people in a work enviroment race, religion, sexual preference can cause you a lot of problems with HR. Just say something like, "you shouldn't talk about that stuff cause you never know who may be listening and get offended."
I am a joker at work and I believe it is ALWAYS important to listen when other peoples feeling are brought up. Maybe someone will back you up, maybe everyone will back you up. You never know. good luck

chicken wing chicken wing
lets go eat a chicken wing

chicken wing chicken wing
lets go eat a chicken wing

chicken wing chicken wing
lets go eat a chicken wing
Tomorrow is chicken wing day
buffalo wild wings

jusme

That is an AWESOME idea.

chip

jmhs- IMO hotwingeater wrote some good advice. I'll bet HR wouldn't be to keen about your co-worker's jokes. If for some reason, you don't want to confront the joker in person,file a complaint to HR about the joker's jokes. Watch the jokes stop....
chip

I like chicken wings as well. Hot and spicy is the only way to go.

Don S

Darn. I clicked on this thread thinking I was going to read some great jokes about alcoholism.
I don't know, in our family we joke about everything. When my mom got throat cancer we joked about it all the way through the surgery, chemo, and radiation. She loved it. We joked about whether she was going to start smoking again. She didn't. We joked about the fact that my father still smoked after all that--if you can't find that funny, you're just going to stress yourself out.
When I was in high school, I remember a teacher asking me in great exasperation, 'Don, do you find everything funny?!' My reply: 'well, it beats the alternative!'

Develop some good oneliners, and turn the conversation towards something else. Or just smile and remember the old saying: a smile is the next best thing to baring your teeth.
Don S

YankInHolland

jmhs002, Not to make light of your plight, but I always like to counter-joke about my reasons for quitting when it is brought up. Defuse the sitation with humor.

My favorite counter-jab is to use Robin Williams' one-liner about his reasons for quitting drinking:

"Yeah, I guess I got tired of waking up at 4:00 in the morning, lying under the bumper of my car with my keys in my ass...."

If the situation is more serious, I'd suggest that you do look into talking to your HR person about it. They typically maintain high ethical standards and would preserve your confidentiality.

fraankie

well, it's a power play
he is a co-worker
so
let him have his fun
give a chuckle
and
then change the focus
to something job related

people like that have a tendency to go away after a while
and
you will still be there

best
fraankie

daddysgirl29

ROFL!!!! I had to share that one w/ my coworker. Thanks for the laugh! Gotta love Robin Williams!

On a serious note, jmhs002, I was in HR for almost 8 years (which lead me to become an alkie...), and I would NEVER have tolerated that from this guy. How insensitive, rude and unnecessary! Try to talk to him, and if that doesn't work (or if he starts going behind your back, which is worse...), talk to HR. Good luck and keep us posted.

Hugs,

Don S

A professor of chemistry wanted to teach his 5th grade class a lesson about the evils of liquor, so he produced an experiment that involved a glass of water, a glass of whiskey, and two worms.

"Now, class. Observe the worms closely," said the professor putting a worm first into the water.

The worm in the water writhed about, happy as a worm in water could be.

The second worm, he put into the whiskey. It writhed painfully, and it quickly sank to the bottom, dead as a doornail.

"Now, what lesson can we derive from this experiment?" the professor asked.

Little Johnny raised his hand and wisely responded:

"Drink whiskey and you won't get worms!"



Ok, I promise I won't do any more. Here's a web site if you want to have some fun:
http://nickscape.net/recoveryzone/recovery4.htm

I understand this can be a serious issue, jmhs.
Don

Five

Ha ha ha I really liked that.

Just leaving a bloke standing in the street, talking to himself, then realises that you are two hundred yards down the street...ha ha ha ha ha

liked that.

Five

I've got a good one! A brilliant one:

I WAS WALKING DOWN THE STREET, AND A MAN COMES UP TO ME, AND BLOWS MY LEG OFF WITH A shotgun.

er.

cough.

Rubbish joke.

Five

I love taking the micky out of my alcoholisim (whilst taking it internally very seriously).

Laughter in the dark, as Nabakov puts it.