StayingSober

Last time I posted that I need a drink people told me to stop saying that I need to drink because I only want to drink but damn it, right now I NEED to drink.

I've been pretty bad with it lately, using alcohol to self medicate all of my problems.. I still consider myself to be quitting, I'm quitting and drinking at the same time. I'm so pathetic.
Sorry, just not sure what to do, I don't feel like I can stay here or it'll just get so bad that I can't resist and I'll give up (again ). But I don't think I can go anywhere else either. I don't know what I can do. I need to drink right now. I need to drink. I should be drinking, I deserve to go back to living like I was a while ago...

wantneeda

Hi stayingsober!!! big hugs to you! one minute at a time...call someone to go for coffee...call the AA hotline...get out of your head, anything but take that first drink!!!
keep posting, read around SR. You're in my thoughts and prayers!~!! You;'re not alone!
Wendy

angelgirl

Please stop saying you need a drink. You don't need a drink, but you do need to go get some help. Please do. you are worth it!!! You CAN fight this if you choose. Join AA/NA. Go to treatment, go to detox, see a drug and alcohol counselor, there is so much help out there, just need to go get the help. I know this is easier said than done, but you do sound as though you want help, so PLEASE get some.. We have been right where you are, some of us are still there. We travel this journey together. One day at a time..
Please take everyones advice... Love, becky

wantneeda

pssst...you are NOT pathetic...just afflicted with a disease called alcoholism. there is a way out. Its your choice. Once i realized i had a choice things changed for me. Keep coming back!!

CarolD

keep drinking until we are ready to be sober.
The harsh fact is that...
untreated alcoholism is fatal.

I need to live more than I need to drink.

Keep trying, AA works as do other programs.
What does not work is sitting around drunk.

Get busy saving your life..You can do recovery.

Lawry

Quote - "I should be drinking, I deserve to go back to living like I was a while ago... "

Were you happy while you were drinking ? DO you not remember the pain, guilt, feelings of worthlessness ? Is that what you deserve ?

Do you want to fail or succeed ?

QueenShenique

I love how we alcoholics think--I need a drink--yeah--when we are detoxing it seems that way--we suffer from the disease of perception--what sometimes feels and appears to be real is a LIE. The body detoxing cries out for the poison that brought it to that place to begin with. Try the ol' orange juice and honey--it will help some of the physical--and get into the solution as others have already told you. Reach out for recovery, phone calls, meetings--get outside and start breathing some air--get those shoes off and walk in the grass. If we take the action to break the obsession results happen. The big question is--do you really want to be sober or do you need to suffer some more? Drinking for us is like shoving a gun up our butt and pulling the trigger. But, until you've had enough it's hard to be willing. Seek the solution. We'll leave the light on for you. Blessings, Queenshenique

Anna

Hi,

You are not pathetic and you do not deserve a life of drinking. No one does. I felt like you did too, like I didn't deserve any better. That's a barrier you need to break through because you do deserve the best. You can stop drinking by stopping right now for today. That's all you need to do. Just take small steps and you'll begin to move forward. You can beat the cravings and become stronger.

Keep posting.

Love, Anna

michaelj

Whatever you do, do not pick up that first drink. If you do the remorse, the self-loathing and the despair will make your needs seem like a walk in the park. Just tell yourself you need to stay sober till bedtime, that way sobriety becomes manageable. The best advice of all is to get help, go to AA, go to Rational Recovery, do anything but drink.
Michael

fraankie

well, posting on the forum helps
but
like my sponsor suggested years ago
"call me before you take a drink"
go to Aa or whatever
get a sponsor
and call before you drink

i did it
it works

KarenOskie

Hi StayingSober,
I hope you made it through the night last night! I remember so very well how you feel. It's hell! But tonight I don't want a drink. It's because I've been going to meetings, praying, talking to other alcoholics, reading and sharing here, making some positive changes in my life. It's hard to believe from where you sit now, or where you sat last night anyway, but the truth is, sober feels SO much better than drinking! You aren't pathetic, and if you start doing the things you need to do to get sober and keep doing them to stay sober, you'll know that. Please keep coming back.

michski

Staying Sober... I so hope you live up to your name. I remember there were times in my own early sobriety that I believed that I needed a drink in order to breathe another breath. You're engaged in chemical warfare! Please be the winner and not wake up even worse cravings! All this stuff will pass, exercise does really help!

AndrewBeen

You are not alone. I sometimes wish I could go back also. Back to when I could drink, enjoy it and it doesn't get out of control, or back to before booze was in my life. But I can't got back. My life, brain and body are different now. I know for me I can only go forward. I need to learn how to do everything all over again if I am to stop drinking. If I don't I will be led to madness, sickness and death. I can't go back.

Good luck, mate.

historyteach

Obsession -
A persistent, unwanted idea or impulse that can not be eliminated by logic or reasoning.

A recurring, unwanted idea that cannot be eliminated. Obsessive ideas are often unreasonable and disturbing. Preoccupation with an obsessive idea can interfere with normal daily activities.

Seems to me you have an obsession.
The others gave good ideas and resources to overcome this obsession.
I wish you the best!
Shalom!

Caramell

No. Say NO, nevertheless believe in it it or no. Stay from the bed, walk around the hous. Turn on TV. Turn on music. Turn on your pc and start to brows. Just read, watch, surf - even porno or what else. Think on this - after one hour I will be a bit better. But don't stop walk, search, doing something. Try to clean a bit a house. Clean your face, shave yourself. Do many many small things without big efforts, but things which are good - cleaning, ordering... - the feeling that you are ordering your life, starting from dirty hous is wonderful. After one hour you WILL be better. Then start next hour. Go to the mirror - look this face and say - man, I am looking good, I am getting better! You DO getting better. Go to the videoshop and take some films - stupid, but comedy, with nice collors, nice people. Think - see, all these people are sober. Life is nice, why not to be like them? Keep moving. Clean, wash, order your books. Just do it - remember - all you need is few f*****g hours without alcohol - then you will realize that you don't want to drink. But these hours are terrible, I know. I survived. I didn't die. After 12 hours you will thing other things. But now - don't stop and do WHATELSE, just don't think abt one drink.Please!