Kellye C

I was at a meeting last night and a lady shared something that answered a question for me that I've had for months. It may not be a big deal to anyone else but for me it was so profound that I was speechless.

I shared in a meeting several months ago that in sobriety I don't know who I am or what I want and I felt lost.

This lady last night said she went through something similar and was told years ago by a man with 30 plus years sobriety "Of course you don't know who you are. You are no longer the person you used to be when you were drinking and you have not yet grown into the person you are going to be". She described it as kind of being in a hallway waiting to pass or grow into the next level.

I hope this makes sense and helps someone, it sure made me feel better. It reinforced what my sponsor is always telling me when I get frustrated by my progress in sobriety. "You are exactly where you are supposed to be".

Hugs,
Kellye

hotwingeatter

In my future of sobriety I want to be a Fire Engine.
seriously I am tired of the feeling of not knowing who I am anymore. I can't wait to figure it out.

Kellye C

You and me both (not the fire engine thing LOL!!) But at least I got an explanation of why I currently feel like I don't know who I am!! That helped some!

fraankie

"to Thine Own Self, Be True"
It Happens

nutz

cool, i love ah ha moments
thanks for sharing.

my 2 doors experinces.lol
Sometimes it takes months
yeap, I always trip in the hallway between the 2 doors.
I kick , fight, scream, get scare, get lost,confuss,angery, cry
I become like a child
I give up/let go of everything
I stop, I surrender
nothing happens...sometimes for weeks to months
I feel like I'm having a break down
I'm in a state of dispair, naked, bare,hopeless,powerless
Then a part of me feels like it's dying.
so I just let it be or just be, becuase I tried everything already.lol
Then something amazing happens!!!
I feel touched, loved, more loved then I've ever experienced
I don't even walk through the other door
The light is all around me, everything is open,new or greater.
One time I heard a laughing vioce..."welcome to my world..dude"

hotwingeatter

Fine don't be a Fire Engine. That's just fewer people getting in the way of my dreams.

findingout

Thanks Kellye This was a good Ah Ha moment.

I can relate to the feeling of not knowing who or what. I remember thinking "Man, I'm 40 years old and I don't even know who I am." What I think now is that learning and accepting that whatever else I might be, I was certainly an alcoholic was the first true thing I had learned about myself in a long time. Everything else since has just kind of flowed from that one single thing and my decision to do something about it. For sure, I am not the same person at 43 that I was as 40 and I am not the only person who is glad of that either

One Love, One Heart,
Tony