livlaphluv

Hey all. Well this coming Saturday will be one month for me! It hasn't been easy but I've pushed through. Today I had a really bad afternoon. I can't even put into words how I felt but I know I wanted a beer and I guess if I had to give the emotion a name I would say I was angry. Really po'd that I couldn't drink. And I was having a lot of anxiety. It's like I proved to myself I can do it but the alcoholic in me is still putting up a fight - you know? An hour later I was totally over it and happy again. Am I crazy? I sometimes feel like it. I have to deal with all these feelings that I used to just drink away and ignore. This may be the hardest part of sobriety. Does this part of it ever go away? I really love my new sober life, I feel so good normally. But I still have these 'episodes'.

Anyway, coming here is really an inspiration. I see those of you that have been sober for so long and care so much about those of us struggling - I have so much admiration for you all!! And even the ones struggling right beside me your an inspration too because it reminds me why I decided to become sober. And it's nice to know I'm not alone.

Thanks to all of you and here's to my one month!!
Kelley

In memory of miracle

Congradulations!

jmhs002

Congrats Kelley! Wow time flies huh? I can relate to your post, as we all have our moments, but it has gotten easier for me. Do you have any local support (AA or sober group of some sort?) That has helped me a lot - it is really nice to know that you are not alone. Keep up the good work!
JMHS

2ndTime

Congratulations Kelley! I just hit my 30 days this week also, and no it wasn't easy getting here, but every day seems easier than the last. This last week alone I was faced with ending a dead end relationship and getting laid off from my job of 11 years, suprisingly enough I haven't had the slightest desire to drink! I personally think it's the AA meetings I attend that had prepared me to deal with the challenges that were headed my way. Just over a month ago the smallest thing would set me off to drink, now I am amazingly calm and take things as they come, one day at a time. It does get easier, you just gotta believe. Commit yourself to your recovery, go to meetings, read the forums, do some daily meditations, most importantly just for today, don't drink. All of a sudden it just happens! It will happen for you too! A great daily meditation book to pick up is " a woman's spirit ", keeps me on track. Good luck on your journey!
Keep coming back,
Robin

BikerBill8

Congrat's on your 30 days.

michaelj

Kelley,
Well done on your 30 days. It's quite a milestone and you should treat yourself for achieving it.
The craving you describe does come along now and then but, thankfully, less and less often. I think you have to prepare yourself for its reappearance every once in a while. When the cravings do come along you just need to tell yourself that they will pass. It's a bind but it seems to happen to everybody.
I have read here that the cravings come at fairly predictable intervals and maybe someone out there can give you some info on that.
In the meantime, well done again,
Michael

CarolD

Glad to see you are going forward in recovery.

AA meetings are where I learned how to stay in sobriety.

Blessings...

lonlion

Congratulations Liv,

The more challeges we can overcome sober, the stronger our resilience builds. We learn to live like "others" who deal with all kinds of crap sober. (I never understood that before).

Now I live with the saying, "That which does not kill you, or make you drink/use, makes you stronger!"

Keep coming back
Big hugs
Diana

Time2Surrender

Congradulations.

KelKel

Kelley
:sunani

PlanoTexican

Congratulations on your first month. Have many more.

Chabroso

Sincere congratulations. I found that first month the most difficult of all. Strangely that seems to be the period of time that really tests us. I don't know whether worse things happen to us in that month or just that we are allowing ourselves to feel it and experience it with a clear head. We have to deal with issues that we used to blank out with alcohol.
The thing I used to help me through was that "No matter how bad things are going, a drink will make it worse" I had to test that one out a few times and it's the truth.

Now no matter what happens, I know from experience that drinking does make it worse. It turns the good things bad too in the event I would decide to celebrate with a drink, for the good things.

Now no matter what happens I deal with it sober. It does become easier as you put some distance between yourself and the last drink you had. I have a few sober years behind me now and I assure you it gets much easier.

jmhs002

Kelley- still out there????

livlaphluv

Still here - still sober!!